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Hi, Mike. I'm an alcoholic. Thanks for having me. I love Alcoholics Anonymous. Wonderful life today. Very fortunate to be here in October. My sobriety date, so I bet, 1984, but I've been sober a little while. Got some friends here, you know. I know Oscar, and we used to do a lot of these boating trips. We still do a bunch, but not as many, and Oscar was great on the grill, and he came out on the next boating trip. He wasn't there, and I was doing the grilling and saying, I was

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not as good as Oscar, and I got my tri-tip just perfect, but as I was taking it off the grill, I dropped it on the grill. Today, sobriety's fun. It is fun. I love being sober. I've got a busy, sober life. Last night, tonight, tomorrow morning, another meeting. We have an AA barbecue in the afternoon at Stepping Stones, and then another meeting tomorrow night. Alcoholics Anonymous is a huge part of my life. I was at a meeting not too long ago, and a newcomer said,

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some people see the glass as being half empty. Some see it as being half full. He sees it as having room for vodka, and today, the miracle of Alcoholics Anonymous is it's just not there. Like the book says, the obsession has been removed. I've got a great life today, and alcohol is not part of it, thankfully, because a lot of what I do today is still what I did when I was new. I'm doing the same thing I did when I was new.

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It's just, it's actually easy to stay sober, I think. You know, certainly life's got its challenges and ups and downs and stuff, but it's just, I keep showing up and willing and doing what I was shown to do when I was new and trying to improve on that. Anything goes good, you know? So anyway, I'll get started at the beginning. I was born in New York City, Jersey. I was a short, fat kid.

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First, I was on the swim team, and let me tell you something. Little fat boys have no business being in a Speedo. I felt like everybody was looking and laughing at me, you know? I just, from my earliest memory, I didn't feel like I fit in. You know, my dad just passed away a couple of months ago. He was 46 years sober, but I grew up in an alcoholic home. My mom had six kids in seven years, five boys and a girl, and out of the five boys, three of us are in AA, and I grew up in an alcoholic home.

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And the other two, in my opinion, should be in AA. And so we had a drunken house. It was a crazy house. And you know, another thing I just remember as a kid is just being confused. You know, I'm not really sure how to get along. Everybody seemed to be doing okay, and I just felt like I didn't feel like I really fit in.

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Bases were loaded, and the scores, nothing, nothing. It was two outs. And I got up, and I hit a grand slam. And the way I was treated after the game was the way I wanted to be treated all the time. And I heard someone say, and I agree with him, if you treat me special, I feel average, and if you treat me average, I feel neglected. And I always felt neglected. And I had to get, I needed attention. You know, I'm an alcoholic. I believe we're all like that.

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And I think the alcoholic has an invisible billboard around their neck that says, treat me special, starting now.

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And that was me. I wanted attention now. And one of the problems was, you know, my older brother was a straight-A student, and my dad was a straight-A student, Ford Law School scholarship, and then off to NYU for another degree in something.

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And I have no idea what it was. But no matter what I did, you know, if I came home with a B or an A, or, you know, I was like, okay, that thing was hosted.

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It's not that I identify with one talking about not really fitting in. I was, I didn't fit in. You know, they were, my dad, like my older brother, and then there was me, who was the complete opposite of my older brother.

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I was, you know, basically a D, F tech student, you know, didn't get along in class, always destructive, dad of the principal's office.

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Always in trouble. And, you know, again, as a kid, just never feel like I fit in. Another thing that I didn't quite understand was, you know, as a kid, my dad did his undergraduate work in seminary.

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So, you know, we would go to church all the time. I didn't get it. You know, everybody, you know, looks like they're looking up in the sky, and everybody's getting it.

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And I'm like, what the hell are they looking at? You know, I've done a confession, and I'm coming up feeling guiltier than when I went in.

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When I went to the police.

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I didn't understand it.

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You know, it says things like, if you were raised in a certain faith, it's a good idea to go back and investigate it.

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Or it also says, be quick to see what our religious friends are like, take advantage of what they offer, you know.

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So, you know, I realized that what I learned at seven, eight, nine years old, you know, as a fearful, confused kid, was useless.

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In my 20s, 30s, 40s, and 50s.

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And I had to go back and take a look at what I learned and relearn it.

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Actually learn what it was that they were talking about.

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So, you know, I'm very grateful for Alcoholics Anonymous and all that.

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But so as a kid, you know, growing up, I didn't fit in.

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You know, always a fight in the house.

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Always a fight.

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Somebody was getting a razzed kid.

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Somebody was getting yelled at.

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We were dirt poor.

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My dad was always losing jobs and stuff.

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And, you know, that's the other thing.

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You know, go.

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Go get an education.

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I'm like, for what?

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You're always getting fired from, you know, a job.

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And shut up, you little asshole.

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I get that response, you know.

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And, you know, and I started, I didn't understand, you know, they're telling me to do all this stuff.

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But then, you know, we got nothing.

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We're dirt poor.

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And I remember also it seemed even when I tried to do something nice for somebody, you know, it didn't work out.

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You know, my mom, my parents got divorced.

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My dad moved out.

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We were really poor.

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And my mom had gotten the only new car she ever got in her life.

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And I'm thinking, you know, let me go wash mom's car for her.

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Do something nice for her.

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So I grabbed the Comet cleanser.

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When I got done with that thing, that car looked like it was about 15 years old.

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You know, I'm a little bit, you know, trying to do something nice.

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You know, it didn't seem to work out.

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You know, as a kid, I struggled.

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You know, I struggled.

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You know, adults were always yelling at me, you know, what the hell is wrong with you?

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You know, teachers were always asking that question, you know.

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And that's an irritating question because, you know, I did feel, you know, different.

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You know, I felt different.

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I had no idea.

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People were asking me these questions.

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What the hell is wrong with you?

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You know, and I ended up having to go see the psychiatrist, you know, or later before we all started drinking.

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Me and my brothers were in court ordered to go to family therapy, which, you know, that was a lot of work.

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It was a pain in the ass.

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You know, we were just like always trying to figure out, you know, what was wrong with us.

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And I got, I ended up starting to get into a lot of trouble.

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And I got sent away when I was 15.

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And I remember thinking, you know, I'm not a bad person.

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You know, why am I getting sent away?

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You know, why are these problems?

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And I got sent away.

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And one of the things about this place was it was on like a point system.

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If you did something right, you got points and you could spend them on a movie on Friday or something like that.

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And if you did something wrong, they took points away from you.

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And I was like, the first week, I was like negative 5,000 points for the next month, for the next year.

