Stuart's Journey: From Early Drinking to Sobriety and a Kahlua Wake‑up Call
S20:E06

Stuart's Journey: From Early Drinking to Sobriety and a Kahlua Wake‑up Call

Episode description

Stuart, a third‑generation member of Alcoholics Anonymous, recounts his mixed‑racial upbringing, early start with alcohol at age 12, and the path to sobriety at 18. He shares his disciplined early recovery routine and the moment a hidden bottle of Kahlua in a coffee cup threatened his progress.

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0:00

Now I would like to introduce our main speaker

0:03

Stuart hey, hey good evening. I'm Stuart. I'm an alcoholic

0:07

I'm gonna take this off because it got hot that 20 minutes. It's not only gonna get hotter. I know it. Um, no, I'll just drape it

0:15

Oh sure. Thanks, brother. Um, I want to thank Alex for asking me to come out and share with you

0:19

He's the responsible party notice. He's not here, right? Yeah

0:23

But you know who to blame

0:28

the way this happened is uh

0:30

Let me start with my sobriety dates February 4th 1985

0:33

my sponsors Ken Jacobson and

0:36

Sunday night, Ohio is my home group

0:39

Yeah, so, uh, Alex had Marty stuck up scheduled to speak a few months back

0:45

I don't know if he's been out here since then but Marty had a medical procedure and he wasn't able to speak

0:50

So being the good a that he is he gave Alex my number as well as a few others

0:56

And so when Alex worked in list, I wasn't able to speak back then but Alex being the good alcoholic secretary that he is

1:03

But do you mind if I book you for later? And so here you have it. Um, I met Bruce first time and

1:10

That was out here earlier with oh, you're Mary's husband, right? That's what it's come to an alcoholics anonymous for me

1:18

I'm Mary's husband and apparently Bruce and Mary are good friends on Facebook or I should say friends on Facebook

1:25

I don't know how good of friends but um, you know for many years and alcoholics anonymous

1:30

I was Matt Johnson's nephew or you could say I was Hank Johnson's grandson or you could say I was Lou Johnson's grandson

1:37

What that means is I'm third generation alcoholics anonymous

1:41

My grandparents got sober in 1970. My uncle got sober in 1973. They got sober in a little group called the Pacific group

1:49

I don't think any of you've ever heard of that, right? Yeah, and

1:55

You know

1:56

Growing up for me born and raised in Los Angeles. I'm a product of an interracial marriage. My mother's white

2:02

Hence, that's how Matt Johnson's my uncle

2:05

And my father's mix. My father was Filipino Portuguese American Indian and black

2:10

but his birth certificate and mine as well say Negro and I was born in 66 and

2:16

That wasn't a good time to have mixed ethnic background

2:23

It's a good time now, but it wasn't a good time then

2:25

So I heard it all, you know what the grade school in Hollywood the summer of 6th and 7th grade

2:32

My mom decided to move us out of Hollywood into the San Fernando Valley to a town called Tohonga

2:38

Yeah, so what I heard was we're moving it to Panga. Okay. Yeah, and when the trucks pulled up to Tohonga

2:44

I went what the right and you know

2:47

I always talk about that as a significant time of my life because I was I don't know how old he in sixth grade

2:52

exactly, and and I started drinking on a regular basis about 12 and

2:56

I've been thinking about this because I remember when I came in they used to say you're

3:01

Your emotional growth is stunted

3:05

To the time that you started drinking

3:07

So what that means is when I got sober at 18 and Alcoholics Anonymous

3:12

I had the emotional maturity of a 12 year old right and somebody. Oh, what was the

3:19

our speaker or second ten minute speaker said something about she did everything late that that that rang a bell with me because

3:25

That summer of 12 years old. I knew that normal kids didn't drink and do other things the way that I did

3:34

So when we made that move to Tohonga

3:36

I made a conscious effort to as my old man used to say hit the books

3:40

Stay on the straight and narrow and be a good kid. You know what I mean?

3:43

and that lasted for about two weeks, so I got invited to my first kegger party and

3:48

Once I met the new guys and once I started drinking the beer it was on and like Donkey Kong

3:52

you know and it never slowed down from 12 to 18 I

3:57

our first speaker was talking about

4:00

Outside issues when I asked over the we didn't call him outside issues, but we'll just say this that I'm no stranger

4:07

And you know I got sober at 18. They used to say things like kid. I've spilled more than you drink

4:14

I used to say well. I didn't spill they used to say you know you haven't hit bottom

4:18

if you still have a watch you know all that kind of stuff and

4:21

You know the Pacific group was my go-to obviously I but I didn't go in a hundred percent I

4:29

Used to go to meetings here in the valley at the time

4:32

White oak and Van Owen right used to be the nest and it was up on the second floor and downstairs was liquor store

4:39

And then right around the corner was Arturo's pizza, and I used to work at Arturo's pizza when I was 16 still in them at

4:45

all but when I got sober I would go to the nest and

4:48

Maybe another Valley meeting like the hole in the sky

4:51

and then the other four nights of the week that I went to meetings I would go to Pacific group meetings and

4:56

It was really a weird time because that first six months of sobriety I

5:02

Went out I I got you know into that Pacific group regiment get up go to work

5:09

Shower change go to a meeting

5:11

Go out for fellowship afterwards go home amped up on coffee sit up look at the ceiling until about 2 in the morning

5:17

Go to sleep get up go to work and and that first 28 days sobriety

5:22

It was cool

5:23

But what happened was I had a friend who was in town who had come back from rehab in Northern, California

5:28

And her mom invited me to spend the night because she had her mom had put a dinner on

5:33

We had dinner and her mom's like honey. I wanted to spend the night and I was like well

