1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,480 - Hi everyone, my name is Tom Lugo and I'm an alcoholic. 2 00:00:04,480 --> 00:00:06,960 And first of all, I would like to thank Ben 3 00:00:06,960 --> 00:00:09,160 for inviting me to come out from Las Vegas 4 00:00:09,160 --> 00:00:10,440 to come and share with you 5 00:00:10,440 --> 00:00:13,920 and for picking up my hotel expenses for the whole week. 6 00:00:13,920 --> 00:00:16,600 What, we need to pass the basket again? 7 00:00:16,600 --> 00:00:19,440 Actually I have one complaint about the damn hotel. 8 00:00:19,440 --> 00:00:23,960 I have to complain because their towels are so damn fluffy 9 00:00:23,960 --> 00:00:26,040 that I can't close my luggage. 10 00:00:26,040 --> 00:00:29,480 And so I'll make it up one way or another. 11 00:00:29,480 --> 00:00:31,620 And the truth of the matter is, 12 00:00:31,620 --> 00:00:35,480 is that I'm here this weekend to support my friend Sean. 13 00:00:35,480 --> 00:00:38,800 'Cause like Sean said, he got sober in this group. 14 00:00:38,800 --> 00:00:41,080 And in this group, we celebrate one year, 15 00:00:41,080 --> 00:00:43,100 five year, 10 year, 15, 20. 16 00:00:43,100 --> 00:00:43,940 - Seven. 17 00:00:43,940 --> 00:00:45,120 - Okay, I'm sorry. 18 00:00:45,120 --> 00:00:48,600 With a picnic and it's an honor and a privilege 19 00:00:48,600 --> 00:00:51,320 for me to be invited to participate 20 00:00:51,320 --> 00:00:53,060 in Sean's picnic tomorrow. 21 00:00:53,060 --> 00:00:56,960 And Ben took the opportunity to ask me to share. 22 00:00:56,960 --> 00:01:00,240 And if you're new here, I want to welcome you 23 00:01:00,240 --> 00:01:01,960 to Alcoholics Anonymous. 24 00:01:01,960 --> 00:01:03,480 And I also want to let you know 25 00:01:03,480 --> 00:01:05,840 that don't judge Alcoholics Anonymous 26 00:01:05,840 --> 00:01:07,440 by what you hear here tonight. 27 00:01:07,440 --> 00:01:11,720 Because I'm far from an expert in Alcoholics Anonymous. 28 00:01:11,720 --> 00:01:13,860 I'm just, it's just my turn in the barrel. 29 00:01:13,860 --> 00:01:16,880 And I do, as I'm asked in Alcoholics Anonymous, 30 00:01:16,880 --> 00:01:18,780 I want to welcome the new people 31 00:01:18,780 --> 00:01:23,080 and the friends near and far for being here tonight. 32 00:01:23,080 --> 00:01:24,760 And I just, if you're new, 33 00:01:24,760 --> 00:01:27,720 I know that I only have limited time to talk to you 34 00:01:27,720 --> 00:01:29,840 because when I was new, 35 00:01:29,840 --> 00:01:32,240 I couldn't pay attention for too long. 36 00:01:32,240 --> 00:01:35,300 And I was good for like five minute increments. 37 00:01:35,300 --> 00:01:37,560 And I could hear and then I would nod out 38 00:01:37,560 --> 00:01:40,760 and then I would wake up and say inappropriate stuff 39 00:01:40,760 --> 00:01:42,440 and then go back to sleep again. 40 00:01:42,440 --> 00:01:44,800 I would wake up when I should be sleeping 41 00:01:44,800 --> 00:01:47,840 and I would be sleeping when I'm supposed to be awake. 42 00:01:47,840 --> 00:01:49,840 And so if you're new here, 43 00:01:49,840 --> 00:01:51,640 I just want you to understand 44 00:01:51,640 --> 00:01:53,760 that Alcoholics Anonymous works. 45 00:01:53,760 --> 00:01:56,420 And if it could work for a knucklehead like me, 46 00:01:56,420 --> 00:01:58,440 it can work for anyone. 47 00:01:58,440 --> 00:02:00,600 I didn't walk into Alcoholics Anonymous 48 00:02:00,600 --> 00:02:02,040 just like I am today. 49 00:02:02,040 --> 00:02:05,420 In Las Vegas, they have a wonderful saying that I love. 50 00:02:05,420 --> 00:02:09,000 And it says, I didn't come in here on the winning streak. 51 00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:11,320 And we hear that all the time in Las Vegas. 52 00:02:11,320 --> 00:02:13,780 And that's where I live at now 53 00:02:13,780 --> 00:02:15,400 with these other two knuckleheads 54 00:02:15,400 --> 00:02:18,280 and a knucklehead over there in the back. 55 00:02:18,280 --> 00:02:22,080 And I didn't walk in here into Alcoholics Anonymous 56 00:02:22,080 --> 00:02:24,620 just ready to give my life to God 57 00:02:24,620 --> 00:02:26,960 and the principles and the steps of alcoholics. 58 00:02:26,960 --> 00:02:29,520 I wasn't even an alcoholic when I came here. 59 00:02:29,520 --> 00:02:31,840 Matter of fact, Bruce can attest to that 60 00:02:31,840 --> 00:02:34,680 because we were in treatment at the very same time. 61 00:02:34,680 --> 00:02:37,980 And I wasn't an alcoholic and news to you guys, 62 00:02:37,980 --> 00:02:40,520 Bruce wasn't an alcoholic either. 63 00:02:40,520 --> 00:02:43,120 Bruce used to talk about how he used to buy wine 64 00:02:43,120 --> 00:02:43,940 by the case. 65 00:02:43,940 --> 00:02:47,100 And my sponsor says, that's just a wino with a checkbook. 66 00:02:47,100 --> 00:02:50,560 And all we would do was we would sit there 67 00:02:50,560 --> 00:02:52,660 and complain about our wives. 68 00:02:52,660 --> 00:02:55,400 Well, if you had a wife like this, you'd be drinking too. 69 00:02:55,400 --> 00:02:56,240 Or if you had, 70 00:02:56,240 --> 00:02:58,560 and I didn't even think I had a drinking problem. 71 00:02:58,560 --> 00:03:01,180 I know I had problems galore, 72 00:03:01,180 --> 00:03:03,360 but I never thought that I had a problem 73 00:03:03,360 --> 00:03:04,780 that had to do with alcohol. 74 00:03:04,780 --> 00:03:07,620 And so I went into that stupid treatment program 75 00:03:07,620 --> 00:03:11,120 and they educated me to alcoholism as a disease. 76 00:03:11,120 --> 00:03:13,040 That's the only thing I got from them. 77 00:03:13,040 --> 00:03:18,040 They said alcoholism is a disease that has specific symptoms 78 00:03:18,040 --> 00:03:20,320 and it has a specific prognosis. 