1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:01,740
 I'm a movie star now, huh?

2
00:00:01,740 --> 00:00:03,400
 Callie, alcoholic.

3
00:00:03,400 --> 00:00:05,640
 Is that David Figaro I see over there?

4
00:00:05,640 --> 00:00:08,400
 He probably doesn't recognize, yeah it is, Mr. AA.

5
00:00:08,400 --> 00:00:09,880
 He probably doesn't recognize you have it

6
00:00:09,880 --> 00:00:11,680
 with this tie on, do you?

7
00:00:11,680 --> 00:00:13,840
 Thanks, Ben, for inviting me out.

8
00:00:13,840 --> 00:00:16,280
 Thanks, Abraham, for your share.

9
00:00:16,280 --> 00:00:20,120
 You know, when I was a kid, I never seemed to really fit in.

10
00:00:20,120 --> 00:00:23,320
 I had three older brothers and one older sister,

11
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 and I was always trying to keep up.

12
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 And I learned from a very young age

13
00:00:28,240 --> 00:00:29,960
 that adrenaline was my first drug.

14
00:00:29,960 --> 00:00:33,080
 And I always was doing the crazy stuff.

15
00:00:33,080 --> 00:00:36,080
 They'd kick a ball in a tree, they'd say, "Go get it."

16
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 And I'd be up there just hanging in this tiny little limbs

17
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 and the whole branch is moving, and I loved it.

18
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 It was that adrenaline.

19
00:00:44,520 --> 00:00:47,360
 And so I was always looking for something.

20
00:00:47,360 --> 00:00:49,960
 And I'd probably get introduced to alcohol

21
00:00:49,960 --> 00:00:53,920
 at about 12 years old, and that was it.

22
00:00:53,920 --> 00:00:55,760
 I knew that was it, and I had that.

23
00:00:55,760 --> 00:00:59,400
 So we would go to the grocery stores and steal alcohol,

24
00:00:59,400 --> 00:01:01,480
 'cause obviously they're not gonna sell alcohol

25
00:01:01,480 --> 00:01:04,280
 to a 12-year-old, so we'd just grab whatever.

26
00:01:04,280 --> 00:01:07,620
 If you guys remember those little club cocktails in the can,

27
00:01:07,620 --> 00:01:09,680
 we'd go in the store and we'd drink like four,

28
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 and just right there in the refrigerator,

29
00:01:11,920 --> 00:01:13,800
 stick our head in there and just drink 'em real quick,

30
00:01:13,800 --> 00:01:15,660
 leave the empty cans, and leave.

31
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 And that was how we got alcohol, a little, you know.

32
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 And I had older brothers,

33
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 and they started giving me alcohol and stuff,

34
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 and it was off, and so I would drink as much as I could

35
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 when I could get it.

36
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 But back then, I grew up in Canoga Park,

37
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 so not too far from here, these mild stomping grounds.

38
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 And my brothers sold pot, and he was five years,

39
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 four years older than I was,

40
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 and all my friends wanted to buy it too,

41
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 but he wouldn't sell it to 'em

42
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 because his girlfriend didn't want everybody

43
00:01:45,820 --> 00:01:48,640
 coming over to the house, so he would only sell it to me,

44
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 and then I would sell it to everybody else,

45
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 so I became, you know, the good, you know?

46
00:01:52,040 --> 00:01:54,080
 So that, I would drive around,

47
00:01:54,080 --> 00:01:55,800
 I had to drive around with a little pager.

48
00:01:55,800 --> 00:01:56,920
 Remember those little pagers?

49
00:01:56,920 --> 00:01:57,760
 Beep, beep, beep.

50
00:01:57,760 --> 00:01:59,000
 I'm dating myself, right?

51
00:01:59,000 --> 00:02:00,360
 (laughing)

52
00:02:00,360 --> 00:02:02,620
 And the pager would go off, I'd call you back.

53
00:02:02,620 --> 00:02:05,120
 Yeah, okay, what do you want?

54
00:02:05,120 --> 00:02:06,600
 Okay, there's a delivery fee.

55
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 There's always a delivery fee, and everybody knew that.

56
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 And so they had to get me high when I show up,

57
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 so here I am getting high for free.

58
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 And then, you know, I was going through,

59
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 that was just normal, and back in the day,

60
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 I rode a Honda 754, and back then,

61
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 that was the Superbike of the era.

62
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 That bike, when I got on it, I weighed about a buck 20

63
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 back then, and I don't even think that bike

64
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 knew I was on the back.

65
00:02:32,320 --> 00:02:36,960
 I bought this bike, and there was the adrenaline again.

66
00:02:36,960 --> 00:02:39,080
 I tell ya, there was no helmet laws back then,

67
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 so you can't visit the 70s and you can wear your head long,

68
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 and have the Ray-Ban sunglasses on.

69
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 And they were good up to about 75 miles an hour,

70
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 and then your tears, your eyes would start to tear up,

71
00:02:50,160 --> 00:02:52,720
 you know, and the long hair flowing in the, you know,

72
00:02:52,720 --> 00:02:54,400
 as you're riding the bike, you know.

73
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 And I bought that bike, and it was the first day I had it,

74
00:02:58,120 --> 00:03:01,360
 and I was riding up Choup towards Sherman Way right there,

75
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 and I saw the light starting to change, starting to flash,

76
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 so I just gunned it.

77
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 Front end came up off the ground a little bit,

78
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 and I took off, and I flew through that intersection

79
00:03:10,480 --> 00:03:11,320
 at Sherman Way.

80
00:03:11,320 --> 00:03:14,080
 I am in office, I was going, and I was flying up

81
00:03:14,080 --> 00:03:16,760
 all the way to Roscoe, and I get up to Roscoe,

82
00:03:16,760 --> 00:03:19,080
 it's a red light, so I sit there waiting,

83
00:03:19,080 --> 00:03:21,920
 and I'm sitting there waiting, and looking for traffic,

84
00:03:21,920 --> 00:03:23,920
 and all of a sudden, I see something out of the corner

85
00:03:23,920 --> 00:03:25,920
 of my eye, and it was a motorcycle cop,

86
00:03:25,920 --> 00:03:27,780
 and he pulled up and he kicked my front tire.

87
00:03:27,780 --> 00:03:28,880
 He's all, "Pull over!"

88
00:03:28,880 --> 00:03:29,720
 I'm like, "Oh, shit."

89
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 And so I pull over, and, "So you know how long

90
00:03:32,240 --> 00:03:33,680
 "it took me to catch up to you?"

91
00:03:33,680 --> 00:03:35,220
 I'm like, "Well, if I knew you were back there,

92
00:03:35,220 --> 00:03:37,880
 "I wouldn't have stopped for the red light, you know?"

93
00:03:37,880 --> 00:03:41,720
 And so I was all upset, you know, not even 24 hours

94
00:03:41,720 --> 00:03:43,920
 with that motorcycle, I got a ticket for speeding.

