Katie's Family Journey Through Recovery

Hello there. I'm Katie. I'm an alcoholic.

I'm going to get centered here for a minute.

First of all, thank you for having me.

I just wanted to hear that again.

I want to thank Oscar for asking me to share

and to tell you my story.

First of all, let me just get out of the way.

I am literally exhausted at the same time.

I went last night, or yesterday,

I went to India with my family to speak at the

ABC Recovery Center.

There were 50 of us that were infected.

We went and participated.

It was great.

I got in.

I had the time of my life.

I was standing on all days,

straight from there.

It was all a stupid area,

so I can't promise you exactly

what I'm going to do today.

It's been good because it's not

too severely like this.

And then I've been having a lot of coffee

outside until now.

I just wanted to clear the air,

go down there.

I feel like I can go home.

I've already had so much.

Thank you so much.

Thank you, Dan.

Your shares were excellent.

My story and your share is very different

from most of yours.

I also really can't describe everything

I have to say about the amazing things

about this program.

The ability to believe

in purpose and the feelings

that are going on with it.

So, we'll see.

My sobriety date was July, 1997.

My answer is

to be a W and

send you a meeting

with a speaker.

You could see.

Sorry.

I have one for the staring at me right now.

Sometimes I draw a blank

and then have it.

Let's see.

I don't know.

I'm

in some family

of alcoholics.

I will just start off.

You should mix it in.

So, I just think, you know,

I've been married

since I was in the family.

Yeah.

I have, you know,

girls and

and

people that are

and also that are

active in their family.

And so, you know, it was just

a suggestion.

And

I didn't even realize it until, you know,

it's absolutely

my plan for alcoholics.

And starting to hear

my family members tell me

my father was an alcoholics.

But other plans, you know,

you know,

you know,

Sam died

in my 1950s.

Hearing the things

I should do, I was like,

that's mean.

And it was telling my story.

So, it's, you know, just kind of amazing.

Yeah, there's

a huge family.

So, a lot of, you know,

in the family. So, yeah, just

interesting family dynamics.

But my family,

she got so big

before I was born.

She has been

so, you know,

active in the family.

See, as a kid,

you know,

I was a very little child.

And, um,

I was a sweet boy.

I was born on the street.

If you made fun of me,

I would cry.

You know,

sitting in the stands, right?

So, I mean,

it was a very, very big party.

And it was very,

I think it was,

I went to school.

And they had a song

about me being a puppy dog.

And they would sing,

how much is that,

and they would sing

one or two songs.

You know,

it was a very big party.

You know,

it was a really big time,

I think.

So, you know,

it was a really big time.

Any other questions?

Yes?

Female question?

Ah,

Len,

you can jump in.

Thank you so much for joining me today.

you know, stop pretty much at that point. I had also grown out of it, you know, started to

and I started to become somewhat accepted by the populace now. My first killing auntie was

one of the most popular people in the house. She was spending a minute at my house

and she was pretty bad about it. We could tell as though there was some fighting that we had

and I just kind of sat there. No one really knew me. So my friend, you know, she spent the night.

I also happened to have some kind of issues in the thread. Yeah, I started thinking, I mean,

there would be extremes. I think there would be for it, like screen time. I never, I never

used to do it that much. I mean, you know, some of the extremes I would always think about. So I

knew these things would happen.

But, you know, we knew it was just for the criminal issues. And I thought she knew how to

talk to me. And I was really shocked about it. And, you know, talking with those is as natural

as breathing. And we think maybe it's just a little bit of something. And I feel since I

discovered you can just take a little bit back and put up a puzzle. And so that's how I changed.

And I don't know why I'm looking at that way. I'm trying to get a

passion.

But that's, that's, that's just about it. Because I was, I was trying, I was used to watch,

I was sort of come out of my shell. I, you know, I like to fancy myself a pretty funny person,

pretty witty, so nervous to be able to post out my humor on you guys, because I was so shy.

I would put that inside me really thinking, like, I wish everybody could help.