79 00:03:20,320 --> 00:03:24,100 And if you continue to drink like you're drinking, 80 00:03:24,100 --> 00:03:26,100 it's only gonna lead to three places, 81 00:03:26,100 --> 00:03:27,760 jail and sanity and death. 82 00:03:27,760 --> 00:03:29,240 And they also said, 83 00:03:29,240 --> 00:03:31,600 look to the people sitting side by side 84 00:03:31,600 --> 00:03:34,060 and the people that get involved with hospitals 85 00:03:34,060 --> 00:03:36,360 and institutions stand a better chance 86 00:03:36,360 --> 00:03:38,440 of making it an alcoholic synonymous. 87 00:03:38,440 --> 00:03:40,120 I wasn't even an alcoholic. 88 00:03:40,120 --> 00:03:42,600 They would force us to go to these thinking meetings. 89 00:03:42,600 --> 00:03:44,800 And I'm gonna tell you that 90 00:03:44,800 --> 00:03:46,860 I have to identify as an alcoholic. 91 00:03:46,860 --> 00:03:49,920 And so just for identification purposes, 92 00:03:50,560 --> 00:03:52,200 I grew up in New York City 93 00:03:52,200 --> 00:03:53,800 and not the part of New York City 94 00:03:53,800 --> 00:03:56,960 that you see with the beautiful buildings and the nice area. 95 00:03:56,960 --> 00:04:00,180 I grew up in Spanish Harlem, as they say, East Harlem. 96 00:04:00,180 --> 00:04:02,800 And I grew up in a single home. 97 00:04:02,800 --> 00:04:05,680 My mom raised me and my brother. 98 00:04:05,680 --> 00:04:06,800 And in that neighborhood, 99 00:04:06,800 --> 00:04:09,040 there was a lot of poverty, violence and crime. 100 00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:11,140 And that was just in our own house. 101 00:04:11,140 --> 00:04:16,140 And in my family, alcohol was accepted. 102 00:04:16,140 --> 00:04:18,280 There was always drinking going on. 103 00:04:18,280 --> 00:04:20,720 There was always some kind of a party or funeral 104 00:04:20,720 --> 00:04:23,880 or baptism or wedding or something going on. 105 00:04:23,880 --> 00:04:25,240 And drinking was allowed. 106 00:04:25,240 --> 00:04:26,660 Drugs was never allowed. 107 00:04:26,660 --> 00:04:29,200 And in my family, there's always secrets. 108 00:04:29,200 --> 00:04:31,200 And we didn't talk about a lot of things. 109 00:04:31,200 --> 00:04:33,760 And so that didn't make me an alcoholic. 110 00:04:33,760 --> 00:04:36,440 And I don't actually remember my first drink, 111 00:04:36,440 --> 00:04:38,080 but I remember my first drunk. 112 00:04:38,080 --> 00:04:40,840 And I would remember it was a family situation. 113 00:04:40,840 --> 00:04:43,760 We were at somebody's house celebrating something 114 00:04:43,760 --> 00:04:45,760 and they would make this punch 115 00:04:45,760 --> 00:04:48,820 with Manischeritz wine and fruit cocktail. 116 00:04:48,820 --> 00:04:50,160 And they called it something. 117 00:04:50,160 --> 00:04:52,240 I forget what they call it, Española or something. 118 00:04:52,240 --> 00:04:53,700 I don't know what the hell they called it. 119 00:04:53,700 --> 00:04:56,000 But all I remember was we snagged a bottle 120 00:04:56,000 --> 00:04:58,500 of that Manischeritz and went up to my cousin's room 121 00:04:58,500 --> 00:05:00,320 and we started to pass it around. 122 00:05:00,320 --> 00:05:03,600 And all I remember was they took a few sips 123 00:05:03,600 --> 00:05:05,780 and they all fell asleep and I kept drinking. 124 00:05:05,780 --> 00:05:08,220 And I woke up and the lights came on 125 00:05:08,220 --> 00:05:09,380 and I was in the kitchen 126 00:05:09,380 --> 00:05:11,760 and there was puke flying all over the place. 127 00:05:11,760 --> 00:05:14,920 And all I remember was these big faces coming in and out. 128 00:05:14,920 --> 00:05:18,000 And I didn't become an alcoholic that night, 129 00:05:18,000 --> 00:05:22,640 but it sure set the tempo for how I would drink when I drank. 130 00:05:22,640 --> 00:05:25,480 When I drank, I couldn't predict what would happen. 131 00:05:25,480 --> 00:05:26,900 If I was gonna take a few 132 00:05:26,900 --> 00:05:30,400 or if I was gonna shut the lights off and be gone. 133 00:05:30,400 --> 00:05:33,600 And the problem with alcohol was that it worked. 134 00:05:33,600 --> 00:05:36,020 And so alcohol led to a few other things. 135 00:05:36,020 --> 00:05:37,960 I was going to a real nice high school. 136 00:05:37,960 --> 00:05:39,360 I was doing very well. 137 00:05:39,360 --> 00:05:41,860 But the minute I started drinking and using, 138 00:05:41,860 --> 00:05:44,800 my grades started to falter 139 00:05:44,800 --> 00:05:47,320 and I started to really mess up in school. 140 00:05:47,320 --> 00:05:49,420 I was a bad student. 141 00:05:49,420 --> 00:05:50,840 I went to a really good school 142 00:05:50,840 --> 00:05:52,520 and graduated six months later 143 00:05:52,520 --> 00:05:55,920 because I failed gym in my last semester. 144 00:05:55,920 --> 00:05:58,640 And I was not trustworthy. 145 00:05:58,640 --> 00:06:00,900 And so my family, they tried everything. 146 00:06:00,900 --> 00:06:02,660 They gave me good values. 147 00:06:02,660 --> 00:06:04,500 I went to Catholic school. 148 00:06:04,500 --> 00:06:06,140 I was a good kid. 149 00:06:06,140 --> 00:06:07,920 But when I started drinking and using, 150 00:06:07,920 --> 00:06:10,280 all of that went sideways. 151 00:06:10,280 --> 00:06:11,960 And so I couldn't be trusted. 152 00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:14,180 I couldn't be counted on for a damn thing. 153 00:06:14,180 --> 00:06:18,420 And in 1980, my mom had just about as much as she could stand 154 00:06:18,420 --> 00:06:21,160 and I had interviewed for this job in California. 155 00:06:21,160 --> 00:06:22,400 She put me on a plane 156 00:06:22,400 --> 00:06:24,940 and gave me a one way ticket to California 157 00:06:24,940 --> 00:06:26,600 and took the house keys. 158 00:06:26,600 --> 00:06:28,260 And I started on my merry way. 159 00:06:28,260 --> 00:06:30,760 And like Sean, it didn't take long for me 160 00:06:30,760 --> 00:06:32,660 to figure out who was holding. 