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I don't think I would have broke either.

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I was up there and I was standing outside with the guys, you know, and I never felt like I fit in.

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You know, I never felt like Dixon was enough.

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I wanted to be more than what I was.

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I always felt like I had to be a funny guy or a tough guy or something.

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You know, I always wanted to be a little bit more, you know.

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And I'm standing outside with the guys and someone pops up with a bottle of wine.

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And I remember taking a little sip off it and I felt something.

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I said, hey, can I see that back a second?

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And I took the bottle and I just drank it.

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And everybody said, hey, send me some.

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You know, and I was right from the first drink, you know, selfish, self-centered.

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You know, you guys are going to have to get yourself another bottle.

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This one's taken.

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You know, and my first drink, I got into trouble.

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I go back into class and I puked all over class.

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And later they sent me to the doctor and they asked, where are you drinking?

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And, you know, you give me an opportunity to lie.

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Even if you don't.

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You know, I'm going to take it.

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You know, no, I wasn't drinking on something nasty for lunch.

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I remember one time we had broken into my neighbor's house.

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We stole all her liquor.

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Me and my brother.

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And in Jersey, we call it a graveyard.

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Just pour it all into one pitcher.

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He put that up and went off to the park.

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And I puked like right away and went over to the side of this building.

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There's my brother on his back, puking straight up in the air.

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I'm leaning up against the building and the cop goes, where are you drinking?

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I keep going.

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Hey, I'm glad I'm still over there, but they don't have patience for kids today.

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You know, you get arrested.

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They let us go along.

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Yeah, we were we were, you know, we were juvenile delinquents.

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We were we were problems.

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We hung out in this wood.

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I remember this one time, this woods we hang out in and the cop said, you know, get the hell out of here.

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You guys can't come.

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And so me and the boys went over behind the church and one would go off and we'd light the woods on fire and they would come down and put it out.

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This went on after about five times.

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Lighting the woods on fire and the firemen coming down and putting it out.

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The cop finally came over and said, you guys can hang out there.

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Just don't cause any problems for the neighbors around there.

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And, you know, so we had our victory, you know, and that was that was my life.

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It was like me against the world.

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You know, I just felt like I was fighting everyone, but they didn't like the stuff that I was doing.

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I don't blame them.

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I don't blame them at all.

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You know, and so I ended up going to that before school.

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I got out when I was six, 15 and I went to high school.

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I remember my.

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My first year in high school and I met a guy as I'm walking up to the school and he goes, come on, I'll show you where everybody parties.

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And that was great.

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You know, all the I did a lot of drugs and, you know, before school, we're getting I'm out, you know, by the time homework comes around, my head's on the desk and I'm falling asleep and I'm going home.

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I don't want to be here.

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You know, and I got ninth grade.

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I got expelled from school and my mom passed away a couple of years ago.

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We were cleaning out a place and she had saved all our report cards.

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And my last.

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Report card, she looks at it and she goes, she goes, is this real?

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It was straight up.

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Yeah, I didn't like school that much.

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My daughter was there and she goes, what is it?

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You know, she's over at UCLA now.

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She's on the Dean's list.

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You know, it's amazing if you do the homework, if you apply yourself and that's what I find myself.

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It's amazing how really good things can go, you know, but I didn't.

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I was busy fighting them all.

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So I started.

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When I was 15, I'll give you an idea of my drinking.

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If prior to AA, I didn't work.

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If I did, I was a tree climber and I remember we did this job for this lady, right?

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She goes, this job, she goes, boys, all I have is this old scotch.

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Would you like some?

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And I remember thinking, break it out, granny.

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And she, she comes out with a fifth of scotch and it's too hard to bite, right?

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And so I pour myself a glass.

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I pass it to my buddy and I drain it.

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I'm pouring the second one.

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You know, when you're out clogging.

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And, and problems just seem to find you, right?

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And you get a sense of when trouble's brewing, right?

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I'm looking at this lady's face and I'm like, you know, we've got to wrap this thing up quick

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because she's starting to lose patience with us for whatever reason, you know?

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And so I poured my second drink and within just a couple of minutes, there's a little

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splash left in this bottle, right?

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And I go, here, I'll finish that for you.

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She goes, give me that thing.

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And we're leaving.

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I asked my friend, I go, what the hell got her so angry?

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You know, and I didn't realize the effect I had on other people.

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I was like a bad rash that just wouldn't go away.

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You know, it's like, and it just seemed to come naturally being a puritan, you know?

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And then, but then I could, I could justify my actions.

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You know, I started thinking, you know, I asked my friend, I said, Jesus Christ, if

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she didn't want us to drink at all, why wouldn't she say something?

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You know, and I didn't realize that normal drinkers don't hand two guys a fifth of scotch

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and say, don't drink at all.

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They just assume you're not gonna.

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You know, the other thing that I missed was, you know,

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Jesus Christ, if she didn't want us to drink at all, why would she, why would she give

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us those big glasses?

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She gave us these big glasses.

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She implied, help yourself, which I did, but I did wrong.

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You know, and that was, that was what I didn't understand.

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I was always like, what did I do wrong?

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I didn't understand.

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I could not see my role in this, you know?

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And that's how my life went.

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I drank for 10 years and that was just, you know, it was just a series of problems and

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problems that I created and then trying to overcome these problems.

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You know, people would always say, Mike, what's wrong with you?

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You know, why do you act like that?

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Why do you drink like you shouldn't drink so much?

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You know, and alcohol looked like my problem.

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Alcohol, anybody that saw me would say, that boy shouldn't drink.

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Alcohol's his problem.

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And they would say, that is the most irritating question I've been for the alcoholic.

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What is wrong with you?

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Because I felt different, but I had no idea.

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I had no idea why I drank like that.

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You know, and I didn't realize until I got into AA that alcohol wasn't my problem.

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Not drinking was my problem.

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I didn't know how to get along out there.

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I didn't know how to fit in out there.

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Alcohol made everything okay.

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When I drank, I felt okay.

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So, you know, there were some problems that went along with it.

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That's just, that's just what happens when you drink.

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You know, you're going to have some problems, you know, that you're going to have to overcome.

207
00:14:10,980 --> 00:14:12,980
And I just, you know, assumed that.

208
00:14:12,980 --> 00:14:14,980
So I was always in trouble.

209
00:14:14,980 --> 00:14:19,980
You know, always, you know, down at the police station and, you know, I never really had a car.

210
00:14:19,980 --> 00:14:26,780
You know, if I did have a car, you know, I didn't have any of the appropriate paperwork because there's really never any extra money for that.