But, you know, it took me years, but I got things that were actual, you

can't just go on and on about myself, to say like, how funny I was, and how funny I was.

And everything, like, gosh, I was great.

You know, I used all my best material and I just, you know, I was funny.

And I sprouted.

And even, generally, like they, this girl, she talked about me and she was so nice that

I could pretend how funny, how great I was that night, that I could help out.

So I went so strong, so I lets out.

But, yeah.

And I wasn't tired at all.

It could be.

Joni Okay.

All of that, my chance for all of that, and I had no idea why.

I didn't realize until years later that I was going to have one and done it.

Because, you know, to, uh, you know, I think it's, uh, I just, for me, it's a position I was in.

It's amazing. I think I was really, really sick.

Um, I think until I got alcoholics, I was in the first term, I was very, but I was trying to hide it from my parents, so I just stopped.

And, um, I think she got away with it, but then, um, I was going to meet her at a facility with some friends.

And at the time, you know, there was, you know, just the same thing as house, and your parents could put a gun on you.

So I got caught that way, and I think I got grounded for a moment or something.

Um, so I was doing these things in my high school years.

Like, I was doing something wrong.

Um, so that was my first job.

Um, and before, I think Dan said it, you know.

I guess I wasn't.

And it's easy to get some worries, obviously.

So I ended up starting to come down and, you know, you know, I was trying to find a job.

I think I was going to be able to make it through time.

I think I was going to make it through time, but I couldn't get out of the door.

You know, so I was going through strength.

I actually really cared about school.

I, I, you know, I cared about what my teachers thought of me or what I thought of school.

So that's how I lost all interest.

Um, I really lost interest in anything.

And that's what seriously interested me.

And my third purpose was, you know, how can I get back again?

How can I get high again?

Um, and, you know, I was thinking about it, because I think it's really sad.

Um, and it just, uh, it was telling me, you know, the solutions are all in my head.

It seems really quickly that I started to deteriorate.

Like I mentioned, I need to fill my drink.

Almost every time I drink, I click out.

And, gee, well, when you do that.

I'm just, you know, trouble seems to fall.

And I always thought it was a coincidence that the police showed up.

Like, you know, it's, you know, what is up with that?

There was such a police presence.

You know, but, you know, it was me.

I told them there, because I was so lazy.

Um, they were like, you know, the pictures on, um, uh, the tequila meets with folks.

Well, I thought that was, you know, my experience.

You know what I'm saying?

And, you know, gosh, yeah.

Um, I just felt like I didn't need it to, you know, fill me with myself.

You know, it was, you know.

And, you know, like, oh, here's a little sterile.

I was straight there.

Um, but, you know, it seems like that led to these presents.

I was also, you know, like, in a space.

And, you know, at the time, it was something I wanted to do.

And, um, let's see.

And, you know, I started getting arrested type of thing.

And I started to draw the radar on my parents.

Um, you know, I was, you know, starting to have a problem.

Um.

Like I mentioned, my dad is, you know, she is also, um, an investment manager.

So, it's a bit of a lie.

So, you know, it's going to get shut on to me.

So, they started interviewing me for programs.

Um, I was especially put me in.

I said, like, as you're wasting money.

I'm going to put it in a little bit.

Basically, I'm just changing my settings.

Um, I just remember being anxious in the game.

Because.

You know.

It's been really nice to reach in.

Um.

But, I guess I may read.

Um.

So.

Um.

One first in school.

And I believe.

I'm going to be.

GPA of 0.00.

Yeah.

I think I'll make it twice.

Um.

Even when it's a regular high school.

It's a continuation school.

Even going to school.

Um.

And.

Um.

Doing the same.

And my alma mater, I think, is a hospital.

and I'll have it.

And probably, you know,

high school is transferred

and it's been changed here.

It's been marked up all the way.

And so to that intersection,

a person that didn't know me

is very much a believer in high school.

Sorry.

Like I said,

this is like the weirdest thing

that came to me was very much.

But yeah,

you know,

it's been starting to transform

in the early days.

You know,

right now,

the reality is

that's where things are

my friends,

they all do.