161 00:06:32,660 --> 00:06:35,520 And I found this group that I associated with. 162 00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:37,800 And long story short, I had a great job 163 00:06:37,800 --> 00:06:40,640 at this aircraft company in Burbank. 164 00:06:40,640 --> 00:06:42,720 And I was working on a top secret program 165 00:06:42,720 --> 00:06:44,180 that nobody in the world knew about. 166 00:06:44,180 --> 00:06:45,680 I was working on airplanes. 167 00:06:45,680 --> 00:06:49,820 And I tried my best to lose that job. 168 00:06:49,820 --> 00:06:51,840 I tried everything I could to lose that. 169 00:06:51,840 --> 00:06:52,720 It was a union job. 170 00:06:52,720 --> 00:06:55,280 So you can't really get fired, you know what I mean? 171 00:06:55,280 --> 00:06:59,840 And so fast forward, in 1988 was when I went into rehab. 172 00:06:59,840 --> 00:07:04,840 And my whole last year of using was trying to quit every day. 173 00:07:04,840 --> 00:07:07,080 Every day, every day, every day, every day. 174 00:07:07,080 --> 00:07:09,400 And I would get up in the morning 175 00:07:09,400 --> 00:07:11,760 and I would come to in the morning 176 00:07:11,760 --> 00:07:13,280 and I would get in the shower 177 00:07:13,280 --> 00:07:15,200 and I would sneeze and chunks of blood 178 00:07:15,200 --> 00:07:16,660 would come out of my nose. 179 00:07:16,660 --> 00:07:18,520 And I would follow it up 180 00:07:18,520 --> 00:07:21,560 with one of those little squiggly cigarettes 181 00:07:21,560 --> 00:07:23,420 and smoke that up and feel better. 182 00:07:23,420 --> 00:07:25,000 And then I would say, 183 00:07:25,000 --> 00:07:26,640 "Okay, now it's ready to go to work." 184 00:07:26,640 --> 00:07:27,560 And I'd be at work. 185 00:07:27,560 --> 00:07:30,240 And at lunchtime, it would be a race 186 00:07:30,240 --> 00:07:32,560 to this Mexican restaurant down the block. 187 00:07:32,560 --> 00:07:34,620 And the race was to see how much beer 188 00:07:34,620 --> 00:07:36,760 we could put down in a half an hour. 189 00:07:36,760 --> 00:07:39,280 And we would smoke half of one of those funny cigarettes 190 00:07:39,280 --> 00:07:41,560 on the way there and half on the way back. 191 00:07:41,560 --> 00:07:43,520 And we would have these ice cold pictures 192 00:07:43,520 --> 00:07:45,940 of beer waiting for us and burritos. 193 00:07:45,940 --> 00:07:50,520 And I never, ever, ever left any beer in that picture. 194 00:07:50,520 --> 00:07:53,420 But there was many times that I got maybe a half a bite 195 00:07:53,420 --> 00:07:54,900 or a bite out of that burrito. 196 00:07:54,900 --> 00:07:58,000 And today the burrito doesn't stand a chance in my life. 197 00:07:58,000 --> 00:07:59,640 As you can tell. 198 00:07:59,640 --> 00:08:03,560 My sobriety date is February 22nd of 1988. 199 00:08:03,560 --> 00:08:06,760 And I've been sober what some people say is a long time. 200 00:08:06,760 --> 00:08:08,600 But my sobriety is based on 201 00:08:08,600 --> 00:08:10,740 the people in Alcoholics Anonymous. 202 00:08:10,740 --> 00:08:13,000 I have a lot of history in this group. 203 00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:14,920 And walking in here. 204 00:08:14,920 --> 00:08:17,240 (laughing) 205 00:08:17,240 --> 00:08:18,080 - Went into it right there. 206 00:08:18,080 --> 00:08:21,440 - Walking in here, I had a lot of feelings walking in there. 207 00:08:21,440 --> 00:08:24,320 I remember at the other meeting, I sat behind Greg 208 00:08:24,320 --> 00:08:28,240 and we shared some intimate moments together. 209 00:08:28,240 --> 00:08:31,480 As me and Bruce have shared some intimate moments together. 210 00:08:31,480 --> 00:08:33,480 We used to go out for each other's dinner 211 00:08:33,480 --> 00:08:35,640 every year, every year, every year. 212 00:08:35,640 --> 00:08:38,840 And sometimes almost to the brink of disaster, right? 213 00:08:38,840 --> 00:08:39,800 (laughing) 214 00:08:39,800 --> 00:08:43,440 And Tammy's been in my life ever since her sobriety. 215 00:08:43,440 --> 00:08:46,520 And I love to see people that I saw come in 216 00:08:46,520 --> 00:08:48,800 because that's what helps me stay sober. 217 00:08:48,800 --> 00:08:53,000 Just like Sean, just like Ben and so many other you guys 218 00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:54,440 that I can't thank you enough. 219 00:08:54,440 --> 00:08:58,400 My whole sobriety, I have had angels in my sobriety 220 00:08:58,400 --> 00:09:00,240 guiding me every step of the way. 221 00:09:00,240 --> 00:09:02,240 Because I'm no rocket to stardom. 222 00:09:02,240 --> 00:09:04,040 I'm no rocket to stardom, my best friend 223 00:09:04,040 --> 00:09:07,480 who's not here tonight, David F, he's at a concert. 224 00:09:07,480 --> 00:09:08,560 He's at a Chris Rock. 225 00:09:08,560 --> 00:09:11,280 I hope he gets the crap slapped out of him by Chris Rock. 226 00:09:11,280 --> 00:09:14,800 But his birthday, his belly button birthday is tomorrow. 227 00:09:14,800 --> 00:09:17,280 So his family took him out to this concert. 228 00:09:17,280 --> 00:09:19,200 And that guy saved my life. 229 00:09:19,200 --> 00:09:20,360 And there's been other people. 230 00:09:20,360 --> 00:09:21,720 There's people on that screen. 231 00:09:21,720 --> 00:09:24,520 Glenn, my friend Glenn from Arizona is there. 232 00:09:24,520 --> 00:09:27,080 My friend Ken from Georgia is on there. 233 00:09:27,080 --> 00:09:30,800 And those guys have played a part in my sobriety. 234 00:09:30,800 --> 00:09:34,440 So my sobriety has very little to do with what I've done, 235 00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:37,440 but what Alcoholics Anonymous has done for me. 236 00:09:37,440 --> 00:09:39,400 And all I've managed to do 237 00:09:39,400 --> 00:09:41,600 was surround myself with winners. 