211
00:14:26,780 --> 00:14:28,980
That really, to me, seemed optional.

212
00:14:28,980 --> 00:14:34,580
You know, in my thinking, you know, really, what do you need insurance for or registration?

213
00:14:34,580 --> 00:14:36,580
You know, I really need to drink.

214
00:14:36,580 --> 00:14:37,680
I did a lot of drugs.

215
00:14:37,680 --> 00:14:41,580
I really need to do that more than I need to have my car registered.

216
00:14:41,580 --> 00:14:44,680
And so it was always, I would buy just these cheap cars.

217
00:14:44,680 --> 00:14:48,580
You know, they would always get on the hook and they were in town free.

218
00:14:48,580 --> 00:14:50,080
Plus, I never had a license either.

219
00:14:50,080 --> 00:14:51,680
They were always just getting my license.

220
00:14:51,680 --> 00:14:53,580
I'd get it and try to behave.

221
00:14:53,580 --> 00:14:55,780
And within a couple of months, they would pick my license.

222
00:14:55,780 --> 00:14:58,880
I was always in trouble and just like, I didn't know what was wrong with me.

223
00:14:58,880 --> 00:15:02,680
And I started, you know, when I started drinking, my dad started getting sober.

224
00:15:02,680 --> 00:15:07,180
So the big book was always around the house, you know, and initially it was a big joke.

225
00:15:07,180 --> 00:15:08,680
You know, dad's an alcoholic.

226
00:15:08,680 --> 00:15:10,280
You know, he belongs in AA.

227
00:15:10,280 --> 00:15:14,080
You know, if I ever get like that, you know, maybe I'll go check out AA and stuff.

228
00:15:14,080 --> 00:15:16,580
And I was just a smart ass little kid.

229
00:15:16,580 --> 00:15:17,980
I love that line in the big book.

230
00:15:17,980 --> 00:15:18,480
It says,

231
00:15:18,580 --> 00:15:22,680
Defiance is the outstanding characteristic of the alcoholic.

232
00:15:22,680 --> 00:15:23,880
And that was me.

233
00:15:23,880 --> 00:15:25,880
I was like, you can't make me do it.

234
00:15:25,880 --> 00:15:26,980
I'm not going to do it.

235
00:15:26,980 --> 00:15:27,780
You can't meet.

236
00:15:27,780 --> 00:15:29,380
That was, that was my attitude.

237
00:15:29,380 --> 00:15:34,980
You know, I was, I was fighting the world and I ended up and eventually, you know, you get worn out doing that.

238
00:15:34,980 --> 00:15:35,680
I do.

239
00:15:35,680 --> 00:15:39,080
And I started thinking, you know, I was maybe 23, 22.

240
00:15:39,080 --> 00:15:42,280
And I started thinking, you know, maybe I got a problem with alcohol.

241
00:15:42,280 --> 00:15:47,380
Hey, let me, you know, I don't want to jump to conclusions around, you know, let me investigate this.

242
00:15:47,380 --> 00:15:48,480
And I went to an alcoholism counselor.

243
00:15:48,580 --> 00:15:51,180
And I said, how do you know if you're an alcoholic or not?

244
00:15:51,180 --> 00:15:53,180
He says, try going five days without drinking.

245
00:15:53,180 --> 00:15:54,880
I couldn't even make it five days.

246
00:15:54,880 --> 00:16:01,980
You know, and I went into my first rehab and it was a 30 day rehab and I'm in there and I'm thinking, you know, I'm going to get out of here.

247
00:16:01,980 --> 00:16:03,380
I'm not going to be drinking or anything.

248
00:16:03,380 --> 00:16:05,180
I'm going to get a job, get it.

249
00:16:05,180 --> 00:16:09,280
I'm going to get it to get a car, get a job, get my own place to live and stuff.

250
00:16:09,280 --> 00:16:11,880
And I started putting conditions on my sobriety.

251
00:16:11,880 --> 00:16:13,080
And that's not what happened.

252
00:16:13,080 --> 00:16:18,180
I got out and I started going to AA and I'm living at this house with four other guys that drink like me.

253
00:16:18,180 --> 00:16:20,480
And my sponsor says, you got to move out of it.

254
00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:23,280
You know, you're going to end up drinking if you, if you don't move out of there.

255
00:16:23,280 --> 00:16:24,080
And I had no money.

256
00:16:24,080 --> 00:16:24,680
I had nowhere to move.

257
00:16:24,680 --> 00:16:30,180
I moved into the backseat of my girlfriend's car in January in Jersey, you know, freezing.

258
00:16:30,180 --> 00:16:39,380
She would come out at like five, six o'clock in the morning, wake me up and, and chase me off the property because she didn't want her mom seeing her homeless boyfriend sleeping in her car.

259
00:16:39,380 --> 00:16:43,680
And I would just wander the neighborhood, you know, wondering, trying to figure things out.

260
00:16:43,680 --> 00:16:44,880
What's wrong with me?

261
00:16:44,880 --> 00:16:45,780
What's my next move?

262
00:16:45,780 --> 00:16:47,980
And you know, that girl's mom.

263
00:16:47,980 --> 00:16:50,480
I had to make amends to in sobriety.

264
00:16:50,480 --> 00:16:52,680
She would, she, she had this attitude.

265
00:16:52,680 --> 00:16:53,780
Like she would tolerate me.

266
00:16:53,780 --> 00:16:57,080
She was, she like, let me in the house, but she had this attitude.

267
00:16:57,080 --> 00:16:58,380
Like, don't feed the dog.

268
00:16:58,380 --> 00:16:59,780
You'll never get rid of them.

269
00:16:59,780 --> 00:17:01,080
You know what I mean?

270
00:17:01,080 --> 00:17:02,880
So, you know, you don't like me.

271
00:17:02,880 --> 00:17:04,480
I'm not going to like you back, you know?

272
00:17:04,480 --> 00:17:07,380
And so she was a big lady and she liked to desert him.

273
00:17:07,380 --> 00:17:12,480
So I'd go every time I went home to the house, I'd take her can of whipped cream.

274
00:17:12,480 --> 00:17:14,080
I'd suck the nitrous out of the thing.

275
00:17:14,080 --> 00:17:17,180
And I remember her one night putting whipped cream on her dessert.

276
00:17:17,180 --> 00:17:17,880
It's just dripping.

277
00:17:17,880 --> 00:17:21,680
Out of the kid, the third, dead kid whipped cream.

278
00:17:21,680 --> 00:17:28,590
I thought, well, that's my spot.