95
00:03:43,920 --> 00:03:45,280
 And he looked at me and he said, "You know,

96
00:03:45,280 --> 00:03:46,880
 "if you hit the ground going that fast,

97
00:03:46,880 --> 00:03:48,000
 "you're not gonna survive it."

98
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 And at the time, I thought, "You know what?

99
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 "Maybe I don't care."

100
00:03:50,280 --> 00:03:52,080
 You know, I was just in it for the moment.

101
00:03:52,080 --> 00:03:55,160
 And so I was pretty upset about getting the ticket

102
00:03:55,160 --> 00:03:56,760
 that soon after getting the bike,

103
00:03:56,760 --> 00:04:00,080
 and he wrote me the ticket, and he said that I could go,

104
00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:03,320
 and I put the bike in gear, and I gassed it real hard,

105
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 and the front end came up off the ground,

106
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 and the tire spun, and he chased me down

107
00:04:07,000 --> 00:04:08,480
 and wrote me another ticket.

108
00:04:08,480 --> 00:04:11,160
 I was two tickets and less than 24 hours on that bike,

109
00:04:11,160 --> 00:04:12,660
 and it was just on from there.

110
00:04:12,660 --> 00:04:17,160
 I got, you know, I was an alcoholic, where do you get a job?

111
00:04:17,160 --> 00:04:19,200
 You know, where am I gonna work, right?

112
00:04:19,200 --> 00:04:21,960
 So I went over to, there used to be,

113
00:04:21,960 --> 00:04:24,120
 across from the Promenade Mall,

114
00:04:24,120 --> 00:04:27,200
 Vendome Liquor over there, inside there was a,

115
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 so I went there and applied for the job of the manager.

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 He must have known alcoholics, man.

117
00:04:31,440 --> 00:04:34,720
 He looked at me and he says, "No, you're not hiring."

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 I'm like, "All right, whatever, so I'm leaving."

119
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 And there was a little deli inside the liquor store,

120
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 and the assistant manager comes out and says,

121
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 "Hey, you want a job?"

122
00:04:41,880 --> 00:04:42,900
 She says, "I'll give you a job."

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 I'm like, "Okay, cool."

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00:04:43,740 --> 00:04:45,640
 So I'm over there working in the deli,

125
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 and I'm not there more than about a month,

126
00:04:48,280 --> 00:04:49,800
 and then he's like, "Hey, you wanna go drinking?

127
00:04:49,800 --> 00:04:53,360
 "We're gonna go drinking over at Chute Park after."

128
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 He had a motorcycle, I had a motorcycle,

129
00:04:55,360 --> 00:04:57,800
 a couple other buddies, so we go over to the park,

130
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 and he was carrying this loaf of bread.

131
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 The deli sold bread, and it was just like

132
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 a regular loaf of white bread,

133
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 and we never sold the darn things.

134
00:05:05,880 --> 00:05:09,440
 We'd buy, we'd order one or two from the company.

135
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 They'd ship 'em out every morning,

136
00:05:10,840 --> 00:05:13,080
 and he's got it, it's in a plastic bag,

137
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 and he's got it in the crook of his arm,

138
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 and he's walking with this thing.

139
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 I'm like, "What are you doing with that loaf of bread?"

140
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 He opens the bag up, and he had cut the end of the bread off

141
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 and hollowed it out and stuffed a bottle of alcohol

142
00:05:24,160 --> 00:05:26,960
 down inside there that he stole from the Vendome Liquor Store.

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 I'm like, "Nice, that's a great idea."

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 And it was on.

145
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 We were drinking, and so then all of a sudden,

146
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 we only needed one or two pan breads before that,

147
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 but all of a sudden, we had to order five or six, you know?

148
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 And they never sold, and we would all be like, you know,

149
00:05:42,000 --> 00:05:44,980
 walking out with all these loaves of bread, you know,

150
00:05:44,980 --> 00:05:48,320
 that were hollowed out, and so we'd go shopping, right,

151
00:05:48,320 --> 00:05:49,840
 during our shift, and we'd be like,

152
00:05:49,840 --> 00:05:51,440
 "Okay, what do we wanna drink tonight?"

153
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 When we would drink all the good stuff,

154
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 'cause the price was right.

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 And so we'd just, man, it got to the point

156
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 where I was drinking an entire bottle of 750 ML in a night,

157
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 like in about three hours from Rome,

158
00:06:05,460 --> 00:06:07,880
 and riding my motorcycle at the time.

159
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 And I was a blackout drinker,

160
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 and I can't tell you how many times I'd wake up in bed

161
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 knowing the last thing I remember

162
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 was we were drinking at the park,

163
00:06:16,800 --> 00:06:19,760
 and jump up, and run out, and open the garage.

164
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 There's my motorcycle parked exactly

165
00:06:21,440 --> 00:06:23,280
 where it was supposed to be, on the Scrantz home,

166
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 and you'd think that would be enough, right,

167
00:06:26,120 --> 00:06:28,960
 to stop me, and okay, take a step back.

168
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 No, sometimes it would.

169
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 That would last six hours, and then I'd start up again, so.

170
00:06:33,440 --> 00:06:36,840
 Yeah, I mean, I would ride that motorcycle

171
00:06:36,840 --> 00:06:39,680
 like I was on the fast lane to hell.

172
00:06:39,680 --> 00:06:42,360
 I mean, it was, I didn't care where it went.

173
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 And there was one night, and the guys are telling me,

174
00:06:45,580 --> 00:06:47,680
 they're like, "Oh my God, you're so crazy."

175
00:06:47,680 --> 00:06:49,960
 The next day, they're like, "Here, you're insane."

176
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 I'm like, "What?"

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 'Cause I blacked out, I don't remember.

178
00:06:52,640 --> 00:06:54,680
 And they said, "You looked at us,

179
00:06:54,680 --> 00:06:56,200
 "and you looked over at us,

180
00:06:56,200 --> 00:06:59,580
 "and you've had this really strange look on your face,

181
00:06:59,580 --> 00:07:01,800
 "and you took off through the signal."

182
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 They were sitting at a light,

183
00:07:03,160 --> 00:07:04,620
 and I took off through the signal.

184
00:07:04,620 --> 00:07:06,320
 All the cars are slamming on the brakes,

185
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 and I, there I go.

186
00:07:07,400 --> 00:07:08,980
 And they said, "We didn't see you after that.

187
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 "You were wrong."

188
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 And I didn't even remember it.

189
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 And it was just, that was what I did.

190
00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:15,360
 That was how I partied, you know?

191
00:07:15,360 --> 00:07:18,740
 I just, and then while I was working at that deli,

192
00:07:18,740 --> 00:07:20,000
 you know, we'd go off and on,

193
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 and I'd slow my drinking down a little bit,

194
00:07:22,000 --> 00:07:22,920
 and pick it back up.

195
00:07:22,920 --> 00:07:25,400
 And then that same guy that hired me, Scott,

196
00:07:25,400 --> 00:07:26,940
 came in and said, "Hey, Kelly, come out here.

197
00:07:26,940 --> 00:07:28,840
 "I wanna introduce you to somebody."