238 00:09:41,600 --> 00:09:43,320 And if you're new here, 239 00:09:43,320 --> 00:09:46,280 the other thing that I can tell you is to get a friend. 240 00:09:46,280 --> 00:09:48,920 And get a friend and make that friend your best friend. 241 00:09:48,920 --> 00:09:51,520 Because your best friend, I got people in this group, 242 00:09:51,520 --> 00:09:54,440 I got people in my life that care about me 243 00:09:54,440 --> 00:09:57,080 enough to tell me the stuff I don't wanna hear. 244 00:09:57,080 --> 00:10:00,440 And I got people in my life that know all my secrets 245 00:10:00,440 --> 00:10:01,560 and still love me. 246 00:10:01,560 --> 00:10:02,400 Shut up Adam. 247 00:10:02,400 --> 00:10:06,880 My wife, she's at the hotel. 248 00:10:06,880 --> 00:10:10,400 And recently my wife is disabled. 249 00:10:10,400 --> 00:10:14,280 And so it's hard for her to sit through periods 250 00:10:14,280 --> 00:10:15,120 for a long time. 251 00:10:15,120 --> 00:10:17,040 And so she couldn't come to dinner 252 00:10:17,040 --> 00:10:18,880 and then sit through the meeting for an hour. 253 00:10:18,880 --> 00:10:20,520 It was gonna be too uncomfortable for her. 254 00:10:20,520 --> 00:10:22,240 So she said, honey, you go. 255 00:10:22,240 --> 00:10:23,680 I don't need to hear your story. 256 00:10:23,680 --> 00:10:25,040 I lived your story. 257 00:10:25,040 --> 00:10:26,280 The truth of the matter is, 258 00:10:26,280 --> 00:10:28,680 I don't need her in the back of the room saying, 259 00:10:28,680 --> 00:10:31,000 tell the truth, tell the truth. 260 00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:32,960 I don't need her, but I love her. 261 00:10:32,960 --> 00:10:35,520 And we've been together a long time 262 00:10:35,520 --> 00:10:37,840 and she knows all the secrets too. 263 00:10:37,840 --> 00:10:39,800 And I don't know. 264 00:10:39,800 --> 00:10:41,520 I'm gonna tell you a little bit about Sean. 265 00:10:41,520 --> 00:10:42,520 How much time do I got? 266 00:10:42,520 --> 00:10:44,280 I just started, right? 267 00:10:44,280 --> 00:10:46,920 This guy Sean, when we were at the other meeting 268 00:10:46,920 --> 00:10:50,360 and I heard him share, he was like a babbling fool. 269 00:10:50,360 --> 00:10:53,000 He was standing up here shaking like a leaf, 270 00:10:53,000 --> 00:10:54,360 sweating bullets. 271 00:10:54,360 --> 00:10:56,720 And I don't even remember what he said. 272 00:10:56,720 --> 00:10:58,960 But I was trained that we always thank 273 00:10:58,960 --> 00:11:00,360 the 10 minute speaker. 274 00:11:00,360 --> 00:11:01,520 (laughing) 275 00:11:01,520 --> 00:11:04,760 And I knew that this guy was uncomfortable. 276 00:11:04,760 --> 00:11:06,880 And I went and I thanked him for sharing. 277 00:11:06,880 --> 00:11:08,800 And I don't even remember him, right? 278 00:11:08,800 --> 00:11:11,240 Fast forward, couple of years ago, 279 00:11:11,240 --> 00:11:12,920 I moved to Vegas, 280 00:11:12,920 --> 00:11:15,600 transferred with my company from California. 281 00:11:15,600 --> 00:11:19,480 And I had a job where I would be gone during the week. 282 00:11:19,480 --> 00:11:21,360 I would disappear off the planet earth 283 00:11:21,360 --> 00:11:24,160 and I would come in on an airplane on Friday 284 00:11:24,160 --> 00:11:26,080 and then Monday I would disappear again. 285 00:11:26,080 --> 00:11:29,000 So I only had time to do chores and pay bills. 286 00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:31,200 And this knucklehead started calling me. 287 00:11:31,200 --> 00:11:33,640 And he goes, "Hey Tom, I don't know if you remember me, 288 00:11:33,640 --> 00:11:36,520 "but I moved to Vegas and David F told me to call you 289 00:11:36,520 --> 00:11:39,000 "and maybe you could take me to a few meetings." 290 00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:42,160 And I just wasn't paying no attention to this guy. 291 00:11:42,160 --> 00:11:44,800 And so I was getting close to retirement. 292 00:11:44,800 --> 00:11:47,320 And I read this story in the big book about a guy 293 00:11:47,320 --> 00:11:51,200 that had long-term sobriety and retired and drank 294 00:11:51,200 --> 00:11:53,800 and died maybe less than three years later. 295 00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:55,320 And I got scared. 296 00:11:55,320 --> 00:11:58,320 And I says, "Time for me to get my butt to a meeting." 297 00:11:58,320 --> 00:12:00,560 And so I returned this guy's phone call. 298 00:12:00,560 --> 00:12:01,800 And I said, "Hey Sean, yeah, 299 00:12:01,800 --> 00:12:04,640 "I'll be glad to take you to a few meetings." 300 00:12:04,640 --> 00:12:08,520 And we met at this meeting on a Saturday morning, 301 00:12:08,520 --> 00:12:12,400 the GVG Green Valley Group, Illustrious Men's Stag. 302 00:12:12,400 --> 00:12:14,760 And we've been going to that meeting ever since. 303 00:12:14,760 --> 00:12:19,080 And that meeting has loved us and welcomed us. 304 00:12:19,080 --> 00:12:21,400 And it's my home group now. 305 00:12:21,400 --> 00:12:22,920 We're of service to that group. 306 00:12:22,920 --> 00:12:27,320 And I cannot believe the love and the sobriety 307 00:12:27,320 --> 00:12:30,160 that I've discovered in Las Vegas. 308 00:12:30,160 --> 00:12:32,360 I never thought of Las Vegas as a place 309 00:12:32,360 --> 00:12:34,040 to have good sobriety. 310 00:12:34,040 --> 00:12:36,720 But every meeting that I go to is a great meeting. 311 00:12:36,720 --> 00:12:38,600 There's another meeting that I go to. 312 00:12:38,600 --> 00:12:40,160 It's called the Cartel Group. 313 00:12:40,160 --> 00:12:41,800 And it's another men's meeting. 314 00:12:41,800 --> 00:12:43,600 And it's a no BS meeting. 