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 Hey everybody. My name is Jay Westbrook. I'm an alcoholic sober today by God's mercy and

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 practice of the principles of alcoholics and animus. So grateful to be here. Thank you all

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 for having me come talk to you tonight and just statistics. I'm in my first sobriety. I got sober

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 December 2nd, 1988. So assuming I go to bed sober tonight, that's 33 years, seven months and eight

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 days. And so grateful for it. I ran on burning building with my ass on fire and so far I haven't

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 run back in. It doesn't mean I won't, but so far I haven't and I'm grateful for that. I have

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 a sponsor. Her name is Kathy Neches. She knows she's my sponsor. I have a grand sponsor, Peggy

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 King. She knows she's my grand sponsor. I have sponsees that have sponsees and my home group

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 is the Daily Reprieve meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous here in Tupelo, Mississippi. We meet

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 seven mornings a week. And because of the time difference, I'm on Central Time. My other home

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 group is Zoon Log Cabin, 730 a.m. Monday through Friday. I host that room every day. I've lived a

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 lifetime in Los Angeles and moved here to Mississippi three months ago, right at the end

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 of March. And, you know, love absolutely loved Los Angeles. And then the music changed and I just

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 couldn't dance to it anymore. And Tupelo has everything that I was looking for. And I'm so

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 grateful to be here. I also go to a meeting in Bend, Oregon, Monday evenings on Zoom and Friday

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 evenings. I go to this little meeting in Yellowknife of the Northwest Territories in Canada,

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 240 miles from the Arctic Circle. And man, that's that's really interesting. You know,

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 little community up there, a lot of indigenous people. And through the winter, it's typical,

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 you know, average 37, 39, 41 below zero. And they're just like these happy people, I guess,

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 just being alive in that kind of weather. You know, hard place to be an alcoholic if you all

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 pass out on the way home, you know, fall down and pass out, you die just very quickly in that

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 kind of weather. So that's I love going to that meeting. And so that's me. And then I speak a

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 bunch around around the world on Zoom, speaking in London tomorrow. So here's what I want to say.

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 I want to talk about my favorite topic. That would be me. But before I do, let me say the important

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 stuff. And that's just welcome to Alcoholics Anonymous, we have a solution for your alcoholism.

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 If you're female or male, black and white, gay or straight, young or old, old timer, newcomer,

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 returnee, welcome to Alcoholics Anonymous, we have a solution for your alcoholism. If you're educated

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 or illiterate, sheltered or homeless, Republican or Democrat, tattooed or still an empty easel,

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 welcome to Alcoholics Anonymous, we have a solution for your alcoholism. And if you all

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 are anything like me, and you got up into these rooms going, Oh, my God, I can't believe it's

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 come to this. And I'm with a group of losers like you, or you're anything like me and simultaneously

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 felt Oh, my God, I can't believe a group of people like you would let a piece of shit like me even

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 stand in the doorway, let alone sit next to you, let alone have you remember my name. Welcome to

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 Alcoholics Anonymous, we have a solution for your alcoholism. And if you all are anything like me,

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 and you got up into these rooms with some issues, we don't have the solution for issues. But I

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 promise you that whatever your solution might be, it'll work better if you're clean and sober. And I

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 got here with issues. I'm a high school dropout with a master's degree. I went to 16 schools in

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 11 years and never did one year at one school. I was always the new kid came in the middle of the

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 year didn't make friends, isolated myself, but was also excluded by, you know, everyone who already

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 knew each other and I was new and they weren't interested. I'm also I come from a New York

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 communist atheist theatrical family, and I'm not sure what issues it gave me, but I know it gave

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 me some. And I think it's really important to say I'm an incest survivor of horrendous, horrendous

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 torture and incest from age three on. My parents gave me away when I was three and they wanted to

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 focus on a career and I think they thought they were giving me to a good family. They weren't. I

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 was three years old, terrified of the dark and this family locked me in a pitch black closet for