And, you know,

so sometimes,

like,

when things happen,

you know,

to, you know,

people,

there's also that situation.

And so, you know,

types of things happen to me.

Like I mentioned,

I got an genocide.

I fell in love

at the age of 16.

You know,

I just,

yeah,

I mean,

yes,

I was,

I think,

17 and he was 19.

That's what we did.

It's just,

I was 14

and he was like 27.

So,

yeah,

you know,

like in our descent,

we were able to use

a chartering badge.

We stayed together

for four years.

He was really

mentally and emotionally abusive.

He was very,

very,

and that's just

what I thought

I deserved at the time.

Yeah,

like I mentioned,

I was still

in ninth grade

twice.

I was

myself with these

really just

people that didn't

have my best interest

at church.

And I hear

when you

age of 16

and

I felt like

it gives

and I've been

through some

like children facilities

and my parents

were so on to me.

And so,

you know,

I felt like

let's give this a try.

So together

we're fine.

I didn't tell my parents.

And I didn't tell a lot of people.

So I actually

get to,

you know,

stimulate some

finding sobriety

around the age of 16.

And at the time,

I had started

going to AA meetings,

getting introduced

to young people

in AA.

And those

people,

people,

they were

officially sober.

And when I had

inside,

and they were

happy,

like genuinely

happy.

And they seemed

genuinely

concerned about me.

And they seemed

like they wanted

to be with me.

And so these

people I was around,

you know,

it was like my sense.

But then I would go

and hang out

with these other people

that were giving me

the best,

I think,

my best interest

at church.

I was still

with that guy,

you know,

I think,

on a big face.

And, you know,

I was living

these two lives.

And, you know,

also my character,

being sad as me.

And that was

telling me,

because I love my parents.

I have so much

respect for them.

They're my best friends.

And they made

clear that I was

lying to them.

So,

I was 18,

I was 97.

And it was so big,

excuse me,

I was telling myself,

like,

let's not just

give this a try.

You know,

I'm 13,

and, you know,

the other things

they just didn't

look at me.

It's just

crazy.

It's crazy.

I started so young,

but anyway,

I'm 35 years.

It's just,

I didn't really

used to do this to me.

At least,

I didn't.

I didn't change

if I got fine.

I didn't want to shut up

while I was paranoid.

I just,

you know,

I just,

I just,

I just,

I'm not doing this.

So,

you know,

let's just give this thing a go.

Let's,

you know,

let's try sobriety.

So,

I'm in this,

you know,

I had ditched that guy

at the time.

Just really thinking,

you know,

I'm going to get married.

I'm going to try to change.

I'm going to continue

my wedding.

I had no prospects.

I was a shot mess.

You know,

you saw me.

I was,

you know,

I was in bed.

And,

you know,

I just thought,

you know what?

Maybe I can.

Maybe I can't.

So,

you know,

I just had to keep it

really small.

Today,

I'm not going to drink

or eat.

And,

you know,

we started sitting

somewhere together.

And,

you know,

like I said,

July 11th,

97th,

is,

you know,

when the wind was

blowing,

the thought came to me

and,

gosh,

I've been able to stay

sober ever since.

I did it,

like I mentioned,

I got really active

and really quick.

You know,

I attended a lot of meetings.

I got a sponsor.

You get all this

fun activities

that you do

in Young People AA.

When I was 60 days,

I went to

a convention

in Young People AA

in Toronto.

And that's where

I really started

to feel the way I was.

And I found it.

It was an experience

for a young,

sober person.

And,

I remember that.

It really set me

in this path

as a 10-year-old.

And,

like I said,

my schooling

was a joke.

I had gone to

Catholic school

previously.

And,

you know,

I started my school

and I was so good.

I think it was

like a really easy

study.

I,

I,

I mean,

I think I just

found the answers

in the back of the book.

I mean,

it would be an

assignment.

It was really

shocking.

And I did also

use just a couple

of hands

and I'm glad

that I didn't

like to do it.

So,

yeah,

it's crazy.