315 00:12:43,600 --> 00:12:46,120 It's 45 minutes and men share. 316 00:12:46,120 --> 00:12:50,240 And there's guys from all different walks of life, 317 00:12:50,240 --> 00:12:53,440 all different colors, all different everything. 318 00:12:53,440 --> 00:12:54,520 And we go to that meeting. 319 00:12:54,520 --> 00:12:57,560 And what I hear at that meeting is what I heard here. 320 00:12:57,560 --> 00:12:59,960 It's the chitter chatter before the meeting. 321 00:12:59,960 --> 00:13:02,280 It's what we call the language of the heart. 322 00:13:02,280 --> 00:13:05,640 And I hear that the recovery in that meeting. 323 00:13:05,640 --> 00:13:07,960 And sometimes there's new guys at that meeting. 324 00:13:07,960 --> 00:13:11,320 Sometimes there's guys with 40 plus years of that meeting. 325 00:13:11,320 --> 00:13:14,160 And all I know is that what brings us here 326 00:13:14,160 --> 00:13:16,720 is our common suffering and pain. 327 00:13:16,720 --> 00:13:20,000 Like I said, nobody comes in here on a winning streak. 328 00:13:20,000 --> 00:13:23,520 And we could all identify with having one day of sobriety. 329 00:13:23,520 --> 00:13:27,160 But what keeps us here is our commitment to sobriety. 330 00:13:27,160 --> 00:13:30,880 And all I know is that I have to surround myself. 331 00:13:30,880 --> 00:13:33,360 I have to surround myself with people 332 00:13:33,360 --> 00:13:35,720 that are actively engaged in the program. 333 00:13:35,720 --> 00:13:38,080 Because if I forget, 334 00:13:38,080 --> 00:13:41,360 I heard a guy share at the Men's Stag months ago. 335 00:13:41,360 --> 00:13:43,880 And this guy went out after several years. 336 00:13:43,880 --> 00:13:47,960 And he said, "I had too many years and not enough days." 337 00:13:47,960 --> 00:13:51,280 And so I have to remember that all I have 338 00:13:51,280 --> 00:13:52,600 is a day at a time. 339 00:13:52,600 --> 00:13:56,640 And all I have is a sobriety 340 00:13:56,640 --> 00:13:59,560 based on the maintenance of my spiritual condition. 341 00:13:59,560 --> 00:14:01,640 I've had friends throughout my life. 342 00:14:01,640 --> 00:14:04,040 I'll tell you about my best friend, Ron Coleman. 343 00:14:04,040 --> 00:14:06,680 I had this guy who I hated at a meeting. 344 00:14:06,680 --> 00:14:09,160 And my sponsor, Whitey, says, "You see that guy? 345 00:14:09,160 --> 00:14:11,240 "Whatever he's doing, you better be doing." 346 00:14:11,240 --> 00:14:14,640 And so I developed a relationship with this man. 347 00:14:14,640 --> 00:14:17,720 And this man taught me how to live sober 348 00:14:17,720 --> 00:14:19,160 and how to die sober. 349 00:14:19,160 --> 00:14:21,160 And every time I watched that guy, 350 00:14:21,160 --> 00:14:23,440 he was always doing the right thing. 351 00:14:23,440 --> 00:14:25,440 And he taught me and he guided me. 352 00:14:25,440 --> 00:14:27,000 And he took me places. 353 00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:28,640 We went all over the place. 354 00:14:28,640 --> 00:14:33,040 And Ron was welcome in my house like a family member. 355 00:14:33,040 --> 00:14:34,200 He didn't have to call. 356 00:14:34,200 --> 00:14:35,600 He didn't have to knock on the door. 357 00:14:35,600 --> 00:14:36,680 He would just come in. 358 00:14:36,680 --> 00:14:39,520 And Ron got sick and he developed cancer. 359 00:14:39,520 --> 00:14:41,560 And he was suffering in the hospital. 360 00:14:41,560 --> 00:14:45,120 And I didn't know when I visited Ron for the last time 361 00:14:45,120 --> 00:14:47,640 that it was gonna be the last time I would see my friend. 362 00:14:47,640 --> 00:14:51,560 And I was going to a tournament with my daughter 363 00:14:51,560 --> 00:14:52,720 to play soccer. 364 00:14:52,720 --> 00:14:55,080 And I wanted to see Ron before we left. 365 00:14:55,080 --> 00:14:56,960 And we were sitting in his hospital room. 366 00:14:56,960 --> 00:14:58,680 He was nodded out. 367 00:14:58,680 --> 00:15:00,320 And I'm just sitting there. 368 00:15:00,320 --> 00:15:03,000 And he woke up and he goes, "Hey, Tom." 369 00:15:03,000 --> 00:15:04,280 And I go, "How you doing, Ron?" 370 00:15:04,280 --> 00:15:05,280 He goes, "I'm doing good. 371 00:15:05,280 --> 00:15:06,440 "How are you doing?" 372 00:15:06,440 --> 00:15:08,440 And I go, "What do you mean how am I doing?" 373 00:15:08,440 --> 00:15:10,120 He goes, "How are you doing, Tom?" 374 00:15:10,120 --> 00:15:11,560 I go, "What do you mean how am I doing? 375 00:15:11,560 --> 00:15:13,520 "Dude, you're the one that's fucking dying?" 376 00:15:13,520 --> 00:15:15,160 Oops, I'm sorry, I apologize. 377 00:15:15,160 --> 00:15:17,120 You're the one that's dying here, dude. 378 00:15:17,120 --> 00:15:18,920 What do you mean how am I doing? 379 00:15:18,920 --> 00:15:20,800 And he goes, "Tom, I'm okay. 380 00:15:20,800 --> 00:15:21,800 "I'm gonna be okay. 381 00:15:21,800 --> 00:15:24,280 "You're the one that gotta get right with God." 382 00:15:24,280 --> 00:15:26,880 And I didn't know that was gonna be the last words 383 00:15:26,880 --> 00:15:27,920 that he ever told me. 384 00:15:27,920 --> 00:15:31,000 But all I know was that I heard what I needed to hear. 385 00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:33,120 And I've been working on that relationship 386 00:15:33,120 --> 00:15:35,720 with a higher power because like Ron used to say, 387 00:15:35,720 --> 00:15:38,080 there will come a time where the only defense 388 00:15:38,080 --> 00:15:41,760 against a drink must come from a power greater than yourself. 389 00:15:41,760 --> 00:15:44,520 And he says great events will come to pass. 390 00:15:44,520 --> 00:15:46,200 Not great good events. 391 00:15:46,200 --> 00:15:48,400 Sometimes great bad events. 