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 the next three years. And I lived, toileted, ate, slept, existed in that closet, pulled out once a

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 day to be washed, ritualistically tortured and raped. And I lost my sanity and safety and

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 security, my trust, my innocence, and was filled with absolute hate and rage that was unsafe to

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 turn on my perpetrators. So I turned it on me. And that's a habit that lasted for many decades,

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 hurting myself with my wounds, turning my legitimate anger and hate of my perpetrators

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 on myself. And when I finally got out of that situation and was reunited with my parents,

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 I was, I was just broken and periodically re-victimized. And then we moved to California.

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 I think I was 15 and the next year I found alcohol and drugs and God, I was so grateful. They were a

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 solution. They were not a problem. They kept me on the planet. They kept me from suiciding.

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 They let me stay in my skin, but over time, they certainly made me stupid. And that stupidity led

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 to bad decision-making and that decision-making put me in front of a power greater than myself,

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 Judge William Ritzy. And in my first ever encounter with the criminal justice system,

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 he slammed that gavel down and sentenced me to double five to life in the penitentiary. And man,

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 I did not, did not want to go because I had this absolutely stunningly beautiful wife at home who

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 was kinder than she was beautiful. And she was like movie star, beautiful, just like insane,

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 you know, the kind of beautiful where people would look at her and they'd look at me and they'd look

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 at her and they'd look at me and just shake their head and go, Oh my God, you know, he must be so

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 rich or so hung and I'm a hospice. So I'm a clinical hospice nurse, so you go figure.

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 And anyway, I was so green. This was my first encounter with the criminal justice system. I

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 didn't know there was a difference between jail and prison. Had no idea. So I had no fear and off

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 I went to the penitentiary. And that first night coming up from the chow hall five hours after I

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 checked in I was gang beaten and gang raped for the first time. And it happened throughout my

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 incarceration. And when I got out of that pen I was filled with bitterness and rage and blame

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 and cowardice and irresponsibility and a massive PTSD and massive shame. So not a vision for you.

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 And went right back to the lifestyle. And I'm going to back up for a minute because I think

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 there's something really important because I don't want to mislead you. I will tell you that

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 that beautifully, stunningly beautiful and kind wife Nancy that I had grew up in a loving, stable,

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 supportive, non-abusive home in Wichita, Kansas. She lived in one house her entire life. She went

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 to grade school, kindergarten grade school, junior high, high school with the same group of kids.

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 They had community. They stayed friends their entire lives. And she ended up with the same

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 disease, alcoholism and drug addiction that I have and the same solution, the 12 steps and the 12

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 traditions. So I don't want to mislead anyone and make you think that I'm saying that my incest and

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 torture caused my alcoholism because they didn't. And to say otherwise would be unfair to all of

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 those incest survivors who never picked up a drug, never picked up a drink, and certainly never used

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 that experience to excuse bad behavior, which is exactly what I did because of my alcohol.

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 And there was a time when the alcoholism and the drug addiction were not bad. I remember I worked

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 at the Troubadour from 1965 to 1972. It was the golden years at the Troubadour when people who

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 went on to play stadiums, people who did play stadiums around the world came to LA and played

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 that little 400 seat venue. And it was an amazing time to be there. And I came home from work one

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 night and I had bought cocaine for the first time. And our rent on Fuller Avenue right across from

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 Plummer Park, our rent was a hundred dollars a month. And I spent a hundred dollars on a

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 gram of cocaine. And I put it on this little desk and I was putting it on, I put it on a plate and

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 I was chopping lines. And Nancy, like she did every night, brought me a cup of coffee. And as

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 she turned, her elbow hit the coffee and that coffee hit the cocaine and washed it off onto

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 the floor. And she burst out crying. And I jumped up and grabbed her and hugged her and said, honey,

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 it's okay. It's just cocaine, you know. And we went from that to hope to die, drug addicts and

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 alcoholics, you know, until we got to these rooms. And these are the rooms that got the drink out of

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 my hand and the joint, the drink, the drink out of my hand and the joint out of my mouth and then

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 the needle out of my arm that took my ass from base to grace. And for that, I'll be forever

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 grateful. So, you know, we did it, Nancy and I did it till the wheels fell off. I did very

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 well in school in spite of the fact that I was getting loaded. I got a lot of letters to my name.