198
00:07:28,840 --> 00:07:31,160
 And granted, I'm 18 years old at the time, right?

199
00:07:31,160 --> 00:07:33,440
 So he says, "Hey, this is Ralph.

200
00:07:33,440 --> 00:07:36,340
 "Ralph is the manager over at the TGI Fridays.

201
00:07:36,340 --> 00:07:37,740
 "And we've come to an agreement

202
00:07:37,740 --> 00:07:40,100
 "where his bartenders are gonna come in here,

203
00:07:40,100 --> 00:07:42,080
 "and we're gonna give them whatever they want.

204
00:07:42,080 --> 00:07:44,360
 "We go there, they're gonna give us whatever we want.

205
00:07:44,360 --> 00:07:45,800
 "And nobody's gonna pay for anything."

206
00:07:45,800 --> 00:07:47,560
 And I'm like, "That sounds like fair trade."

207
00:07:47,560 --> 00:07:50,000
 And so, I had to get a fake ID.

208
00:07:50,000 --> 00:07:52,840
 So I went to my buddy's, and he, his brother

209
00:07:52,840 --> 00:07:55,160
 was getting rid of his ID 'cause it expired.

210
00:07:55,160 --> 00:07:57,800
 And I didn't, I kinda looked like him, but I didn't really.

211
00:07:57,800 --> 00:07:59,760
 And he had, he had a mustache.

212
00:07:59,760 --> 00:08:02,560
 And I had the, you know, the peach fuzz mustache back then.

213
00:08:02,560 --> 00:08:04,720
 And I'm looking at it, and I'm like,

214
00:08:04,720 --> 00:08:06,700
 "That's probably not gonna fly."

215
00:08:06,700 --> 00:08:09,860
 So I'm like, "How do I look closer to what he looks like?"

216
00:08:09,860 --> 00:08:12,280
 And I noticed that his mustache was much darker.

217
00:08:12,280 --> 00:08:15,800
 So I went in, and I stole my sister's eyebrow pencil,

218
00:08:15,800 --> 00:08:18,560
 and I'm sitting there, and I'm darkening my eye,

219
00:08:18,560 --> 00:08:21,600
 my mustache, and I'm like, "That's better," you know?

220
00:08:21,600 --> 00:08:23,280
 And so, that got me in.

221
00:08:23,280 --> 00:08:24,640
 After a while, they stopped guarding me

222
00:08:24,640 --> 00:08:26,720
 'cause I was right in there, so.

223
00:08:26,720 --> 00:08:29,280
 But man, we would drink there, and it was the new shoe park.

224
00:08:29,280 --> 00:08:31,720
 We were there every night on the weekends drinking.

225
00:08:31,720 --> 00:08:34,840
 But one time, back in the day, you know,

226
00:08:34,840 --> 00:08:36,800
 other substances were very popular.

227
00:08:36,800 --> 00:08:40,200
 And I bought a big bag of mushrooms.

228
00:08:40,200 --> 00:08:41,400
 And we ate those mushrooms,

229
00:08:41,400 --> 00:08:42,840
 and then we went to the bar drinking.

230
00:08:42,840 --> 00:08:45,680
 And they always mix the drinks pretty strong.

231
00:08:45,680 --> 00:08:48,360
 But I always tell 'em I want a Stoli Pink Lemonade,

232
00:08:48,360 --> 00:08:49,600
 waterproof Stoli, right?

233
00:08:49,600 --> 00:08:52,800
 And I'm drinking those things, and I couldn't feel 'em.

234
00:08:52,800 --> 00:08:55,400
 I literally could not feel the alcohol.

235
00:08:55,400 --> 00:08:58,000
 And I'm like, "What's the matter with you?

236
00:08:58,000 --> 00:09:01,320
 "Your hand's damaged, you can't pour more vodka in there?"

237
00:09:01,320 --> 00:09:03,440
 And he was pouring, in a big glass,

238
00:09:03,440 --> 00:09:04,840
 three quarters of his vodka.

239
00:09:04,840 --> 00:09:07,360
 And I was drinking my walk, and I couldn't feel it.

240
00:09:07,360 --> 00:09:09,200
 And I'm like, "You know what, let's get outta here.

241
00:09:09,200 --> 00:09:10,080
 "Let's go somewhere else."

242
00:09:10,080 --> 00:09:11,760
 So now, we decide to start bar hopping.

243
00:09:11,760 --> 00:09:16,360
 So we're bar hopping, and I was the designated drunk driver.

244
00:09:16,360 --> 00:09:19,480
 And I used to drive a '72 Cadillac Coupe de Ville.

245
00:09:19,480 --> 00:09:21,920
 That thing's got, like, a couch in the backseat.

246
00:09:21,920 --> 00:09:25,880
 And it's literally four, six feet wide inside the car.

247
00:09:25,880 --> 00:09:28,800
 And so, I'm driving that car, and they used to say,

248
00:09:28,800 --> 00:09:30,440
 "Hey, you driving?"

249
00:09:30,440 --> 00:09:32,560
 And I said, "You guys pay for gas, and I'll drive."

250
00:09:32,560 --> 00:09:33,760
 And so, we drove.

251
00:09:33,760 --> 00:09:36,680
 And because I grew up here, back then,

252
00:09:36,680 --> 00:09:38,480
 when the cops pulled out of West Family Hall,

253
00:09:38,480 --> 00:09:39,720
 they wouldn't turn left.

254
00:09:39,720 --> 00:09:41,760
 They wouldn't go down into Canoga Park,

255
00:09:41,760 --> 00:09:43,880
 and Woodland Hills, West Hills area.

256
00:09:43,880 --> 00:09:46,280
 They would come this way, towards the feeder.

257
00:09:46,280 --> 00:09:48,160
 They never went that way, 'til they were called.

258
00:09:48,160 --> 00:09:50,960
 And the neighbors were fed up with our shit, our strength.

259
00:09:50,960 --> 00:09:53,760
 So they called, they were coming and looking for us.

260
00:09:53,760 --> 00:09:56,920
 So we had a thing where I would pull up at a spot.

261
00:09:56,920 --> 00:09:59,360
 We had about, I had about 15 spots all over.

262
00:09:59,360 --> 00:10:01,600
 And we'd pull up, and I'd look at the clock,

263
00:10:01,600 --> 00:10:02,800
 see what time it was.

264
00:10:02,800 --> 00:10:04,840
 And 15 minutes later, we were gone.

265
00:10:04,840 --> 00:10:07,560
 We'd just drink there, party there, do our thing,

266
00:10:07,560 --> 00:10:09,920
 and then we'd leave, before the cops could show me.

267
00:10:09,920 --> 00:10:11,880
 So we were always bouncing around all over town.

268
00:10:11,880 --> 00:10:14,480
 So we're out drinking at TGI Fridays,

269
00:10:14,480 --> 00:10:16,280
 drinking pink lemonades, can't feel 'em.

270
00:10:16,280 --> 00:10:19,480
 And I decide, okay, it's time, let's go, let's go bar hop.