But,

but it's when

I got sober

and I didn't know

what I wanted

to do with my life.

I was a nurse.

And,

I was,

at the time

I was a kid,

she was a health nurse

so she would take me

with her to visit

her patients.

And,

she would invite me

to,

you know,

to the hospital

and I would keep

talking and

I felt like

maybe this is

something I could do.

I wouldn't suggest

starting nursing school

at 60 or so

much,

but,

after that

I just felt like

I was,

you know,

I would do

something greater.

So,

my sister had,

and my sister,

I didn't go to

see this,

I was a little child.

So,

I was kind of

a little slown.

My sister was

a personality

and basically

whatever she would

tell me to do,

I would,

you know,

if I found out

I found it

to be just like

a little sister.

But,

yeah,

my relationship was

you know,

like a little

shadow.

You know,

I'd say that

I was gosh,

yesterday

we started

raising,

we just got

sentenced to

three years

in prison.

At the same time,

I remember

that that would be

my,

you know,

people in my past

were still

training in prison.

So,

you know,

I was on the side

now,

but,

um,

um,

so I don't think

this is a tale

that's getting

me published.

So,

you know,

yeah,

I was just,

I was kind of

losing it.

I didn't do anything,

you know,

I,

I,

I didn't,

I shouldn't

use it.

My sister said,

can you

just forget it

at the end?

You know,

I didn't,

so I said,

okay.

So,

we went to this

school in

Bundy,

and,

you know,

it was great

because I had

my real education,

but when I started,

and I actually

did a good job,

which I was

really surprised by,

and I fell in love

with this

and I was

missing.

I started

school,

I got my

life

all started,

and I

was

97,

yeah,

I had something

I was serving

and started

and graduating.

I was at

a 15-month program,

graduated,

graduated in

98,

and,

you know,

turned really

much at that point.

I mean,

I got really

active in

the,

you know,

see those

sponsors,

but I

didn't

really do

those

things

except

on

book

books.

I think I

wrote first,

second,

and third,

and I just

felt really

like spiritually

grounded.

I just

didn't

think of

it as

good.

And I

remember

there was

some

big event,

like some

thing,

somebody was

having a

study,

still writing,

I don't know

what she

does,

and I

started

disarming

these

elements,

and I was

talking to my dad,

and I was

telling my dad,

like,

and I said this,

my dad had been

angry for me

for years at this

point.

He was also

an enforcement,

and I was

one of his

buddies,

and they

said,

like,

oh,

the gym

is so

complicated,

I'd be

on my

sense,

right?

And they

made something

of me as a

sergeant.

I was like,

oh,

you need

this

really

quickly.

They were

telling me

all these

things,

and I was

like,

oh,

my God,

yeah,

basically on a

resentment,

I was

really

feeling

like this.

And the

funny thing

about me,

you should

know,

I used

my dad's

expense

to figure

out

the

way

to

sign

your

form.

I said,

if I

get

the

dealership,

I'm

going

up

there.

They

finally

showed me

a

full

bench,

and $15,000

are in

mine.

So I

was

thinking,

I'm

going

to

do

military.

And they

have

an

expense

on

me.

This

was

the

incursions

of a

young

girl.

So,

you know,

I did

know,

I didn't

know

me.

I

needed

to

do

some

training

around

the

world.

I

did

those

too.

I

was

like,

second

year,

I was

second

year,

third

cycle

of

females,

the

joint

sergeants

there,

infantry

post,

and

children

testing.

I

didn't

know

what

to

do

with

this.

I

was

like,

John,

please.

I

didn't

know

what

it was.

It

was

an

experience

I

had

learned.

I

thought

that

family

could

do

BS.

It

was

like,

I

really

need

BS

my

way

to

do

it.

It

was

like,

Amy

Strides.

Within

like,

six

months

of being

an

administrative

.

You're

supposed

to know

something

about

the

colony.

I

really

didn't

know

what

I

was

going

to do.

I

didn't

know

what

I was

going

to do.

I

didn't

know

what

I was

going

to do.