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 And at the end, you know, we lived in this lovely apartment across from Plummer Park. I drove a nice

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 car. I had this stunningly beautiful wife. I had a business card that said associate director of

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 medical research at a children's hospital here in Los Angeles, you know, and I couldn't look you in

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 the eye, but I could hand you that business card and I hated my job. Nancy and I never had children

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 because we didn't like children. Thank God we didn't have them. There are people who don't

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 like children and they go ahead and have them. Oh my God, I don't understand that. We didn't like

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 them. We didn't have them. And where am I working? At a children's hospital. That's alcoholism. And

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 I've got three guns on cock and lock because I'm thinking, right, you turn your back on a five year

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 old with leukemia. You don't know what that kid might do. Out of my mind, paranoid, insane. And

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 how they didn't know and have me arrested or at least fired is beyond me. Associate director of

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 medical research. And I just couldn't do it one more day. I was so lonely and baffled and

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 frustrated and confused and desperate and cornered and, and could not make it work.

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 It just, I tried so hard and, and Nancy and I couldn't make the relationship work. We loved

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 each other so much. The feelings of love were so deep and so intense, but they were not matched by

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 behavior. And we just didn't like the goddamn breaks were out and we didn't have an instruction

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 manual and we didn't know how to fix it. And massive unhappiness in every, every aspect of

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 my life. And I just decided I got to die. I can't do this anymore. And thank God I'm an alcoholic.

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 I just stuck one of those guns in my mouth, pulled the trigger and y'all have a different speaker

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 tonight. But because I'm an alcoholic, meaning I'm grandiose and arrogant and traumatic,

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 you know, I decided to stage, to kill myself, but stage it so that it looked like an accident

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 and I'd be out of my misery, but Nancy had had money from the insurance policies and the

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 accident insurance, accidental death insurance policies. And I set it up and it had to be,

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 you know, on this day at this time, and the thing was staged. And, and I'm sitting there that

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 afternoon and I'm snorting cocaine and I'm drinking Jack Daniels and a public service announcement

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 comes on the TV and it's this curly haired guy in a suit. And excuse me for not LA casual. I'm

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 almost always in a suit and dye. And it's this guy and he's got curly hair and he steps into a

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 bathroom stall. And I don't know how much time y'all spend in bathroom stalls, but I spent an

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 inordinate amount of time in bathroom stalls. And, uh, and he steps in there and he opens the vial

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 and he does a little one-on-one and as he's closing the vial, it falls and it rolls behind

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 the toilet. He gets down to grab it and his cheek is touching the public toilet seat and they freeze

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 frame. And the voiceover said, welcome to the glamorous world of cocaine. If you have a problem,

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 call this number. And a hundred times or 99 times, I'd seen that public service announcement and

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 thrown the finger. And that day I picked up the phone, burst into tears, picked up the phone and

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 called. And a guy on the other end of the line said, cocaine anonymous. This is Dean Katz. Can

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 I help you? Dean is still sober. And, uh, he talked to me for 90 minutes and then he said,

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 it's time to go to a meeting, you know, and thank God it was cocaine anonymous. Cause I had been AA

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 and they said, we got a meeting over here in a church. I wouldn't have gone. Y'all would have

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 had a different speaker tonight, but it was cocaine anonymous. And they said, we got a

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 meeting in a bar on the sunset strip. It's called Carlos and Charlie's. And I'd been in that bar

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 before I'd gotten loaded in that bar and I felt safe going. And then I went down and I got on my