392 00:15:48,400 --> 00:15:51,800 And in my sobriety, I have had tests along the way 393 00:15:51,800 --> 00:15:53,880 where I have had to make the choice 394 00:15:53,880 --> 00:15:56,080 to drink or to stay sober. 395 00:15:56,080 --> 00:15:59,440 And I found myself, let's say 2014, 396 00:15:59,440 --> 00:16:01,560 great, comfortable in my sobriety. 397 00:16:01,560 --> 00:16:05,600 I was on Las Vegas Boulevard on New Year's Eve, 398 00:16:05,600 --> 00:16:07,960 surrounded by thousands of people, 399 00:16:07,960 --> 00:16:09,680 comfortable in my sobriety. 400 00:16:09,680 --> 00:16:13,280 And I turned around and my daughter was lip-locked 401 00:16:13,280 --> 00:16:16,480 with this other girl and I wanted to drink that night. 402 00:16:16,480 --> 00:16:17,360 I wanted to drink. 403 00:16:17,360 --> 00:16:20,600 Now I got plenty of friends that are gay in this program, 404 00:16:20,600 --> 00:16:23,720 guys and girls, and I love them like brothers and sisters. 405 00:16:23,720 --> 00:16:26,760 But when I saw that, I wanted to drink. 406 00:16:26,760 --> 00:16:28,240 I didn't wanna call David. 407 00:16:28,240 --> 00:16:30,160 I didn't wanna call my sponsor, John. 408 00:16:30,160 --> 00:16:32,120 I didn't wanna call Glenn or Ken. 409 00:16:32,120 --> 00:16:33,400 I wanted to drink. 410 00:16:33,400 --> 00:16:36,320 And I immediately went upstairs. 411 00:16:36,320 --> 00:16:37,600 We were supposed to go to dinner. 412 00:16:37,600 --> 00:16:38,640 I said, "I don't feel good." 413 00:16:38,640 --> 00:16:41,480 I went upstairs and I cried and I wanted to drink. 414 00:16:41,480 --> 00:16:43,600 And all of a sudden, out of nowhere, 415 00:16:43,600 --> 00:16:46,040 I heard this voice that came into my head and said, 416 00:16:46,040 --> 00:16:49,640 "Tom, don't ever let someone else be responsible 417 00:16:49,640 --> 00:16:51,680 "for you taking that first drink." 418 00:16:51,680 --> 00:16:53,160 And I didn't drink that night. 419 00:16:53,160 --> 00:16:57,680 And the next day we checked out and I cried and I yelled 420 00:16:57,680 --> 00:17:00,520 and I screamed at my wife for three and a half hours 421 00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:02,680 till we drove back to California. 422 00:17:02,680 --> 00:17:04,080 But I didn't have to drink. 423 00:17:04,080 --> 00:17:06,520 And I was working through that issue for months, 424 00:17:06,520 --> 00:17:08,000 didn't talk to my daughter. 425 00:17:08,000 --> 00:17:10,880 And this other knucklehead, my Uber driver, Pete, 426 00:17:10,880 --> 00:17:14,120 who I met, I met Pete at the other meeting 427 00:17:14,120 --> 00:17:16,160 when he had four days of sobriety. 428 00:17:16,160 --> 00:17:19,560 And I was sitting there, Pete knows everything about me. 429 00:17:19,560 --> 00:17:21,280 Pete, don't say nothing to nobody. 430 00:17:21,280 --> 00:17:27,160 And Pete said to me, "Tom, is your daughter happy today?" 431 00:17:27,160 --> 00:17:29,520 And I go, "Pete, she's as happy as she's ever been." 432 00:17:29,520 --> 00:17:31,440 And he goes, "They mind your business. 433 00:17:31,440 --> 00:17:33,240 "Your job is to love your daughter." 434 00:17:33,240 --> 00:17:37,120 And that opened the door to me forgiving myself and her. 435 00:17:37,120 --> 00:17:38,360 And I got together with her. 436 00:17:38,360 --> 00:17:39,200 We talked about it. 437 00:17:39,200 --> 00:17:40,640 I love my daughter more than anything. 438 00:17:40,640 --> 00:17:42,440 My son is another story. 439 00:17:42,440 --> 00:17:45,640 My son, people know that me and my son have struggled 440 00:17:45,640 --> 00:17:47,200 for years and years and years. 441 00:17:47,200 --> 00:17:49,960 My son grew up going to Life's In Session meeting. 442 00:17:49,960 --> 00:17:52,680 My son busted the window at Life's In Session, 443 00:17:52,680 --> 00:17:54,720 playing around, throwing oranges at cars. 444 00:17:54,720 --> 00:17:59,720 He grew up in AA, but he resists this program. 445 00:17:59,720 --> 00:18:01,240 And I understand that. 446 00:18:01,240 --> 00:18:03,240 And I have to love him no matter what. 447 00:18:03,240 --> 00:18:06,040 And we went through some real tough times. 448 00:18:06,040 --> 00:18:09,000 And I had to pray for him every day and every night, 449 00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:11,560 just like I had to do with my daughter and my wife 450 00:18:11,560 --> 00:18:12,960 and all my friends. 451 00:18:12,960 --> 00:18:15,240 And one day, out of the blue, 452 00:18:15,240 --> 00:18:17,200 Pete starts talking to my son. 453 00:18:17,200 --> 00:18:19,080 I had to have him evicted from my house 454 00:18:19,080 --> 00:18:20,600 to sell the house in Lancaster. 455 00:18:20,600 --> 00:18:22,200 I lost a lot of money over that. 456 00:18:22,200 --> 00:18:23,680 And I was losing so much money. 457 00:18:23,680 --> 00:18:25,280 And Pete says, "Hey, Tom, don't worry 458 00:18:25,280 --> 00:18:26,520 "about how much money you lost. 459 00:18:26,520 --> 00:18:28,920 "You don't have to make that mortgage payment anymore." 460 00:18:28,920 --> 00:18:30,640 And I had to be grateful for that. 461 00:18:30,640 --> 00:18:33,080 And it was really tough for many years. 462 00:18:33,080 --> 00:18:37,000 All of a sudden, my son, he found his own way. 463 00:18:37,000 --> 00:18:38,840 And he found Jesus Christ. 464 00:18:38,840 --> 00:18:41,400 And so now we're talking, we're visiting. 465 00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:45,680 And it's not for me to judge what program he works. 466 00:18:45,680 --> 00:18:48,240 It's for me to love him no matter what. 467 00:18:48,240 --> 00:18:50,920 And we have about the best relationship. 468 00:18:50,920 --> 00:18:52,200 We took a picture together. 469 00:18:52,200 --> 00:18:55,360 I can't tell you the last time me and my son took a picture. 