271
00:10:19,480 --> 00:10:20,560
 So we go bar hopping.

272
00:10:20,560 --> 00:10:21,920
 We end up out in Nagora.

273
00:10:21,920 --> 00:10:24,480
 And we're out in Nagora, and we're drinking,

274
00:10:24,480 --> 00:10:26,800
 and all of a sudden, guess what started wearing off,

275
00:10:26,800 --> 00:10:28,160
 and what started kicking in.

276
00:10:28,160 --> 00:10:31,280
 And I'm like, I'm stumbling, and I'm like, okay.

277
00:10:31,280 --> 00:10:32,360
 And I go to my friends, I'm like,

278
00:10:32,360 --> 00:10:33,760
 if you guys are in the car,

279
00:10:33,760 --> 00:10:35,360
 when I put the key in the ignition,

280
00:10:35,360 --> 00:10:37,000
 you'll get a ride home, otherwise you'll walk.

281
00:10:37,000 --> 00:10:39,120
 And I get in the car, and they were all there,

282
00:10:39,120 --> 00:10:40,560
 and everybody jumped in.

283
00:10:40,560 --> 00:10:42,520
 And I start the car, and I take off.

284
00:10:42,520 --> 00:10:46,080
 And I'm now, I can feel all the out that I drank all night.

285
00:10:46,080 --> 00:10:47,880
 And I'm like, oh, this is not good.

286
00:10:47,880 --> 00:10:50,440
 So I'm driving down the 101, I'm coming this way.

287
00:10:50,440 --> 00:10:51,480
 I don't know if you guys are familiar

288
00:10:51,480 --> 00:10:52,640
 with that Fallbrook off-ramp.

289
00:10:52,640 --> 00:10:55,520
 It comes down, and it makes that super tight turn.

290
00:10:55,520 --> 00:10:56,940
 It's like 15 miles an hour.

291
00:10:56,940 --> 00:11:00,000
 So you gotta go from 70 to 15, and 500 feet.

292
00:11:00,000 --> 00:11:03,760
 And I'm falling asleep, and like looking at them,

293
00:11:03,760 --> 00:11:06,160
 like wake up, man, I'm rolling down all the windows.

294
00:11:06,160 --> 00:11:07,200
 I'm yelling at all the guys,

295
00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:08,720
 keep me up, keep me awake, man.

296
00:11:08,720 --> 00:11:11,680
 And I'm looking back there, and they're sleeping,

297
00:11:11,680 --> 00:11:14,220
 jerking the wheel like this, you know.

298
00:11:14,220 --> 00:11:15,720
 Whoa, whoa, and then they wake up,

299
00:11:15,720 --> 00:11:17,800
 and then two minutes later, they're all sleeping.

300
00:11:17,800 --> 00:11:20,040
 And I'm like, oh, all right, I could get here.

301
00:11:20,040 --> 00:11:21,400
 I'm almost home, I'm almost home.

302
00:11:21,400 --> 00:11:24,640
 And I see, oh, Fallbrook, oh, here we go,

303
00:11:24,640 --> 00:11:25,480
 here's my off-ramp.

304
00:11:25,480 --> 00:11:27,880
 Fell asleep on the off-ramp, coming off the freeway,

305
00:11:27,880 --> 00:11:29,400
 driving that Cadillac.

306
00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:31,400
 Well, this was like a horror movie,

307
00:11:31,400 --> 00:11:34,240
 'cause I woke up, and sparks are coming off.

308
00:11:34,240 --> 00:11:36,000
 I went into the guardrail.

309
00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:38,640
 I didn't hit it straight on, I hit it, side-swiped it.

310
00:11:38,640 --> 00:11:41,520
 And sparks are flying off that guardrail,

311
00:11:41,520 --> 00:11:43,320
 and I'm like, holy, holy shit.

312
00:11:43,320 --> 00:11:46,360
 And I'm like, oh, no, and I can see the turn coming up.

313
00:11:46,360 --> 00:11:49,760
 And I cranked the wheel, and I didn't even bother

314
00:11:49,760 --> 00:11:52,040
 to try to stop for the stop sign, and I just kept going.

315
00:11:52,040 --> 00:11:53,880
 And I'm like, oh, my God, oh, my God.

316
00:11:53,880 --> 00:11:56,120
 And now the adrenaline's pumping, and I turn around looking,

317
00:11:56,120 --> 00:11:57,760
 and everybody's awake now, you know?

318
00:11:57,760 --> 00:12:00,760
 I was like, oh, wow, you guys finally decided to wake up.

319
00:12:00,760 --> 00:12:03,720
 And I went back there, and that Cadillac

320
00:12:03,720 --> 00:12:05,200
 took out 20 feet of guardrail.

321
00:12:05,200 --> 00:12:07,320
 I just snapped all those pieces off.

322
00:12:07,320 --> 00:12:09,360
 And I didn't hit it straight on, fortunately.

323
00:12:09,360 --> 00:12:12,520
 I side-swiped it, but man, that thing just destroyed

324
00:12:12,520 --> 00:12:14,640
 that car, and the car was almost indestructible.

325
00:12:14,640 --> 00:12:17,840
 And then it just got to be, you know, just, that was normal.

326
00:12:17,840 --> 00:12:19,840
 You know, that was like normal behavior.

327
00:12:19,840 --> 00:12:24,400
 And then I was out Christmas Day, 1989,

328
00:12:24,400 --> 00:12:27,600
 and it was pouring rain, and I had just got a new car.

329
00:12:27,600 --> 00:12:29,920
 And I decided, well, what do you do with a new car?

330
00:12:29,920 --> 00:12:32,760
 You see how fishtail's in the rain, right?

331
00:12:32,760 --> 00:12:33,760
 That's what we did, right?

332
00:12:33,760 --> 00:12:36,720
 So you have to learn, in case it happens, you know,

333
00:12:36,720 --> 00:12:38,960
 I'm justifying all this craziness in my head.

334
00:12:38,960 --> 00:12:41,400
 And so I go out, and I'm out there trying to get this thing

335
00:12:41,400 --> 00:12:44,160
 to fishtail, and it's got front-wheel drive,

336
00:12:44,160 --> 00:12:45,200
 and it won't fishtail.

337
00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:46,600
 And that's the last thing I remember.

338
00:12:46,600 --> 00:12:49,400
 I wake up in bed, and I run out to the car,

339
00:12:49,400 --> 00:12:52,360
 and I'm looking for body parts hanging off the car,

340
00:12:52,360 --> 00:12:55,560
 limbs, or what have you, damage, nothing.

341
00:12:55,560 --> 00:12:59,640
 And I told myself, you know what, that's it, I'm done.

342
00:12:59,640 --> 00:13:00,640
 I'm not drinking anymore.

343
00:13:00,640 --> 00:13:03,960
 And I had been introduced to AA before.

344
00:13:03,960 --> 00:13:06,800
 When I was 18, I got my first DUI,

345
00:13:06,800 --> 00:13:09,340
 and so I had gone to AA a bit.