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 motorcycle and before I could get the find, which of those holes to put the key in the bike. And I

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 just fell over and I let it lay and I got a cab up to Carlos and Charlie's and went in. And, um,

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 and in that meeting, I felt the breath of a God in whom I did not believe blowing on me with a

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 gentleness that I did not deserve. And then I had not, and I've been sober ever since. And they said

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 to me that night, um, you know, honey, you're, you're, you're sicker than most. And I went,

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 Oh my God, thank you. They said it wasn't a compliment observation. It was not a compliment

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 you would pro you're really sick. You would probably benefit from morning meetings where

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 cocaine addicts, we don't do anything in the morning, go to log cabin. It's an AA meeting

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 on Robertson, but you can talk about drugs. And in my third day sober Monday, December 5th,

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 1988, I walked in log cabin for the first time, you know, and a guy was in a pink shirt,

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 greeted me at the top of the steps. And he said, hi, honey, welcome to alcoholics anonymous. You

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 know, if you leave your fantasies at the door, all of your dreams can come true in AA. If you're

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 willing to work for them. I mean, my mouth gaped open and it was like, I didn't even realize there

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 was a difference between fantasies and dreams. And today I've lived that difference. You know,

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 and I told you that I hated my job. I don't like children. I don't particularly little children in

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 the hospital that was a children's hospital, you know? And, and so kept hearing, leave your

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 fantasies at the door and all of your dreams can come true if you're willing to work for them.

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 And that meeting ended. And I got in my car and I drove into the hospital and quit my job,

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 you know, and I drove downtown to LA County, USC Medical Center. And, and I got a job as a

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 cancer nurse. And that hospital serves the poorest of the poor. And there's very little early

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 detection and so many people die. And that was my dream to work with the dying. And I did that

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 for a year and got recruited to the pain management service and did that for a year and then made the

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 leap to hospice. And that's where I've been ever since. I've spent 31 years as a bedside hospice

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 nurse. I go from one dying person's house to another. I do the pain management with the dying.

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 I do the grief work with the dying and their families. And the third, the third step talks

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 about making a decision to turn will and life over to the care of God, meaning our thinking

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 and our behavior. I guess the shorthand for that is I'm going to do God's work. I'm not going to

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 do God's job. I'm going to do God's work. And, and I'd like to think that that's what I've gotten to

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 do in, in being privileged to work with the dying and the grieving. And, and what happened was that

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 the place where life and death meet is filled with God. That's not an opinion or a hypothesis

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 or a theory. The place where life and death meet is filled with God undeniably. That's my experience.

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 And that's where I found my God. That's where I found my God. I was seeking, but I had not found

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 God until I started doing that hospice work. And then I just had to figure out how does that God

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 that you cannot deny work with this horrendous history that I have. And that was a struggle to

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 make that work. And here's where I got to, and this is just me. And there's a, there's this

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 loving God who designed it, who created it and put it in motion and gave us free will. And that loving

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 God never leads, never leaves my side, co journeys with me always and co suffers with me, but does

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 not intervene. He is a non intervening God, but he co suffers with me. He watched me being raped

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 at three and four and five and six years old and wept at my suffering and looked at my rapist and

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 went to their suffering that they'd moved so far from his grace, but did not intervene because he

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 made them with everything they needed for redemption and made me with everything I needed

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 for resilience. And I don't know if they reached for it, but I know that I did first through drug

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 and alcohol. And when that didn't work, then, then through the amazing fellowship and the transformative

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 12 steps and 12 traditions of alcoholics anonymous, you know, and I'm so grateful that God was so

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 patient with me and so forgiving with me. And I want to pick up pieces of the story that I may

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 have left out. I got to tell you that I'm so grateful to have gotten here with the seconds

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 and inches where willingness and clarity because here's the deal. If you have the willingness,

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 but you lack the clarity about the problem, you could end up in church or yoga or therapy

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 or wilderness camp, all of which are good thing, but they don't treat alcoholism. And if on the