279
00:17:28,590 --> 00:17:29,890
She was there for two days.

280
00:17:29,890 --> 00:17:30,090
Yeah.

281
00:17:30,090 --> 00:17:32,490
One that I wasn't around to go on the team that I was.

282
00:17:32,490 --> 00:17:39,390
So, you know, it's tough just fighting the world, you know, and I'm running out of gas and getting worn out.

283
00:17:39,390 --> 00:17:43,090
You know, and I'm, I started going to come out of that rehab and I'm drinking again.

284
00:17:43,090 --> 00:17:46,490
And I would like Jersey's don't call, you know, we got to get out of Jersey.

285
00:17:46,490 --> 00:17:49,290
So we, we, my brother had moved out here to California.

286
00:17:49,390 --> 00:17:52,690
And he came home and said, Hey, you guys want to go to California?

287
00:17:52,690 --> 00:17:55,090
And so me and a buddy, you know, we just got off work.

288
00:17:55,090 --> 00:17:56,390
We each had like 50 bucks.

289
00:17:56,390 --> 00:17:57,790
We're like, yeah, let's go to California.

290
00:17:57,790 --> 00:17:58,890
We come out here.

291
00:17:58,890 --> 00:18:02,990
And within a week, I had gotten a job and got fired from a job.

292
00:18:02,990 --> 00:18:06,690
And my buddy's dad got him a job out here and had a company truck.

293
00:18:06,690 --> 00:18:08,590
And he totaled that the first week.

294
00:18:08,590 --> 00:18:12,590
So immediately we were like, and we're living on the beach here in California.

295
00:18:12,590 --> 00:18:13,690
Man, this place is off.

296
00:18:13,690 --> 00:18:14,890
You got to get back to Jersey.

297
00:18:14,890 --> 00:18:17,690
And we started, took us six months to hitchhike back to Jersey.

298
00:18:17,690 --> 00:18:19,190
A couple of highlights of that trip.

299
00:18:19,190 --> 00:18:23,890
It was, we're up in Reno and we met this guy that worked for a company that made these

300
00:18:23,890 --> 00:18:27,590
plastic free drink chips for all the major casinos.

301
00:18:27,590 --> 00:18:30,790
And he opened this trunk and there were thousands of them there.

302
00:18:30,790 --> 00:18:35,990
I'm like jackpot, you know, and all we did was wake up, get hammered, go pass out, get

303
00:18:35,990 --> 00:18:37,590
up, go get hammered, pass out.

304
00:18:37,590 --> 00:18:40,790
And after about three days, this, I go to my brother, I go, man, we got to get out of

305
00:18:40,790 --> 00:18:40,890
here.

306
00:18:40,890 --> 00:18:42,190
We're going to end up alcoholic.

307
00:18:42,190 --> 00:18:42,990
If we stick around.

308
00:18:42,990 --> 00:18:49,250
We're going to continue to get out to Tucson.

309
00:18:49,350 --> 00:18:53,950
You know, we're on the street down there, no money, selling plasma to get money to drink,

310
00:18:53,950 --> 00:18:58,750
you know, get bologna for sandwiches and stuff, you know, just trying, just trying to get by

311
00:18:58,750 --> 00:19:02,350
and just wondering how did I ever get, you know, what, what the hell happened?

312
00:19:02,350 --> 00:19:04,050
I'm not a stupid person.

313
00:19:04,050 --> 00:19:05,550
I got some abilities.

314
00:19:05,550 --> 00:19:09,250
How did I ever get to this point where I'm just completely shut out?

315
00:19:09,250 --> 00:19:14,350
Like, you know, and I ended up getting back to Jersey and I got into a lot of trouble.

316
00:19:14,350 --> 00:19:17,850
I remember waking up one morning and just all hung over.

317
00:19:17,850 --> 00:19:18,950
A lot of people were mad at me.

318
00:19:19,350 --> 00:19:23,350
I opened a can of beer and looking at it and thinking, you know, that's, that's it.

319
00:19:23,350 --> 00:19:24,250
That's it.

320
00:19:24,250 --> 00:19:25,750
I can't, I can't drink anymore.

321
00:19:25,750 --> 00:19:30,850
You know, I'm putting the beer down and calling my mom and saying, you know, is there another rehab I can get into?

322
00:19:30,850 --> 00:19:35,650
And she goes, you know, you need a longer, you know, you're messed up.

323
00:19:35,650 --> 00:19:36,150
You need her.

324
00:19:36,150 --> 00:19:37,050
You need a good rehab.

325
00:19:37,050 --> 00:19:41,450
And so she gets me to this place in seven in Denver called Santa Cora.

326
00:19:41,450 --> 00:19:45,350
It's a two-year drug and alcohol rehab and I'm flying out to Denver.

327
00:19:45,350 --> 00:19:48,150
I'm like, man, I've been in one for 30 days and that was awful.

328
00:19:48,150 --> 00:19:48,750
There's no way.

329
00:19:48,750 --> 00:19:51,950
I've lasted two years in this place, but I know where else to go.

330
00:19:51,950 --> 00:19:53,250
Thankfully, I know where else to go.

331
00:19:53,250 --> 00:19:56,250
And I get there and I'm on one of the things that you can't do.

332
00:19:56,250 --> 00:19:58,050
They got all these rules and stuff, right?

333
00:19:58,050 --> 00:20:01,050
One of the things you can't do is say anything negative.

334
00:20:01,050 --> 00:20:01,750
I'm new.

335
00:20:01,750 --> 00:20:05,050
I got nothing positive to say.

336
00:20:05,050 --> 00:20:05,750
Shut up.

337
00:20:05,750 --> 00:20:06,650
And then I got to happen.

338
00:20:06,650 --> 00:20:07,450
I'm from Jersey.

339
00:20:07,450 --> 00:20:08,750
I got a big mouth, right?

340
00:20:08,750 --> 00:20:12,650
And so after about like six days in this, I go up to the director of the place.

341
00:20:12,650 --> 00:20:14,250
I go, I don't think I belong in here.

342
00:20:14,250 --> 00:20:15,250
Let's get out.

343
00:20:15,250 --> 00:20:16,050
I'm like, where?

344
00:20:16,050 --> 00:20:16,750
He's like, get out.

345
00:20:16,750 --> 00:20:18,550
They had to physically throw me out.

346
00:20:18,550 --> 00:20:20,350
I'm with my stuff.

347
00:20:20,350 --> 00:20:22,150
I remember it was a Thursday night in Denver.