346
00:13:09,340 --> 00:13:12,240
 But when I quit in '89, I never went to a single meeting.

347
00:13:12,240 --> 00:13:13,080
 I just stopped.

348
00:13:13,080 --> 00:13:16,720
 And my girlfriend at the time, that ended up being my wife,

349
00:13:16,720 --> 00:13:19,160
 that we were married for 16 years,

350
00:13:19,160 --> 00:13:21,340
 and I was with her for like 18 years.

351
00:13:21,340 --> 00:13:24,000
 I didn't drink for 18 years, through the whole marriage,

352
00:13:24,000 --> 00:13:26,280
 through the whole divorce, nothing.

353
00:13:26,280 --> 00:13:29,200
 And it was one of those real fun divorces, so.

354
00:13:29,200 --> 00:13:31,920
 And then, after all, everything was settled,

355
00:13:31,920 --> 00:13:33,960
 and everything was finalized,

356
00:13:33,960 --> 00:13:36,880
 and the kids were coming over on a regular basis.

357
00:13:36,880 --> 00:13:38,480
 My alcohols kicked in.

358
00:13:38,480 --> 00:13:40,600
 And it had been working out over at the gym

359
00:13:40,600 --> 00:13:41,800
 for the last 18 years.

360
00:13:41,800 --> 00:13:43,560
 It was ready to go, and it's like,

361
00:13:43,560 --> 00:13:45,560
 hey, buddy, how you doing, you know?

362
00:13:45,560 --> 00:13:48,160
 Remember me, remember all that fun we used to have?

363
00:13:48,160 --> 00:13:50,120
 And so I told myself, well, you know,

364
00:13:50,120 --> 00:13:52,600
 I've got pretty good self-control.

365
00:13:52,600 --> 00:13:54,160
 I stopped for 18 years.

366
00:13:54,160 --> 00:13:56,600
 So if I can keep it under control,

367
00:13:56,600 --> 00:13:58,520
 famous last words from an alcoholic, right?

368
00:13:58,520 --> 00:14:01,280
 If I can keep it under control, I can drink.

369
00:14:01,280 --> 00:14:03,840
 So I told myself, I'll only drink Friday night,

370
00:14:03,840 --> 00:14:04,660
 and that's it.

371
00:14:04,660 --> 00:14:06,240
 Three beers, and that's it.

372
00:14:06,240 --> 00:14:07,520
 And I did that for a year.

373
00:14:07,520 --> 00:14:10,000
 And then it got to be where, well,

374
00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:12,720
 I don't have a project I'm working on, you know,

375
00:14:12,720 --> 00:14:15,720
 Monday, not starting 'til Tuesday or Wednesday,

376
00:14:15,720 --> 00:14:17,840
 so, you know, it's Saturday.

377
00:14:17,840 --> 00:14:20,080
 It's still the weekend, and then it went from there.

378
00:14:20,080 --> 00:14:22,320
 And in a very short period of time,

379
00:14:22,320 --> 00:14:26,200
 I went from having a nice place out in Encino,

380
00:14:26,200 --> 00:14:28,720
 and the kids were coming over all the time,

381
00:14:28,720 --> 00:14:31,360
 and I just threw that all away.

382
00:14:31,360 --> 00:14:34,640
 I remember it was my weekend to have the kids over,

383
00:14:34,640 --> 00:14:36,700
 and I'd been drinking all week

384
00:14:36,700 --> 00:14:37,880
 'cause I didn't have anything to do,

385
00:14:37,880 --> 00:14:40,280
 and I was just hammered by the time

386
00:14:40,280 --> 00:14:41,280
 they were supposed to come over.

387
00:14:41,280 --> 00:14:42,840
 And I was supposed to go pick 'em up,

388
00:14:42,840 --> 00:14:44,560
 and there was no way I could drive out there

389
00:14:44,560 --> 00:14:46,000
 and I was like, there was no way.

390
00:14:46,000 --> 00:14:48,320
 And so I call up and I say, "Hey, I'm not coming."

391
00:14:48,320 --> 00:14:50,920
 And I remember my son getting on the phone.

392
00:14:50,920 --> 00:14:53,560
 He was 10 years old at the time, and he's crying.

393
00:14:53,560 --> 00:14:55,300
 "No, please, Dad, I wanna see you.

394
00:14:55,300 --> 00:14:56,680
 "I want you to come get us."

395
00:14:56,680 --> 00:14:58,280
 And I said, "No," and I didn't care

396
00:14:58,280 --> 00:15:01,000
 because alcohol was more important to me than my own son.

397
00:15:01,000 --> 00:15:02,640
 And then after I got off the phone,

398
00:15:02,640 --> 00:15:05,640
 I started realizing that I crushed him,

399
00:15:05,640 --> 00:15:08,560
 so I just started drinking more to numb those feelings.

400
00:15:08,560 --> 00:15:10,440
 And that lasted for about a year and a half,

401
00:15:10,440 --> 00:15:12,400
 and I drank myself out of house and home.

402
00:15:12,400 --> 00:15:15,680
 And in the process of drinking myself out of house and home,

403
00:15:15,680 --> 00:15:19,120
 I would go to, I lived in Encino up there

404
00:15:19,120 --> 00:15:22,520
 near White Oak in Ventura, right off the arm.

405
00:15:22,520 --> 00:15:24,880
 And they had some pretty good-sized,

406
00:15:24,880 --> 00:15:26,640
 older properties in that neighborhood.

407
00:15:26,640 --> 00:15:29,960
 You had pretty good square footage in your unit.

408
00:15:29,960 --> 00:15:31,820
 So when I started drinking, I'm like,

409
00:15:31,820 --> 00:15:34,400
 "Well, you know, I gotta be smart about this.

410
00:15:34,400 --> 00:15:36,580
 "I gotta buy alcohol when it's on sale, right?"

411
00:15:36,580 --> 00:15:39,200
 So I'd look at the Rite Aid ad and I'm like,

412
00:15:39,200 --> 00:15:43,320
 "Oh, look at that, Heineken 12-packs on sale for $9.99.

413
00:15:43,320 --> 00:15:44,320
 "I should go get some."

414
00:15:44,320 --> 00:15:46,280
 Well, back then, I was working in construction,

415
00:15:46,280 --> 00:15:47,320
 so I had a big truck.

416
00:15:47,320 --> 00:15:48,760
 So I drove my truck over there

417
00:15:48,760 --> 00:15:50,800
 and I threw the dolly in the back.

418
00:15:50,800 --> 00:15:53,360
 And I went in to the store,

419
00:15:53,360 --> 00:15:55,200
 and the first time I went in there,

420
00:15:55,200 --> 00:15:56,600
 I used the Rite Aid cart.

421
00:15:56,600 --> 00:15:58,200
 And those carts are really tiny.

422
00:15:58,200 --> 00:16:01,080
 They're all like 12-packs of Heineken.

423
00:16:01,080 --> 00:16:03,520
 So I was like, "This is just not a day in the life."

424
00:16:03,520 --> 00:16:05,080
 So next door was the Ralph's.