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 other hand, you got the clarity, but you lack the willingness, then you could be one of those people

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 who 15 years down the road has a drawer at home with 791 newcomer chips, two 30 day chips, one

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 60 day chip. And in 15 years, you've never seen a 90 day chip. And I got to tell you, that's a hard

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 way to do alcoholics anonymous, and it takes away the opportunity for all of the gifts that this

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 program has to offer. You know, this is a giving program they say, and I think that's true except

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 in the beginning. And in the beginning, it's not a giving program. It's a getting program, you know,

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 and the eight basics that you got to get are sober date and a home group and a seat and a posse and a

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 book and a sponsor and a commitment and a God. And if you get those eight things, you can't go wrong,

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 you know, and then you use those eight things. And as you go along, it switches from a getting

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 program to a giving and you start giving those things to people and our lives get immeasurably

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 better. I was sitting here doodling a couple weeks ago and kind of drawing out what I thought was a

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 cute pretend business card. And I had seen I drove a friend up to the airport from Tupelo to Memphis.

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 And as you go along, what's it called Winchester, Westchester Avenue, you turn off the highway to

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 head to the airport. It says Westbrook auto body shop. And that's my last name. Oh, that's cute.

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 So I was sketching like an auto repair car. I don't know why, you know, I'm a nurse. But

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 what I did was double hyphen, a re hyphen pair shop, the double a repair shop thinking that's

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 a and I thought that was pretty cute. And then I started thinking about it. And I went, No,

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 it's not cute. It's profound. Double A is Alcoholics Anonymous and really means again,

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 re means again, and pair, P I R means to connect or to bond. And that's what's happened to me in

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 Alcoholics Anonymous, I have been repaired, I have been reconnected, rebonded with a God

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 and with myself and with other people and with purpose and with principles, I got to tell you,

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 I am blessed and overpaid, without a doubt, you know, and I'd like to tell you that Nancy got

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 sober. You know, she saw me do this, and she was completely disinterested, had no interest in

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 sobriety. So I got her a big book. And it was third edition, which is a, you know, has a more

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 porous cover. And she used it as a coaster for her Crystal Rocks glasses filled with bourbon or

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 tequila. And, and I don't know, I was maybe seven weeks into my sobriety. And I was headed out to a

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 meeting. And she goes, Oh, my God, you're going to one of those things again tonight. I said, honey,

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 AA every morning, CA every night. Yes. But I've told you before, you don't have to be sober to

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 come. And it was like, she heard it for the first time. And she went, what? Well, could you wait a

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 minute? And she ran in the other room. And I heard the sound of one ice cube dropping into a glass

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 and then her pouring her liquor. And I heard, and she did a couple of lines and, and she came out

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 with a smile on her face and she said, well, let's go. And I said, all right. And off we went and

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 people would hug her and their head would pull back the alcohol coming out of her pores, you

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 know, and they just say, honey, we love you keep coming back. And she'd say, I'm just here to

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 support Jay. I'm just here because I'm lonely. And what happened in my first 90 days, she caught

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 alcoholism through her ears. And on my 90th day, she stood up and said, my name is Nancy Morgan

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 West. I'm a cocaine addict and an alcoholic. And she stayed sober the rest of her life,

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 another 23 and a half years. And she died 11 weeks to the day after our 42nd wedding anniversary in

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 my arms in our home on hospice with pancreatic cancer. And she died a sober one, you know, and

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 people say to me, man, don't you hate God for taking your wife? And I say, absolutely not. I

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 don't think God took my wife. I think the pancreatic cancer took her life and God was there

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 to receive it. And I wasn't sure I could stay sober through her death, but I got real clear that

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 I was willing to disrespect the program that gave Nancy so much, that gave Jay so much, and that

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 gave Jancy so much. We were that AA couple and we were Robertson Boulevard strong. I was the

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 steward of log cabin for 18 years. Nancy was on the board of directors of the West Hollywood

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 Recovery Center from the from the day they opened and until that last couple months when she just

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 couldn't - couple months before death when she couldn't do it. And so I just reframed my pain,

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 a small price to pay for a lifelong love affair, small price to pay. And I took my wedding ring off

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 and took my ring and Nancy's to JR, a custom jeweler in there, a private custom jeweler in

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 Beverly Hills. And I said, here are the rings, melt them together and make me a new one. And

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 that's what I wear today. You know, it's thicker and wider. It's a combination of our two rings.