348
00:20:22,150 --> 00:20:26,350
There's a light rain falling and I'm standing on the corner in Denver with everything.

349
00:20:26,350 --> 00:20:29,050
I own the two glad bags full of stuff right now.

350
00:20:29,050 --> 00:20:31,450
And you know, the book talks about a higher problem.

351
00:20:31,450 --> 00:20:32,950
I believe I was helped that night.

352
00:20:32,950 --> 00:20:35,350
You know, I believe my heart will put this guy in my life.

353
00:20:35,350 --> 00:20:37,550
Along comes this guy staggering down the street.

354
00:20:37,550 --> 00:20:40,750
You've been hoping for the half full six and an open beer.

355
00:20:40,750 --> 00:20:41,950
And he goes, do you want one?

356
00:20:41,950 --> 00:20:44,750
I wanted to drink as bad as I've ever wanted to drink in my life.

357
00:20:44,750 --> 00:20:45,950
But I knew it was.

358
00:20:45,950 --> 00:20:48,450
I knew if I took that drink, I would be just like,

359
00:20:48,450 --> 00:20:52,250
I'm just staggered to see around the streets of Denver.

360
00:20:52,250 --> 00:20:53,250
And I had been there.

361
00:20:53,250 --> 00:20:54,450
I didn't want that anymore.

362
00:20:54,450 --> 00:20:57,150
And I said, no, but can you get me to the airport?

363
00:20:57,150 --> 00:20:59,050
Two brothers out here at the time.

364
00:20:59,050 --> 00:20:59,750
And there's that.

365
00:20:59,750 --> 00:21:03,150
They said, if you get to the airport, there's plane tickets to come out to L.A.

366
00:21:03,150 --> 00:21:09,950
And, you know, the book talks about the loneliness of the alcoholic and seeking out lower companions of which I clearly was.

367
00:21:09,950 --> 00:21:12,150
He goes, hang out with me tonight.

368
00:21:12,150 --> 00:21:14,450
I'll make sure you catch your flight in the morning.

369
00:21:14,450 --> 00:21:17,850
I hung out with this guy and I saw what an active what I looked like.

370
00:21:17,850 --> 00:21:20,350
If I were to drink, you know, and it wasn't appealing.

371
00:21:20,350 --> 00:21:22,250
And I and I came out here to California.

372
00:21:22,250 --> 00:21:25,050
I'm 60 days sober and I'm pissed.

373
00:21:25,050 --> 00:21:31,050
I'll tell you honestly, you know, you hear I've heard speaker speak saying, you know, I walked through the doors of AA and I knew I was home.

374
00:21:31,050 --> 00:21:35,350
I walked through the doors of AA and I was angry because this wasn't where I wanted to be.

375
00:21:35,350 --> 00:21:37,050
I was 25 years old.

376
00:21:37,050 --> 00:21:40,550
My life was washed up. I had no jobs here with no education.

377
00:21:40,550 --> 00:21:42,850
No, I had nothing. Absolutely nothing.

378
00:21:42,850 --> 00:21:47,450
You know, and I get out here and my brother starts taking me around to these meetings and I'm standing on the wall.

379
00:21:47,450 --> 00:21:49,150
I'm not talking anymore.

380
00:21:49,150 --> 00:21:53,950
Nobody's coming up to me and I don't feel like I'm fitting in and I'm feeling uncomfortable.

381
00:21:53,950 --> 00:21:55,750
I call my uncle who's sober a long time.

382
00:21:55,750 --> 00:22:01,650
He's my aunt's call Clancy and and talk to him and I and he did and I didn't.

383
00:22:01,650 --> 00:22:04,950
He took me to a meeting Saturday night lay life meeting in Santa Monica.

384
00:22:04,950 --> 00:22:07,950
And I remember going in there and him introduced me around.

385
00:22:07,950 --> 00:22:10,850
Just the welcome I got was unbelievable.

386
00:22:10,850 --> 00:22:13,050
You know, everybody. Hey Mike, I'm glad you're here.

387
00:22:13,050 --> 00:22:16,450
We're glad you're here. And you know, if you're new, we're truly glad you're here.

388
00:22:16,450 --> 00:22:16,750
Right?

389
00:22:17,450 --> 00:22:22,050
There out there is, you know, if it was fun, I'd still be out there.

390
00:22:22,050 --> 00:22:26,750
It was not fun, you know, and in here, you know, we can learn how to have the life.

391
00:22:26,750 --> 00:22:32,050
We've always gone, you know, and so I got in there and I didn't understand why everybody was so glad to see me.

392
00:22:32,050 --> 00:22:35,750
You know, I've been going to AA and I didn't understand how this thing worked.

393
00:22:35,750 --> 00:22:36,950
It made no sense to me.

394
00:22:36,950 --> 00:22:38,350
You know, they're talking about drinking.

395
00:22:38,350 --> 00:22:43,250
I got all these problems, you know, and I didn't understand how alcoholics anonymous work.

396
00:22:43,250 --> 00:22:47,350
And so I started going to the meetings and and they're big on service there.

397
00:22:47,350 --> 00:22:50,850
And right away, they're like, like, why don't you get on the cleanup crew?

398
00:22:50,850 --> 00:22:56,050
And you know, I got sponsor and I started every time I went to a little problem.

399
00:22:56,050 --> 00:22:59,150
He'd be like, you'd be like, you need to get on the setup crew.

400
00:22:59,150 --> 00:23:01,050
You need to do smash troops.

401
00:23:01,050 --> 00:23:02,650
You need to take the trash out.

402
00:23:02,650 --> 00:23:07,950
You know, and I go up to one night and I said, you know, another, the world is ending.

403
00:23:07,950 --> 00:23:09,550
One of my world is ending problems.

404
00:23:09,550 --> 00:23:12,350
And it was probably something as simple as, you know, I was trying to eat my lunch and there was a fly that kept bothering me, you know, and so I told him what the problem was.

405
00:23:12,350 --> 00:23:19,550
And he goes, you know, Mike, tonight's your lucky night.

406
00:23:19,550 --> 00:23:22,050
This meeting needs a GSR and you're it.

407
00:23:22,050 --> 00:23:25,850
And he goes, by the way, that's a two year commitment.

408
00:23:25,850 --> 00:23:32,550
And I started doing service, you know, and I learned how to get my people to change, change my actions.

409
00:23:32,550 --> 00:23:36,150
And I learned that if I change my actions, my thinking will change.

410
00:23:36,150 --> 00:23:40,850
But all my life, hard AA, I had been thinking about what's wrong with me and what I needed to do to change.