I

didn't

know

what

I was

going to

do.

So,

I

got

here

four

years

ago.

I

was

pretty

cute

actually.

We have an awesome nursing job here.

We have an awesome nursing job here.

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with her channel. She was a speaker, and it was Christiana Steele. She was no joke. She

was a very good speaker, and, you know, I, I really got to know her, and it was just

starting to, you know, it was, it has to be, you know, it was, you know, it saved my life.

So, thank you for all the broad steps. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I,

I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I,

I love you all so much, and then, you know, when not she is.

And I'm going to die, and let's see, until then, I'm going to be a screen reader,

and I'm going to be a witness, and I'm going to be a sponsor, and I'm going to be everything today.

I'm going to be a witness in happiness that I have, like, I didn't bring it right down to the ground.

Like, I literally, like, we got stuff that I was doing, like, it's really my stress.

Like, I didn't get all these things.

I just said, you know, it's not what it seems.

So, you know, and that's what really, it's so funny.

It's, you know, it was actually, and you're starting to see that I wasn't blind.

And that was not a fear with me, you know, because it was, you know, I had, I'm not sure,

I'm not sure, that's why I cared about it.

But I was starting to kind of see the side that I wasn't doing.

So, you know, that's when I thought, you know, people are really, you know, they're not blind, you know.

And I didn't realize, because I was so good, I had this killer resume.

And I realized, you know what, a resume is just a piece of paper.

It's just, you know, it can, it can be like I'm flying away.

And so I realized, you know, my wife, it's like, it's just the same.

And I realized it so quickly.

And I didn't surrender.

I didn't surrender.

I didn't surrender.

I didn't do something.

So, I mean, I surrendered and it took direction.

Like I mentioned, I was doing these things and God made it happen to me.

I got a dream job.

And, you know, the way I got that, I don't want to take up too much of your time.

But, you know, there's been several of them.

And why did I not?

I can't say that.

I didn't.

But I know it.

I know it.

But that's it.

I know it.

So, wait, wait a minute.

I just thought my higher path process, I had to do this in teaching classes and sometimes

people that I meet and stares.

I know, I really, I listened to what they were saying.

I was like, I want to speak that out for me.

So, I'm going to say that out for me.

I was like, no, it's this guy.

But I got a new higher quality.

I made some solid credits for that job, and I got it.

And, you know, I met somebody.

I had, you know, not been in a friend's relationship.

I had a relationship with a friend that I had.

I had a relationship with a friend that I had.

And I met a friend at the end.

And, you know, two years ago, I was able to, like, this, like,

stars all over my head, and I was able to, like, go into his house.

And I love making videos so much.

And I was able to buy the house with, you know, some opportunities that I had.

And I built this house with my husband.

And, gosh, I really, really can't stand it for myself.

Just a few years back, I was able to send it to myself at the age of 18.

I was, you know,

Oh, my gosh.

Yes.

Like, I'm like,

Like I said, I'm not exactly great at that.

So I know the team.

I need to communicate to my student audience.

So I went through a lot of thesis when I was going to make things.

I was going to be.

I didn't know where everybody was around at the time.

I was, like, a screen dish.

I was, like,

I was gonna say,

I was gonna say,

I was, like,

I was, like,

I was, like,

I was, like,

I was, like,

I was, like,

I was, like,

I was, like,

I was, like,

I was, like,

I was, like,

So, yeah, like, these, you know, my fiancé is, you know, you know, because I had, you know, got really good, especially after getting married, like, eventually got, I had my, I mean, I mean, a lot, but as long as I have been, you know, because, you know, I, you know, I have a lot of savings, you know.

I just wanted to stay home with you.

That's why your life's good.

I just can't adjust enough.

I am exhausted.

I, you know, but I had a, so, you know, I'm sorry, but I get to do it on my own, guys.

You know, I'm going to sleep in a regular bed.

I'm going to sleep in a regular bed.

I'm going to sleep in a regular bed.

And I'm going to sleep in a regular bed.

And I'm just, thank you all for having me.