425
00:16:05,080 --> 00:16:06,640
 So then when I would go back,

426
00:16:06,640 --> 00:16:08,920
 I would grab two Ralph's shopping carts,

427
00:16:08,920 --> 00:16:10,560
 push it around and put it around behind me.

428
00:16:10,560 --> 00:16:12,640
 And I'm like, "Okay, I'm going into the store

429
00:16:12,640 --> 00:16:14,280
 "to get some beer," right?

430
00:16:14,280 --> 00:16:17,440
 And I just start loading those carts, loading those carts.

431
00:16:17,440 --> 00:16:19,520
 And I'm pushing them out to my truck,

432
00:16:19,520 --> 00:16:23,760
 and I've got two full carts and 20 cases of beer,

433
00:16:23,760 --> 00:16:25,320
 and I'm throwing them out there.

434
00:16:25,320 --> 00:16:26,640
 And some guy's walking in, he's like,

435
00:16:26,640 --> 00:16:28,200
 "Oh, are you having a party?"

436
00:16:28,200 --> 00:16:30,760
 And I'm like, "No, man, that's not for me.

437
00:16:30,760 --> 00:16:31,680
 "What are you talking about?"

438
00:16:31,680 --> 00:16:34,960
 And so I'd fill the truck, and I'd take it back,

439
00:16:34,960 --> 00:16:36,040
 and I'd take the dolly,

440
00:16:36,040 --> 00:16:38,120
 and I looked like a beer delivery guy.

441
00:16:38,120 --> 00:16:40,680
 I mean, I would go from my truck into my apartment,

442
00:16:40,680 --> 00:16:41,880
 my truck into my apartment,

443
00:16:41,880 --> 00:16:43,720
 and I'm back and forth and back and forth,

444
00:16:43,720 --> 00:16:46,080
 and the neighbors are like, "The heck is this guy doing?"

445
00:16:46,080 --> 00:16:48,320
 And I would just, and I'd load them up,

446
00:16:48,320 --> 00:16:49,160
 and I'm like, "Okay,"

447
00:16:49,160 --> 00:16:52,640
 and I got this special refrigerator that had a lock on it.

448
00:16:52,640 --> 00:16:53,800
 So when the kids came over,

449
00:16:53,800 --> 00:16:55,880
 they couldn't see what was in the refrigerator,

450
00:16:55,880 --> 00:16:57,360
 but I wanted to keep the beer cold, right?

451
00:16:57,360 --> 00:17:00,080
 So I had a little key on there, and it was full.

452
00:17:00,080 --> 00:17:02,600
 It was a pretty good size refrigerator, and it was full.

453
00:17:02,600 --> 00:17:03,620
 And then I'm like,

454
00:17:03,620 --> 00:17:05,160
 "Well, where am I gonna put the rest of this beer?"

455
00:17:05,160 --> 00:17:06,760
 So I started putting it in my closet.

456
00:17:06,760 --> 00:17:09,200
 I had a big closet that stressed wall-to-wall.

457
00:17:09,200 --> 00:17:10,940
 I'm stacking it all in there, and I'm like,

458
00:17:10,940 --> 00:17:12,280
 "Well, I don't wanna put too much in there

459
00:17:12,280 --> 00:17:13,440
 "'cause it's kinda heavy."

460
00:17:13,440 --> 00:17:14,960
 "Well, there's a space here behind the door.

461
00:17:14,960 --> 00:17:15,960
 "I'll just put it there."

462
00:17:15,960 --> 00:17:17,320
 So then I started putting it there,

463
00:17:17,320 --> 00:17:20,600
 but then I keep going back to the store and picking up new.

464
00:17:20,600 --> 00:17:22,880
 I mean, I went one time to the store,

465
00:17:22,880 --> 00:17:25,600
 and I got 20 cases, and I went back and got 20 more.

466
00:17:25,600 --> 00:17:27,100
 And I had beer stacked up.

467
00:17:27,100 --> 00:17:29,560
 It was probably five feet tall, the size of a pallet.

468
00:17:29,560 --> 00:17:31,760
 And I'm like, "Well, how am I gonna find this beer?"

469
00:17:31,760 --> 00:17:32,800
 Kids coming in my room.

470
00:17:32,800 --> 00:17:35,160
 I'll just put a sheet over that.

471
00:17:35,160 --> 00:17:37,340
 So I'd throw a bed sheet over it.

472
00:17:37,340 --> 00:17:40,480
 And I must've had, and then not to mention that stack,

473
00:17:40,480 --> 00:17:43,640
 I put all the beer inside the closet and the refrigerator

474
00:17:43,640 --> 00:17:44,480
 that was full.

475
00:17:44,480 --> 00:17:45,320
 And this for a guy that's supposed

476
00:17:45,320 --> 00:17:46,640
 to drink three beers a week, right?

477
00:17:46,640 --> 00:17:48,760
 So it was just insanity.

478
00:17:48,760 --> 00:17:50,060
 It's the only way to describe it.

479
00:17:50,060 --> 00:17:53,200
 But in my alcoholic mind, that was okay

480
00:17:53,200 --> 00:17:55,000
 'cause I was saving money, right?

481
00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:56,400
 You know, and buying that much.

482
00:17:56,400 --> 00:17:58,680
 And then when you have that much beer laying around,

483
00:17:58,680 --> 00:18:00,480
 it's like, well, you need a few more.

484
00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:03,000
 And then that lasted about a year and a half.

485
00:18:03,000 --> 00:18:06,720
 And then I ended up, I got caught up in that 2008.

486
00:18:06,720 --> 00:18:10,400
 I was a contractor back then, a 2008 housing crash.

487
00:18:10,400 --> 00:18:13,360
 And all the business was gone, literally.

488
00:18:13,360 --> 00:18:16,600
 And I didn't care 'cause I had stockpiled a bunch of cash

489
00:18:16,600 --> 00:18:18,520
 and I just proceeded to drink more.

490
00:18:18,520 --> 00:18:22,720
 And then eventually I stopped paying the rent and I was out.

491
00:18:22,720 --> 00:18:24,520
 And then I was staying with a friend

492
00:18:24,520 --> 00:18:25,840
 and I was over there at their house

493
00:18:25,840 --> 00:18:27,560
 and I was digging around in their house.

494
00:18:27,560 --> 00:18:29,760
 They were at work, I should have been at work, but I wasn't.

495
00:18:29,760 --> 00:18:32,040
 And I'm digging around in their house and I'm thinking,

496
00:18:32,040 --> 00:18:32,880
 "Where?"

497
00:18:32,880 --> 00:18:35,120
 They gotta get some alcohol or something, right?

498
00:18:35,120 --> 00:18:37,160
 And they just opened this one cabinet

499
00:18:37,160 --> 00:18:39,360
 on the top shelf in the back.

500
00:18:39,360 --> 00:18:42,720
 There was the hard stuff, but I didn't usually drink that,

501
00:18:42,720 --> 00:18:44,280
 but I didn't know, right?