411
00:23:40,850 --> 00:23:41,350
And I learned that if I change my actions, my thinking will change.

412
00:23:41,350 --> 00:23:41,850
And I learned that if I change my actions, my thinking will change.

413
00:23:41,850 --> 00:23:42,650
And I learned that if I change my actions, my thinking will change.

414
00:23:42,650 --> 00:23:45,750
And I found that thinking is just going to make things worse.

415
00:23:45,750 --> 00:23:49,350
But if I can change my actions, eventually my thinking will change.

416
00:23:49,350 --> 00:23:50,250
And it did.

417
00:23:50,250 --> 00:23:53,750
And I remember, like I said, I was not happy I was here.

418
00:23:53,750 --> 00:23:58,850
I realized I started, I could turn a positive thing negative really fast.

419
00:23:58,850 --> 00:24:03,750
And I remember thinking, I got all these janitorial duties at all these meetings.

420
00:24:03,750 --> 00:24:05,150
I'm going to meeting every time.

421
00:24:05,150 --> 00:24:07,350
And I'm thinking, no way they're so glad to see me.

422
00:24:07,350 --> 00:24:10,050
They just got a janitor that's going to work for free.

423
00:24:10,050 --> 00:24:10,850
You know?

424
00:24:10,850 --> 00:24:11,750
And I'm like.

425
00:24:11,750 --> 00:24:16,150
And my brother managed a place called the Coffee Spot in Santa Monica.

426
00:24:16,150 --> 00:24:17,450
And he got me a job there.

427
00:24:17,450 --> 00:24:21,550
And I remember him trying to explain one of the cotton machines to me.

428
00:24:21,550 --> 00:24:23,450
And I was pretty toasted when I came in.

429
00:24:23,450 --> 00:24:27,950
You know, he's like, Mike, this is the on button and this is the off button.

430
00:24:27,950 --> 00:24:29,750
I remember thinking, could you repeat that?

431
00:24:29,750 --> 00:24:32,750
I was pretty toasted.

432
00:24:32,750 --> 00:24:39,650
You know, a guy with such low self-esteem, during the day I was a trash man and at night I was in jail.

433
00:24:39,650 --> 00:24:40,950
I don't ever want to be.

434
00:24:40,950 --> 00:24:42,850
I hope I don't ever forget.

435
00:24:42,850 --> 00:24:48,550
But the end of my drinking was on the struggle to learn how to stay sober that I had to go through.

436
00:24:48,550 --> 00:24:51,050
And I don't ever want to go through that again.

437
00:24:51,050 --> 00:24:53,050
And thankfully, you know, I don't have to.

438
00:24:53,050 --> 00:24:53,650
I don't have to.

439
00:24:53,650 --> 00:24:59,150
So anyway, that job at the coffee spot, you know, you're paying me four bucks an hour, right?

440
00:24:59,150 --> 00:25:01,550
And in six months, I'm six months over.

441
00:25:01,550 --> 00:25:04,150
And the owner of the company goes, Mike, we're going to have to let you go.

442
00:25:04,150 --> 00:25:05,150
I go, are you kidding?

443
00:25:05,150 --> 00:25:05,750
Why?

444
00:25:05,750 --> 00:25:07,650
And she goes, you argue with everybody.

445
00:25:07,650 --> 00:25:09,450
I go, but they argue with me.

446
00:25:09,450 --> 00:25:10,650
What am I supposed to do?

447
00:25:10,650 --> 00:25:13,450
You know, I did not know how to get along.

448
00:25:13,450 --> 00:25:15,150
I did not know how to get along.

449
00:25:15,150 --> 00:25:18,450
And the reality of this, she was paying me four dollars an hour to be there.

450
00:25:18,450 --> 00:25:21,450
I should have been paying her forty dollars an hour to be there.

451
00:25:21,450 --> 00:25:24,250
I was like customer repellent.

452
00:25:24,250 --> 00:25:25,450
It was it was a struggle.

453
00:25:25,450 --> 00:25:26,650
You know, it was a struggle.

454
00:25:26,650 --> 00:25:32,850
And I started learning what they were teaching me, you know, to be a service, be a service, be a service.

455
00:25:32,850 --> 00:25:34,650
And I started changing my attitude.

456
00:25:34,650 --> 00:25:38,750
You know, I started changing in these rooms, you know, and it started with the laughter.

457
00:25:38,750 --> 00:25:39,750
You know, I remember.

458
00:25:39,750 --> 00:25:46,250
They have it on the wall at the Wednesday night meeting, you know, just looking at everybody and thinking, you know, I'm different.

459
00:25:46,250 --> 00:25:47,250
I'm different.

460
00:25:47,250 --> 00:25:48,750
I'm not going to fit in.

461
00:25:48,750 --> 00:25:50,550
You know, everybody seems to have it together.

462
00:25:50,550 --> 00:25:51,750
They look good.

463
00:25:51,750 --> 00:25:52,750
Most people have a car.

464
00:25:52,750 --> 00:25:55,250
They got some money, a place to live and stuff like that.

465
00:25:55,250 --> 00:25:57,550
And here comes a guy that looks like I felt.

466
00:25:57,550 --> 00:26:01,150
We start talking and, you know, turns out we like motorcycles.

467
00:26:01,150 --> 00:26:08,350
You know, he said that I told him a story that one time I was I was so drunk, you know, as long as I was moving, I could keep the bike up.

468
00:26:08,350 --> 00:26:08,750
Right.

469
00:26:08,750 --> 00:26:09,050
Right.

470
00:26:09,050 --> 00:26:09,550
Right.

471
00:26:09,550 --> 00:26:12,550
A red light or something would just fall right over.

472
00:26:12,550 --> 00:26:18,850
Because he told me about a time that he had left the bar drunk, crashed his motorcycle and couldn't get it off him.

473
00:26:18,850 --> 00:26:21,550
So he just laid there and smoked his pot until someone came along.

474
00:26:21,550 --> 00:26:32,150
And I, you know, don't understand.

475
00:26:32,150 --> 00:26:36,050
You know, I remember a lot of people messed up in the witness.

476
00:26:36,050 --> 00:26:37,050
I'm rather dirty.

477
00:26:37,050 --> 00:26:38,050
I remember them yelling.

478
00:26:38,050 --> 00:26:39,150
I don't mind you.

479
00:26:39,550 --> 00:26:44,630
And I had to learn how to live for myself.

480
00:26:47,200 --> 00:26:49,980
You know, it's going to be, everything's going to be okay.