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 So you kind of have Jancy speaking tonight. I'm so glad about that. I want to tell you that it's

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 pretty amazing that we did everything we were supposed to. We got commitments, we got the posse,

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 we went to meetings, we were of service, we took commitments, we got sponsors, we worked steps,

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 we did all that. A little hesitant about reading the book, you know, and I'm like this arrogant

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 dick. And I said to my sponsor, well, why should I read the book? I mean, I'm going to meetings

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 in Beverly Hills and Brentwood and Pacific Palisades and the boo, because it's too hard to

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 say Mala. And I'm hearing these speakers that are powerful and moving and poignant. Why should I

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 read that antiquated book? And my sponsor said, because those moving, powerful, poignant speakers

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 will have shit coming out of their mouth. It's well intended, but 180 degrees. And what the big

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 book of Alcoholics Anonymous says, and if you haven't read the book, then you're like a dead

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 dry leaf on a windy day, blown back and forth across the street by the opinion of the last

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 speaker you heard. And if they're entertaining, you may be more likely to believe to read the

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 book, you know, because here's the deal. They say, don't go to a treatment center. Oh my God,

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 you're buying yourself a $50,000 big book. What a waste of money. But the book says on page XXVI,

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 in the doctor's opinion, we favor hospitalization for the alcoholic who is jittery or befouled. And

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 they say the road gets narrow, but the book says on page 55 and 75, that we're on a broad highway.

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 And they say the women stick with the women and the men stick with the men. But nowhere in the

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 book does it say that. And it's clear that all of the early women had male sponsors. And I've had

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 male sponsors six of my 33 and a half years, and female sponsors 27 and a half of those years,

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 you know, and Nancy and I have both sponsored gay men and straight men and gay women and straight

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 women from the get go without regard for sexual orientation or gender. It's just about one

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 alcoholic carrying a message of depth and weight of hope and transformation. Got it. Thank you to

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 its suffering alcoholic, you know, and they say you can't date in your first year. But on page 69,

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 the big book says we don't want to be the arbiter of anyone's sexual conduct, dot, dot, dot,

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 we put each relationship to this simple test is it selfish, you know, and they say you're not sober

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 if you're taking psych meds or pain meds. But on page 133, and I'm paraphrasing the book says God

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 has wrought miracles in our physical and mental health. However, he's also gifted us with wonderful

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 practitioners, including the doctor, the psychologist, psychiatrist, who can be

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 indispensable to the alcoholic. So obviously, I've read the book, and I just didn't want to be one of

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 those guys running around telling everyone what they can't do and what they should do. And oh my

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 God, and just being as wrong as could be, you know, so read the book. And everything kind of goes full

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 circle. It's very interesting. So I am a high school dropout. I'm a high school dropout who

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 has taught and guest lecturer at Harvard Medical School, USC School of Medicine, UCLA School of

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 Medicine, at Yale School of Nursing, UCLA School of Nursing, and every registered nurse program,

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 at least 10 of them in the Los Angeles area. One of my next colleagues who's been invited back

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 to the prisons, the California Department of Corrections has had me come back to do five-hour

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 training for staff and inmate volunteers of the hospice on being with dying. The largest maximum

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 security prison in the United States is Angola State Penitentiary right outside of Baton Rouge,

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 Louisiana. And that's the prison I go to more than any other in my space. 89% of the men there