470 00:18:55,360 --> 00:18:58,880 And I owe my friend Pete forever for helping me with that. 471 00:18:58,880 --> 00:19:01,480 Pete, he's the kind of guy that calls me up 472 00:19:01,480 --> 00:19:04,320 when he's feeling down just so I could tell him 473 00:19:04,320 --> 00:19:06,080 what kind of a day I'm having 474 00:19:06,080 --> 00:19:09,520 so that he could feel better about himself. (laughs) 475 00:19:09,520 --> 00:19:13,000 And sometimes I had to call Pete and say, "Pete!" 476 00:19:13,000 --> 00:19:14,680 And he goes, "Man, you ain't gonna believe 477 00:19:14,680 --> 00:19:16,040 "what happened to me, man." 478 00:19:16,040 --> 00:19:18,000 And then I start feeling better. 479 00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:21,720 And the thing about Pete is that he came 480 00:19:21,720 --> 00:19:24,480 from the same family that I came from, 481 00:19:24,480 --> 00:19:27,880 a family of secrets, a family of long history. 482 00:19:27,880 --> 00:19:31,720 And my mother, she had an uncle, Tio Jarabielle, 483 00:19:31,720 --> 00:19:34,960 that died in the hospital of alcoholism when I was a child. 484 00:19:34,960 --> 00:19:36,320 And I never knew this guy. 485 00:19:36,320 --> 00:19:38,480 All I knew was that his stomach was hanging out, 486 00:19:38,480 --> 00:19:40,320 and he died, and that was alcoholism. 487 00:19:40,320 --> 00:19:41,560 They never spoke about that. 488 00:19:41,560 --> 00:19:44,640 My brother, a few years back, passed away. 489 00:19:44,640 --> 00:19:46,720 And on his death certificate, 490 00:19:46,720 --> 00:19:51,720 it says that his bowels perforated and exploded, 491 00:19:51,720 --> 00:19:53,000 and he died of poisoning. 492 00:19:53,000 --> 00:19:55,520 It doesn't say that he was so high on heroin 493 00:19:55,520 --> 00:19:57,000 that he couldn't feel the pain. 494 00:19:57,000 --> 00:19:59,320 And when they got to him, it was too late, and he died. 495 00:19:59,320 --> 00:20:02,240 Last year, my uncle, who came from Vietnam 496 00:20:02,240 --> 00:20:05,520 with a little heroin problem, he passed away 497 00:20:05,520 --> 00:20:07,920 of stage four liver disease, 498 00:20:07,920 --> 00:20:10,760 and it doesn't say alcoholism in his state. 499 00:20:10,760 --> 00:20:13,840 My aunt, she walks around with a short dog 500 00:20:13,840 --> 00:20:16,400 in her back pocket, and every time she gets short 501 00:20:16,400 --> 00:20:19,120 on the rent, she goes into rehab, and they pay the rent. 502 00:20:19,120 --> 00:20:21,280 They catch it up, she gets clean, and then she goes back 503 00:20:21,280 --> 00:20:22,720 and does the same thing all over again. 504 00:20:22,720 --> 00:20:24,920 And they don't understand sobriety, 505 00:20:24,920 --> 00:20:27,520 and they don't have to understand sobriety. 506 00:20:27,520 --> 00:20:29,560 I have to understand sobriety. 507 00:20:29,560 --> 00:20:32,200 For me, sobriety is life or death. 508 00:20:32,200 --> 00:20:33,880 There's no gray area for me. 509 00:20:33,880 --> 00:20:36,720 There was a guy in our men's stag a few weeks ago. 510 00:20:36,720 --> 00:20:39,440 This guy's a celebrity, everybody loved him to death, 511 00:20:39,440 --> 00:20:41,120 big shot, and he came back. 512 00:20:41,120 --> 00:20:43,520 I hadn't seen him in a while, and he came back, 513 00:20:43,520 --> 00:20:47,040 and he says, "I just got out of detox last night." 514 00:20:47,040 --> 00:20:49,400 And he goes, "I went to Switzerland, 515 00:20:49,400 --> 00:20:52,440 "and I drank all this booze and snorted all this coke, 516 00:20:52,440 --> 00:20:54,800 "and I overdosed two times, but I made it back, 517 00:20:54,800 --> 00:20:56,600 "and I'm glad to be with my friends." 518 00:20:56,600 --> 00:20:59,440 And I said, "You son of a, I'm glad you're back, 519 00:20:59,440 --> 00:21:02,600 "but man, I wish I could go out and snort all that, 520 00:21:02,600 --> 00:21:04,520 "and drink all that, and come back and say, 521 00:21:04,520 --> 00:21:05,960 "Hey guys, welcome back." 522 00:21:05,960 --> 00:21:08,680 I don't have another chance at sobriety. 523 00:21:08,680 --> 00:21:12,480 I cherish my sobriety like I do life or death. 524 00:21:12,480 --> 00:21:14,920 And so to me, I don't have a chance. 525 00:21:14,920 --> 00:21:17,600 And so no matter what's going on in my life, 526 00:21:17,600 --> 00:21:19,680 I have to put sobriety first, 527 00:21:19,680 --> 00:21:22,600 because a couple of years ago, 528 00:21:22,600 --> 00:21:27,120 I retired March 31st of this year, 529 00:21:27,120 --> 00:21:28,920 it was two years that I retired. 530 00:21:28,920 --> 00:21:32,600 And I retired March 31st, 2020, 531 00:21:32,600 --> 00:21:35,880 because Pete said, "My birthday is April 1st." 532 00:21:35,880 --> 00:21:36,840 And Pete said to me, 533 00:21:36,840 --> 00:21:40,240 "Tom, if you're still working at 60 years old, 534 00:21:40,240 --> 00:21:42,560 "I'm gonna put a bullet in your head." 535 00:21:42,560 --> 00:21:45,220 He goes, "You've been working hard enough, long enough, 536 00:21:45,220 --> 00:21:46,840 "it's time for you to retire." 537 00:21:46,840 --> 00:21:50,400 So I retired one day before I turned 60 years old. 538 00:21:50,400 --> 00:21:53,400 And as I was driving off that gate for the last time, 539 00:21:53,400 --> 00:21:56,320 and feeling sad, and feeling really all that, 540 00:21:56,320 --> 00:21:57,920 I called Pete, and I go, 541 00:21:57,920 --> 00:21:59,280 "Hey, Pete, how's it going?" 542 00:21:59,280 --> 00:22:01,680 He goes, "I'm in New York trying to get that contract." 543 00:22:01,680 --> 00:22:03,720 So I go, "Pete, cancel the contract, man. 544 00:22:03,720 --> 00:22:05,440 "I just retired, man." 545 00:22:05,440 --> 00:22:07,340 And I go, "I'm gonna travel and live a life. 546 00:22:07,340 --> 00:22:10,100 "I'm retired now, I got a good pension and all that." 547 00:22:10,100 --> 00:22:11,920 And all of a sudden, soon after that, 548 00:22:11,920 --> 00:22:15,040 my wife was diagnosed with a neurological condition, 549 00:22:15,040 --> 00:22:17,620 and now she's fully disabled. 