481
00:26:50,320 --> 00:26:58,560
You know, and I started, and I started with, I was the type of guy that, you know, I had the attitude like, give me the fire and then I'll put the wood in.

482
00:26:58,760 --> 00:27:02,740
I wanted to see that this thing worked before I was willing to put in any effort.

483
00:27:02,740 --> 00:27:04,280
I didn't trust anything.

484
00:27:04,520 --> 00:27:05,860
I didn't, I didn't trust anything.

485
00:27:06,020 --> 00:27:07,060
I didn't believe anybody.

486
00:27:07,060 --> 00:27:11,460
And eventually I started, but I knew, I knew one thing for sure.

487
00:27:11,580 --> 00:27:13,200
My best thinking got me to AA.

488
00:27:13,460 --> 00:27:15,960
And I thought about things a lot, all the time.

489
00:27:16,160 --> 00:27:19,740
Best answer I ever came up with was go to Alcoholics Anonymous.

490
00:27:19,860 --> 00:27:22,940
So I knew I had to listen to somebody else.

491
00:27:23,060 --> 00:27:25,060
I had to take direction from somebody else.

492
00:27:25,260 --> 00:27:28,740
And I was around a lot of other people that were in the same boat that I was.

493
00:27:28,740 --> 00:27:34,920
There was a lot of other guys that were all, you know, down and out, nowhere to go, you know, starting from the bottom.

494
00:27:35,080 --> 00:27:37,040
And we were all just trying to find our way.

495
00:27:37,260 --> 00:27:38,660
Talking about our lousy jobs.

496
00:27:38,860 --> 00:27:41,860
One of, one of my friends, he had a, he was all excited.

497
00:27:42,060 --> 00:27:45,660
He came to the meeting, he goes, yeah, I just got a job selling stun guns over the phone.

498
00:27:45,860 --> 00:27:47,660
I was talking about a stun gun.

499
00:27:47,860 --> 00:27:49,860
Because everybody needs a stun gun.

500
00:27:50,060 --> 00:27:51,460
You know what I mean?

501
00:27:51,660 --> 00:28:03,460
I just remember, you know, what was constant with our, our, every night I was at a meeting.

502
00:28:03,660 --> 00:28:06,260
Every night I was doing some sort of service work.

503
00:28:06,260 --> 00:28:08,660
I started doing general service.

504
00:28:08,860 --> 00:28:10,260
I started getting into H&I.

505
00:28:10,460 --> 00:28:12,060
I still got, I still got a panel.

506
00:28:12,260 --> 00:28:14,460
I was out at Wayside on Wednesday night.

507
00:28:14,660 --> 00:28:15,660
You know, I got clearance.

508
00:28:15,860 --> 00:28:20,260
Now, back then, 30 years ago, 30, 34 years ago, you didn't need clearance.

509
00:28:20,460 --> 00:28:23,860
You just put your license down and you'd go in and do your panel and stuff.

510
00:28:24,060 --> 00:28:28,660
And one of the guys that I got sober with, he hadn't quite cleaned up the wreckage of his past.

511
00:28:28,860 --> 00:28:30,860
So he put his license down, went in to do the panel.

512
00:28:31,060 --> 00:28:32,660
And when he came out, they ran it.

513
00:28:32,860 --> 00:28:35,060
And he had some outstanding warrants.

514
00:28:35,060 --> 00:28:40,460
And so they were, they were patching down, he said, as they were walking the guys back to their cell.

515
00:28:40,660 --> 00:28:43,060
And one of the guys said, keep coming back.

516
00:28:43,260 --> 00:28:46,660
And the other guy said, that is not a great conclusion.

517
00:28:46,860 --> 00:28:48,840
He says, we need him.

518
00:28:49,040 --> 00:28:51,040
He came up with some, some little letters.

519
00:28:51,240 --> 00:28:52,840
You know, I was listening to the phone.

520
00:28:53,040 --> 00:28:57,640
You know, when he was drinking, he said he was so down and out and depressed, he was going to kill himself.

521
00:28:57,840 --> 00:29:02,040
He got a 30-foot rope and he climbed up on a 20-foot high garage roof and he jumped.

522
00:29:02,240 --> 00:29:03,040
He was going to hang himself.

523
00:29:03,240 --> 00:29:05,040
He goes, I'll have to spray my ankle.

524
00:29:05,040 --> 00:29:10,040
And I, and I, I, the stuff we do, you know, we got to be careful because we can hurt ourselves.

525
00:29:10,240 --> 00:29:14,440
This isn't really the easiest option, really the easier one.

526
00:29:14,640 --> 00:29:19,440
Just, you know, just what the hell, you know, someone suggested something just okay.

527
00:29:19,640 --> 00:29:25,040
You know, and I think that's probably the biggest thing that helped me was learning how to say yes.

528
00:29:25,240 --> 00:29:31,040
You know, I have, I've spoken to a lot of guys over the years and I hear a lot of excuses, you know, about how busy I am.

529
00:29:31,240 --> 00:29:31,640
I'm busy.

530
00:29:31,840 --> 00:29:32,040
I'm busy.

531
00:29:32,240 --> 00:29:32,640
And I get that.

532
00:29:32,840 --> 00:29:34,240
I believe we are busy.

533
00:29:34,240 --> 00:29:37,040
I'm busy between our ears because we don't stop thinking.

534
00:29:37,240 --> 00:29:42,240
We think about everything all the time, you know, so between my ears, I'm a busy person.

535
00:29:42,440 --> 00:29:46,040
But actually in reality, I can always squeeze a little bit more.

536
00:29:46,240 --> 00:29:51,840
I can always do a little bit more for the thing that's saving my life, you know, and, and, and that's the thing.

537
00:29:52,040 --> 00:29:53,040
Am I willing to do it?

538
00:29:53,240 --> 00:29:54,240
Am I willing to do it?

539
00:29:54,440 --> 00:29:56,640
Am I willing to show up whether I want to or not?

540
00:29:56,840 --> 00:29:57,840
And that's the key.

541
00:29:58,040 --> 00:30:00,640
You know, that's what I learned that that's what adults do.

542
00:30:00,840 --> 00:30:03,840
Adults do things they don't want to do.

543
00:30:03,840 --> 00:30:05,240
You know, like go to work here.

544
00:30:05,440 --> 00:30:07,840
You know, I think I was, I was bred for leisure.

545
00:30:08,040 --> 00:30:15,040
I was not, you know, this, this work thing was, was a bit of a surprise, but I could do it.

546
00:30:15,240 --> 00:30:19,960
You know, learning how and getting a career and a good job.