502
00:18:44,280 --> 00:18:46,680
 So they pull it out and it was the good stuff.

503
00:18:46,680 --> 00:18:49,000
 It had the plain label with the blue stripe

504
00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:50,200
 and it said tequila.

505
00:18:50,200 --> 00:18:51,200
 I'm like, "That'll work."

506
00:18:51,200 --> 00:18:53,560
 So I started drinking that and I black out again.

507
00:18:53,560 --> 00:18:56,520
 And I come to and my friends that are sitting on the couch

508
00:18:56,520 --> 00:18:59,480
 and they're looking like, man, like really concerned,

509
00:18:59,480 --> 00:19:00,960
 like what the hell is going on?

510
00:19:00,960 --> 00:19:04,320
 And turned out that I was puking my guts out

511
00:19:04,320 --> 00:19:06,520
 when they got home and then I went and passed out

512
00:19:06,520 --> 00:19:09,440
 and then came out and they come out and I stumble out

513
00:19:09,440 --> 00:19:11,760
 and I'm thinking, "Oh man, I got a headache now.

514
00:19:11,760 --> 00:19:13,600
 I gotta drink some alcohol."

515
00:19:13,600 --> 00:19:15,840
 And so there's no more alcohol 'cause I drank it all,

516
00:19:15,840 --> 00:19:17,400
 but they had a couple of bottles of wine

517
00:19:17,400 --> 00:19:19,040
 and I'm like, "Let me drink one of those."

518
00:19:19,040 --> 00:19:20,040
 And they looked at me and they said,

519
00:19:20,040 --> 00:19:21,960
 "You know, you might have a problem with alcohol."

520
00:19:21,960 --> 00:19:24,800
 And I said, "Well, I don't think so, but it's your place,

521
00:19:24,800 --> 00:19:26,160
 so I guess you're making the rules."

522
00:19:26,160 --> 00:19:30,720
 So that night I went to the rafters out in Santa Clarita.

523
00:19:30,720 --> 00:19:32,640
 I mean, anybody of you who've ever been there,

524
00:19:32,640 --> 00:19:34,160
 there's a big flight of stairs

525
00:19:34,160 --> 00:19:36,080
 that leads up to the rafters, the rafter hole.

526
00:19:36,080 --> 00:19:39,600
 It's a big, wide set of stairs, probably five, six feet wide

527
00:19:39,600 --> 00:19:41,040
 and it goes all the way up there.

528
00:19:41,040 --> 00:19:42,960
 And then as I'm walking up there

529
00:19:42,960 --> 00:19:45,320
 and going to park in the parking lot,

530
00:19:45,320 --> 00:19:48,040
 a little voice in my head, little alcoholic voices saying,

531
00:19:48,040 --> 00:19:50,360
 "Don't go there, just lie to him, tell him you went.

532
00:19:50,360 --> 00:19:51,880
 Just say, 'Oh, I went, I went.'"

533
00:19:51,880 --> 00:19:54,360
 And for some reason my body wasn't listening

534
00:19:54,360 --> 00:19:56,760
 and I just kept, I parked the car, I got out,

535
00:19:56,760 --> 00:20:00,160
 I went up there and it started getting louder and louder

536
00:20:00,160 --> 00:20:02,200
 and louder as I'm getting closer and closer.

537
00:20:02,200 --> 00:20:04,520
 And it's screaming at me, "Don't go up the stairs,

538
00:20:04,520 --> 00:20:05,480
 don't go up the stairs."

539
00:20:05,480 --> 00:20:08,480
 And then I just kept, I was like, "I'm on a plane."

540
00:20:08,480 --> 00:20:10,600
 And I started walking up those stairs

541
00:20:10,600 --> 00:20:12,080
 and I get up halfway up

542
00:20:12,080 --> 00:20:13,960
 and I can see the top of the landing now.

543
00:20:13,960 --> 00:20:17,000
 And now the voice is just screaming stuff,

544
00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:18,840
 "Go the other way, go the other way."

545
00:20:18,840 --> 00:20:21,040
 And I turned around and I looked down the stairs

546
00:20:21,040 --> 00:20:23,280
 and it was the most bizarre thing.

547
00:20:23,280 --> 00:20:25,120
 The stairs, even though I was like right about

548
00:20:25,120 --> 00:20:26,320
 in the middle of the staircase,

549
00:20:26,320 --> 00:20:29,040
 the stairs going down looked like they didn't stop.

550
00:20:29,040 --> 00:20:31,080
 Like, "Whoa, I think it's shorter this way."

551
00:20:31,080 --> 00:20:32,880
 So I went and turned to my first meeting

552
00:20:32,880 --> 00:20:34,160
 and I went into that room

553
00:20:34,160 --> 00:20:36,040
 and fortunately it was a small meeting.

554
00:20:36,040 --> 00:20:37,640
 I was sitting off to the side, you know,

555
00:20:37,640 --> 00:20:39,720
 "Don't talk to me, don't look at me,

556
00:20:39,720 --> 00:20:41,400
 don't make eye contact with me."

557
00:20:41,400 --> 00:20:44,680
 And I'm sitting there and I find myself a seat

558
00:20:44,680 --> 00:20:46,240
 and I started looking around and, you know,

559
00:20:46,240 --> 00:20:47,720
 you got all this stuff, right?

560
00:20:47,720 --> 00:20:50,040
 And I sit down and right directly in front of me

561
00:20:50,040 --> 00:20:52,360
 was the promises and I'm like, "Okay."

562
00:20:52,360 --> 00:20:54,920
 So I started reading them and I get to number four

563
00:20:54,920 --> 00:20:56,200
 and we will know peace.

564
00:20:56,200 --> 00:20:57,560
 And that was it, I lost it.

565
00:20:57,560 --> 00:21:01,040
 I started sobbing because at that point in my life,

566
00:21:01,040 --> 00:21:02,880
 I had no peace.

567
00:21:02,880 --> 00:21:05,320
 And so I'm sitting there and my head's spinning

568
00:21:05,320 --> 00:21:08,320
 100 miles an hour and I'm thinking to myself,

569
00:21:08,320 --> 00:21:11,800
 "Okay, if I can get that one thing from this program,

570
00:21:11,800 --> 00:21:12,640
 then I'll stay.

571
00:21:12,640 --> 00:21:14,200
 But if I can't get peace, then I'm not gonna stay."

572
00:21:14,200 --> 00:21:16,040
 And today, I have peace in my life.

573
00:21:16,040 --> 00:21:18,920
 You know, I have the normal, you know,

574
00:21:18,920 --> 00:21:21,560
 life's inception type of stuff, you know.

575
00:21:21,560 --> 00:21:23,040
 They're quality problems.

576
00:21:23,040 --> 00:21:24,880
 I mean, if I told you what the problems were,

577
00:21:24,880 --> 00:21:27,680
 you'd be like, "Really, that's your problem?"

578
00:21:27,680 --> 00:21:28,960
 You know, and it's funny.

579
00:21:28,960 --> 00:21:30,840
 David asked me, he's like, "How you doing?"