550 00:22:17,620 --> 00:22:21,160 And so my life is not what I had designed. 551 00:22:21,160 --> 00:22:25,980 My life is a life where I get to be of service to my wife. 552 00:22:25,980 --> 00:22:28,200 And I'm a full-time caretaker. 553 00:22:28,200 --> 00:22:32,560 And I take care of her, and some days are good days, 554 00:22:32,560 --> 00:22:35,500 and some days are not such good days. 555 00:22:35,500 --> 00:22:38,720 But I stood up and show up no matter what, 556 00:22:38,720 --> 00:22:41,800 because that's what I was taught in Alcoholics Anonymous. 557 00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:44,600 This wasn't what I was planning on talking about, 558 00:22:44,600 --> 00:22:48,000 and I don't even know why I'm talking about all of this, 559 00:22:48,000 --> 00:22:51,640 but the main thing is, guys, 560 00:22:51,640 --> 00:22:55,580 is that we stay sober on good days and bad days. 561 00:22:55,580 --> 00:22:58,120 And we surround ourselves with people 562 00:22:58,120 --> 00:23:01,080 that are working a program that we can lean on, 563 00:23:01,080 --> 00:23:02,560 no matter what. 564 00:23:02,560 --> 00:23:06,440 There's people in this room that I can call up 24/7. 565 00:23:06,440 --> 00:23:09,380 I could call up Pete and say, "Pete, I need your help." 566 00:23:09,380 --> 00:23:12,200 And he'll drive or fly from Los Angeles 567 00:23:12,200 --> 00:23:14,480 all the way to Vegas to help me out. 568 00:23:14,480 --> 00:23:16,680 Pete was the one that grabbed my son 569 00:23:16,680 --> 00:23:18,520 and put him on an airplane with him 570 00:23:18,520 --> 00:23:23,300 and showed up on my doorstep on Christmas Day last year, 571 00:23:23,300 --> 00:23:25,680 and surprised the hell out of us. 572 00:23:25,680 --> 00:23:29,440 And my wife was so happy, and we had a great visit, 573 00:23:29,440 --> 00:23:31,820 and from then, it's gotten better and better. 574 00:23:31,820 --> 00:23:34,720 Not to say that I don't have challenges in my life. 575 00:23:34,720 --> 00:23:35,760 I go to meetings. 576 00:23:35,760 --> 00:23:38,680 I go to meetings whether I want to 577 00:23:38,680 --> 00:23:40,360 or whether I don't want to. 578 00:23:40,360 --> 00:23:42,760 I don't go to meetings for convenience. 579 00:23:42,760 --> 00:23:45,800 I go to meetings because I need to go to meetings. 580 00:23:45,800 --> 00:23:48,040 I need to see the guy, that's my warning. 581 00:23:48,040 --> 00:23:51,880 I need to see the guy that I thought was doing well come back 582 00:23:51,880 --> 00:23:53,440 and I need to know what happens 583 00:23:53,440 --> 00:23:55,120 to people that don't come back. 584 00:23:55,120 --> 00:23:58,800 And I need to see my friends doing well in sobriety. 585 00:23:58,800 --> 00:24:01,240 Tammy, Pete, my friend Sean. 586 00:24:01,240 --> 00:24:03,900 Sean didn't talk about what he really is. 587 00:24:03,900 --> 00:24:08,120 Sean, when I heard Sean, not only was he a babbling fool, 588 00:24:08,120 --> 00:24:11,480 but he was a degenerate and a menace to society. 589 00:24:11,480 --> 00:24:13,960 This guy, he talked about the first blackout 590 00:24:13,960 --> 00:24:15,980 where he ran his thing into a tree. 591 00:24:15,980 --> 00:24:18,120 This guy has no business driving. 592 00:24:18,120 --> 00:24:20,720 I would never ride with this guy had I not. 593 00:24:20,720 --> 00:24:23,280 Now, I'll tell you what, according to Sean, 594 00:24:23,280 --> 00:24:24,860 I'm a penny waste drunk. 595 00:24:24,860 --> 00:24:27,420 And he should have been the one that was born in Harlem. 596 00:24:27,420 --> 00:24:29,160 And I should have been the one that was 597 00:24:29,160 --> 00:24:32,280 in Lake Tahoe, California, you know what I mean? 598 00:24:32,280 --> 00:24:35,820 But the thing is, is how we find commonality 599 00:24:35,820 --> 00:24:39,080 is I have no idea, but I love this guy. 600 00:24:39,080 --> 00:24:41,400 I owe my sobriety to him and Adam. 601 00:24:41,400 --> 00:24:44,180 These guys have saved me on a daily basis. 602 00:24:44,180 --> 00:24:46,360 I go on Wednesday, I go to Zoom meeting. 603 00:24:46,360 --> 00:24:48,720 I go to see these other guys, Glenn. 604 00:24:48,720 --> 00:24:52,540 Glenn drove two hours from his house in Arizona 605 00:24:52,540 --> 00:24:54,720 to come to our Saturday morning meeting 606 00:24:54,720 --> 00:24:56,080 so that I could give him a chip 607 00:24:56,080 --> 00:24:58,800 for his 40 years of sobriety, right? 608 00:24:58,800 --> 00:25:00,880 If he can do it, I can do it. 609 00:25:00,880 --> 00:25:03,060 If I can do it, you can do it. 610 00:25:03,060 --> 00:25:06,640 And so what I need to say is, in closing, 611 00:25:06,640 --> 00:25:09,940 is that my best friend, Ron Coleman, 612 00:25:09,940 --> 00:25:12,520 I'll never forget, he gave a great talk. 613 00:25:12,520 --> 00:25:15,920 And he had this line that he would end every talk with. 614 00:25:15,920 --> 00:25:18,840 And I said, when he was in the hospital, "Hey Ron, 615 00:25:18,840 --> 00:25:21,080 "is it okay if I steal that line?" 616 00:25:21,080 --> 00:25:22,740 And he goes, "Yeah, Tom, it's okay 617 00:25:22,740 --> 00:25:24,760 "as long as you give me credit." 618 00:25:24,760 --> 00:25:28,640 And so, as my best friend Ron Coleman used to say, 619 00:25:28,640 --> 00:25:30,240 I used to wake up in the morning 620 00:25:30,240 --> 00:25:32,000 and say, "Good God, it's morning." 621 00:25:32,000 --> 00:25:34,840 But today I wake up and I say, "Good morning, God." 622 00:25:34,840 --> 00:25:36,920 Thank you for letting me share, I'm back.