547
00:30:20,160 --> 00:30:23,360
And, you know, like I said, you know, we're, we're on these boating trips.

548
00:30:23,560 --> 00:30:29,360
I always wanted to go out to the lake and drink and watch other people go water skiing or watch them ride dirt bikes.

549
00:30:29,560 --> 00:30:30,360
Everybody had a dirt bike.

550
00:30:30,560 --> 00:30:33,960
You know, I had a bag of weed, you know, when we were kids, you know.

551
00:30:34,160 --> 00:30:35,760
We do a lot of motocross.

552
00:30:35,960 --> 00:30:36,760
We do a lot of trips.

553
00:30:36,960 --> 00:30:39,160
And, you know, we got the freedom today.

554
00:30:39,360 --> 00:30:40,760
I got the freedom today.

555
00:30:40,960 --> 00:30:47,960
Alcoholics Anonymous has given me the freedom to do anything I want to do if I'm willing to pay the price.

556
00:30:48,160 --> 00:30:55,960
If I'm willing to put in the effort, if I'm willing to pay the price and take care of the number one problem, and that's my alcoholism.

557
00:30:56,160 --> 00:30:59,960
If I'm, if I'm willing to do that, anything else is possible, I've found.

558
00:31:00,160 --> 00:31:03,960
And I don't know of any other organization in the world that can do that.

559
00:31:04,160 --> 00:31:10,960
I take a useless piece of flesh like myself and give them a useful, purposeful life like I had today.

560
00:31:11,160 --> 00:31:13,960
Like I said, you know, I'm married 28 years.

561
00:31:14,160 --> 00:31:19,160
That's, that's amazing that I can be actually in a relationship for that, for that long.

562
00:31:19,360 --> 00:31:20,360
You know, I'm a parent today.

563
00:31:20,560 --> 00:31:21,960
My kid does well.

564
00:31:22,160 --> 00:31:25,160
You know, I got, I'm not worried about where I'm going to sleep.

565
00:31:25,360 --> 00:31:26,160
I own my own home.

566
00:31:26,360 --> 00:31:27,760
I got a car, you know.

567
00:31:27,960 --> 00:31:33,760
And if you're new, you know, I remember thinking when I was new and I used to listen to the old timers talk about what a good life they have.

568
00:31:34,160 --> 00:31:36,360
I remember I used to just think, oh, shut up.

569
00:31:36,560 --> 00:31:48,160
Because I didn't think I could ever get, you know, I didn't think I, it seemed like the mountain that I had to climb to get from where I was to where the people were that they were talking about just seemed impossible.

570
00:31:48,360 --> 00:32:00,960
But, you know, slowly over time, and if I'm willing to take care of my number one problem, which is my alcoholism and my inability to stay sober, if I'm willing to take care of that first, everything else seemed to fall in line.

571
00:32:01,160 --> 00:32:02,160
It took, it took years.

572
00:32:02,360 --> 00:32:02,960
It took a lot of time.

573
00:32:03,160 --> 00:32:03,960
You know, nothing.

574
00:32:04,160 --> 00:32:06,960
This program, or at least for me, happened quickly.

575
00:32:07,160 --> 00:32:08,160
But it does happen.

576
00:32:08,360 --> 00:32:10,160
You know, and those, those promises came true.

577
00:32:10,360 --> 00:32:12,960
And, you know, you know, today I have, I have a faith.

578
00:32:13,160 --> 00:32:13,960
I have an understanding.

579
00:32:14,160 --> 00:32:15,560
I got a spiritual advisor.

580
00:32:15,760 --> 00:32:16,360
I got a sponsor.

581
00:32:16,560 --> 00:32:16,960
He's funny.

582
00:32:17,160 --> 00:32:22,160
I got, you know, so they talk about, you know, you read about pride and humility a lot, right?

583
00:32:22,360 --> 00:32:23,960
Pride, I understand what pride is.

584
00:32:24,160 --> 00:32:26,760
For anyone that doesn't, I looked it up in Webster's Dictionary.

585
00:32:26,960 --> 00:32:29,160
There's 14 uses of the word pride.

586
00:32:29,360 --> 00:32:32,960
And the first one is an overinflated opinion of oneself.

587
00:32:33,160 --> 00:32:33,960
So I get that.

588
00:32:34,160 --> 00:32:35,160
I understand what pride is.

589
00:32:35,360 --> 00:32:39,160
But humility, what is, what does a self-centered person know about humility?

590
00:32:39,360 --> 00:32:43,760
So I got, years ago, I got my hands on everything I could find on humility.

591
00:32:43,960 --> 00:32:48,160
And I read all this stuff and I found out that it's possible to become too humble.

592
00:32:48,360 --> 00:32:52,360
And I called my sponsor up and I said, Bob, did you know it's possible to become too humble?

593
00:32:52,560 --> 00:32:54,960
He goes, that's not something you're going to have to worry about.

594
00:32:55,160 --> 00:33:00,960
And I don't, I don't know, you know, I could keep going on and on and on.

595
00:33:01,160 --> 00:33:02,660
I would just like to encourage you.

596
00:33:02,860 --> 00:33:03,960
If you're new, don't stop.

597
00:33:04,160 --> 00:33:06,960
You know, there are times when I just said, oh, screw it.

598
00:33:07,160 --> 00:33:08,160
I didn't want to be here.

599
00:33:08,360 --> 00:33:11,360
But I went anywhere because I had nowhere else to go.

600
00:33:11,560 --> 00:33:13,760
And eventually, eventually it clicked.

601
00:33:13,960 --> 00:33:17,160
You know, they said, they told me there's only two times you should go to a meeting.

602
00:33:17,360 --> 00:33:20,160
When you feel like going and when you don't feel like going.

603
00:33:20,360 --> 00:33:21,960
So go to a meeting all the time.

604
00:33:22,160 --> 00:33:23,560
It's basically what I found.

605
00:33:23,760 --> 00:33:26,360
And then when I got there, do something for it.

606
00:33:26,560 --> 00:33:28,160
And do it consistently.

607
00:33:28,360 --> 00:33:32,960
You know, and I'm just, like I said, I'm still doing the same thing that I was doing 34 years ago.

608
00:33:32,960 --> 00:33:33,760
Because it works.

609
00:33:33,960 --> 00:33:34,360
It works.

610
00:33:34,560 --> 00:33:35,960
And I got a great life as a result.

611
00:33:36,160 --> 00:33:36,360
Thank you.

612
00:33:36,560 --> 00:33:37,160
Thanks for having me.

613
00:33:37,360 --> 00:33:37,760
Thank you.