580
00:21:30,840 --> 00:21:31,920
 You know, I love everything.

581
00:21:31,920 --> 00:21:35,560
 I said, "It's good, you know, nothing to complain about."

582
00:21:35,560 --> 00:21:37,960
 And it's been a road.

583
00:21:37,960 --> 00:21:38,800
 It's been a road.

584
00:21:38,800 --> 00:21:42,080
 It was when I first started it, you know, staying sober.

585
00:21:42,080 --> 00:21:43,800
 And I really wanted to stay sober this time.

586
00:21:43,800 --> 00:21:48,120
 And I was sitting at home, you know, working still.

587
00:21:48,120 --> 00:21:51,640
 And I was collecting unemployment at the time.

588
00:21:51,640 --> 00:21:53,280
 So I had a little money coming in.

589
00:21:53,280 --> 00:21:55,360
 This thing starts up again.

590
00:21:55,360 --> 00:21:56,520
 There it goes again.

591
00:21:56,520 --> 00:21:58,480
 It's like, "Hey, man, there's a liquor store

592
00:21:58,480 --> 00:21:59,440
 right down there."

593
00:21:59,440 --> 00:22:01,760
 And I'm like, "No, I really wanna do that."

594
00:22:01,760 --> 00:22:04,040
 And the more I said no, the longer it got.

595
00:22:04,040 --> 00:22:06,040
 And I'm like, "Okay, wait a minute."

596
00:22:06,040 --> 00:22:09,040
 I went to that meeting, where's that phone list?

597
00:22:09,040 --> 00:22:09,880
 I see the phone list.

598
00:22:09,880 --> 00:22:11,920
 And I remember the guys told me, "Call me anytime."

599
00:22:11,920 --> 00:22:12,760
 I'm like, "Okay."

600
00:22:12,760 --> 00:22:14,320
 So I start making phone calls.

601
00:22:14,320 --> 00:22:16,400
 Voice, man, no hands, voice, man, voice, man,

602
00:22:16,400 --> 00:22:18,680
 no hands, no hands, went through like 20 months.

603
00:22:18,680 --> 00:22:19,520
 I'm like, "You know what?

604
00:22:19,520 --> 00:22:20,400
 Can't use profanity here."

605
00:22:20,400 --> 00:22:21,760
 So you know what I was thinking, right?

606
00:22:21,760 --> 00:22:22,840
 And I'm like, "That's it."

607
00:22:22,840 --> 00:22:24,640
 So I go and I get my shoes

608
00:22:24,640 --> 00:22:26,440
 and I start putting my shoes on.

609
00:22:26,440 --> 00:22:29,400
 And I put them both on and I got one tonic

610
00:22:29,400 --> 00:22:30,920
 and the phone starts blowing up.

611
00:22:30,920 --> 00:22:32,640
 And it's everybody that I called.

612
00:22:32,640 --> 00:22:33,480
 Like, "Hey man, what's going on?

613
00:22:33,480 --> 00:22:34,320
 You okay? What's up?"

614
00:22:34,320 --> 00:22:37,480
 And it was just constant and the numbers get...

615
00:22:37,480 --> 00:22:39,800
 And then I was on the phone and the phone rang

616
00:22:39,800 --> 00:22:42,160
 and that one went to voicemail and then they'd call back.

617
00:22:42,160 --> 00:22:44,400
 So all these 20 people are calling me back

618
00:22:44,400 --> 00:22:47,600
 and I'm like, "And now I'm making phone calls

619
00:22:47,600 --> 00:22:49,400
 or return calls and all this."

620
00:22:49,400 --> 00:22:52,080
 And then after it kind of calmed down a little bit,

621
00:22:52,080 --> 00:22:55,240
 I looked down at my feet and I'm looking at my feet

622
00:22:55,240 --> 00:22:56,200
 and I'm sitting in the chair

623
00:22:56,200 --> 00:22:57,560
 and only one of my shoes was tied.

624
00:22:57,560 --> 00:22:58,520
 I'm like, "It's kind of cool."

625
00:22:58,520 --> 00:23:00,720
 But the obsession was gone to go get the alcohol,

626
00:23:00,720 --> 00:23:02,760
 which was the most bizarre thing to me.

627
00:23:02,760 --> 00:23:04,680
 I'm like, "That's pretty awesome."

628
00:23:04,680 --> 00:23:07,640
 And so that's why I do that fullness.

629
00:23:07,640 --> 00:23:12,000
 I did it for years and I just gave it up to another guy.

630
00:23:12,000 --> 00:23:13,200
 I did it for the last two years

631
00:23:13,200 --> 00:23:15,720
 and that fullness saved my life.

632
00:23:15,720 --> 00:23:17,480
 It literally saved my life.

633
00:23:17,480 --> 00:23:21,600
 And the only way I stopped drinking this go round

634
00:23:21,600 --> 00:23:24,480
 was the men and women in the room for alcoholics and homeless.

635
00:23:24,480 --> 00:23:26,920
 I mean, my brain is trying to kill me

636
00:23:26,920 --> 00:23:29,240
 with alcohol and drugs, without my consent.

637
00:23:29,240 --> 00:23:30,640
 And it'll do it if I let it.

638
00:23:30,640 --> 00:23:33,160
 But when I come into the rooms and alcoholics anonymous,

639
00:23:33,160 --> 00:23:34,720
 I feel peace.

640
00:23:34,720 --> 00:23:36,440
 That's the peace I'm looking for.

641
00:23:36,440 --> 00:23:38,360
 And if you're new in these rooms,

642
00:23:38,360 --> 00:23:39,880
 I don't know if any of you are new here,

643
00:23:39,880 --> 00:23:41,400
 but damn, it's the best time.

644
00:23:41,400 --> 00:23:43,400
 People answer phones for this and get this guy,

645
00:23:43,400 --> 00:23:44,760
 you know, they'll come down.

646
00:23:44,760 --> 00:23:46,440
 I'm bringing donuts.

647
00:23:46,440 --> 00:23:48,000
 (laughs)

648
00:23:48,000 --> 00:23:49,080
 How'd you bring donuts?

649
00:23:49,080 --> 00:23:49,920
 (laughs)

650
00:23:49,920 --> 00:23:51,160
 You know, everybody likes donuts,

651
00:23:51,160 --> 00:23:52,400
 but doesn't like donuts.

652
00:23:52,400 --> 00:23:55,680
 But it's the men and women in these rooms,

653
00:23:55,680 --> 00:23:57,360
 you guys saved my life, you know,

654
00:23:57,360 --> 00:24:01,160
 and that's why I gladly agreed to come out here.

655
00:24:01,160 --> 00:24:02,480
 I've never been to your meeting before,

656
00:24:02,480 --> 00:24:05,080
 but I gladly agreed because I wanted to share

657
00:24:05,080 --> 00:24:06,600
 my experience with you guys

658
00:24:06,600 --> 00:24:08,520
 and hopefully you'll take something away from it.

659
00:24:08,520 --> 00:24:09,360
 Thank you.