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 will die there because it's Louisiana, and they have sentences like 311 years to life, 244 years

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 to life, you know, but the number that gets me is that 92% of the men at Angola State Penitentiary,

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 the largest maximum security prison in the United States, 92% of the men there were under the

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 influence when they committed the crime that put them there. So in the big book of Alcoholics

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 Anonymous says that we either get sober or we face jails, institutions of death. It's not being

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 dramatic, you know, it's just being factual. And they also have an active death chamber at Angola

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 State Penitentiary, and I've stood in that death chamber with the warden. I mean, you can feel the

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 energy and it's very interesting. Sometimes my mouth just runs without thinking before I open it.

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 I don't know, six, seven visits back, I'm in that death chamber with Beryl Kane. He's the warden,

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 Beryl Kane, sweet man, good old southern boy with a good old southern name. And I turned to him and

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 I said, "Beryl, the last three guys executed in this room, what'd they do?" And I had absolutely

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 no reason to ask that question and no reason to get that information, but I asked, and he looked

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 me dead in the eye. And he didn't know, but I knew that had I committed the crimes that I got away

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 with in California, had I done them in Louisiana and been caught, tried, convicted and sentenced,

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 I could have been in that death chamber under very different circumstances and y'all would have had

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 a different speaker than I. But he looked me in the eye and he said, "Jay, while I'm not unwilling

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 to carry out the court mandated consequences of the prisoner's behavior, I will tell you that

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 every man who's executed in this room, I hold his hand, I tell him he's loved and he's not alone."

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 And it's like that warden lives what any of you who have ever heard me speak have heard me say,

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 and that is that God has no grandkids, only kids, and God doesn't make junk. And yes, that is true

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 for every single one of you here tonight. And it's true for me. And no matter how many times

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 I went out into the world and tried to behave in a way that would validate the lie that when God

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 made me, he made junk. The truth is that it's a lie, that God has no grandkids, only kids,

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 and God doesn't make junk. So here's the deal. I'll close by telling you I'm country and that's

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 how I always closed my pitch when I lived in LA. Drove a big black Dodge Ram pickup truck for 27

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 years, wear Lucasi cowboy boots, have a big cowboys of faith belt buckle, say y'all,

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 listen to 105.1 country music. My favorite kind of music is country music. My favorite group is

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 rascal flats. My favorite song is God bless the broken road. And all I can say is God bless the

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 broken road that led me straight to Nancy Morgan Westbrook. And God bless the broken road that led

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 me straight to Alcoholics Anonymous and God bless the broken road that led me straight to God. My

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 name is Jay Westbrook and I'm an alcoholic. Thank you. It's my story. I mean, I tell it,

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 but my job, the one I love doing is my walkthrough on applying the 12th through difference to

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 romantic relation. Monday through Friday, 730 AM. No, that's LA time. Monday through Friday,

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00:32:13,920 --> 00:32:30,400
 730 AM. The ID is 844-258-7346. And the, and the password is log cabin, one word with an uppercase

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 L and an uppercase C has to have one word log cabin. And, and we'd love to have you,

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 it's usually about 90 people every morning from all over the country, all over the world.

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 Different secretary, but it's always a one hour, 20 minute speaker and sharing. Yeah, absolutely.

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00:32:51,200 --> 00:32:56,800
 Hopefully to see you there. Yeah. You too. Good night. Thank you, Tracy. Yeah. It gets real good.

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 Feeling changes. Yeah. Francine ward talks about you want self-esteem do a steamable act and you

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 get self-esteem. Yeah. Not from affirmations, not from the label in your clothes or the car you

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 drive or the zip code you live in, but self-esteem comes from doing a steamable act and she's 40 some

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 years sober and just amazing and love that woman. So, yeah, absolutely. Abraham, you good? Yeah,

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 truly my pleasure. Yeah. Okay. I'm going to skedaddle here y'all. Everyone stay sober,

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 get a great weekend and we'll see you on campus.