5:37

I'm call my sponsor my sponsors like cool, and the next morning

5:41

What happened is I went up for a cup of coffee before I took off to work

5:45

And I couldn't find the sugar and so I'm like hey Joanne. Where's the sugar she's like it's in the kitchen, honey

5:50

Cabinet above the refrigerator couldn't find the sugar couldn't find the sugar, and I'm getting frustrated. I can't find the sugar

5:55

I mean you think this was like you know a major

5:58

You know national emergency or something and I looked up the third time in the same cabinet

6:03

And I saw the bottle of Kahlua and went oh, there's Kahlua right here. Just shot it in the coffee hit the lips and I went

6:10

Spit it all out in the sink and said whoa you can't have Kahlua right

6:15

That's got alcohol in it so I bolted on out of there went to work and went the whole day

6:19

Just put it out of my mind. I didn't drink you didn't drink you didn't swallow

6:22

You didn't drink you didn't drink and that night

6:23

I was at the nest and some guy got up who had gotten sober the same time

6:28

I did you know 30 you know we're going up coming up on 30 days, and he talked about how he went out and I went what?

6:33

What how and then I after the meeting I went downstairs to the payphone?

6:37

And I called my sponsor, and I said I had a sponsor at the time named Randy Randy Williams

6:41

And I told him what had happened, and I go what I didn't drink right and he said nope you did

6:46

And you have to set reset your date

6:48

I was like oh, this is bull man, and uh Randy at the time was sponsored by my uncle

6:52

So I called my uncle next right. I mean right go to the Supreme Court with this right and

6:57

You know I ran across my uncle, and he said yeah, you got to change your date

7:01

And he goes, but look at it like this Stu. It's just today

7:04

You only lost today, and uh and that was you know February 3rd, so

7:09

February 4th is my sobriety date now, and I haven't found it necessary to drink or use no matter what however

7:14

I have found it necessary to take myself will back

7:18

Ruin lots of good things make things hard on myself, but stay sober no matter what

7:27

So

7:28

Yeah, that was

7:30

18 I get sober. I'm in the Pacific group. I'm going to the watches. I'm going to the yard

7:36

I'm doing all that structured good home group stuff that you guys do here, and I can tell you guys do here because I

7:41

Recognize a bunch of faces. I've seen faces. I haven't seen in a long time. I see faces that I see at my other meetings

7:47

and

7:49

You know

7:51

Alcoholics anonymous and life was good to me

7:53

I mean I got a job at the studios when I was 18 in the stockroom of a studio. That's no longer around

8:00

And six months later. I was a apprentice sound editor, and you know sound editors worked on film in those days

8:07

We worked on 35 millimeter film, and I was the apprentice and I started moonlighting at another studio on Burbank, and it was a small

8:15

independently owned place

8:16

And they hired me as an assistant

8:18

and then their lead assistant had problems with cocaine and I came to work one day and this guy was running down the stairs as

8:24

I was coming up the stairs and

8:26

Steel reels of film were being flown at him as he was running out the building and she was saying and don't ever come back

8:32

You drug addict and she looked at me right there and said hey, we need a new lead assistant

8:37

Would you be interested in the job and you know it just worked out and next thing you know?

8:41

I was an assistant sound editor, and there was a guy in the alcoholics anonymous name Art Cole

8:46

And I like to say old-timers names when I am relate something that happened in my life and our Cole

8:52

I'm pretty sure it was art that said this no no no no it wasn't art

8:56

It was Barney Morris and Barney Morris used to say if I basically that the sentiment is if I inject my will

9:03

I'm gonna sell myself short right you heard that the whole thing where you write down your goals and alcoholics

9:09

anonymous write down ten goals and alcoholics anonymous put in an envelope and when you get your first year you open that envelope and

9:14

You'll see that your life has gone better than that ten goals Barney Morris. He was a

9:20

television anchorman for

9:22

ABC 7 and

9:24

Every four years he would have to renegotiate contracts, and he was a big shot in the Pacific group

9:29

You know a longtime sobriety not big shot

9:31

But you know what I mean everybody knew who he was and he used to speak a lot

9:34

He had a big deep voice kind of like Keith Carpenter and anyway

9:38

And his wife was is Carol, and I think she's still down in San Diego and anyway

9:44

Barney said when contracts come up. He doesn't negotiate

9:48

He just says give me the best deal you want to give me and I'll take it

9:51

And they just kept giving him more money and more money and more money

9:54

So they this lady hires me to be her lead assistant editor, and I'm gonna go in there

9:59

And I'm gonna ask for this I'm gonna and I had heard Barney speak at the Wednesday night meeting the week before this whole

10:05

Job opportunity came up, and I just I said no

10:08

I'm not gonna ask for crap and then when I showed up to take the job

10:11

It was freaking twice as much as I would have asked for I mean it was incredible

10:15

I couldn't believe it when I stopped Noel knows why I'm asking

10:18

855 okay because last time I spoke I was like oh, I've got five minutes so anyway um so

10:24

You know the motion picture

10:27

Industry was it was a trip

10:29

It was the 80s a lot of people were victim

10:33

victim a lot of people were

10:36

Well, okay. Yeah that too, but um

10:41

They were they were just caught up in the whole thing. You know like our first speaker said if

10:45

Everybody used cocaine in the 80s so there was a lot of that in the industry and a lot of people were going through rehab

10:52

and a lot of people were getting court-ordered and and

10:54

A lot of careers advance because other people were falling out due to drug and alcoholism. You know what I'm saying

11:00

I mean, and I like to think I was one of them

11:03

I mean, I just I stayed sober and went to my meetings the guy who owned the studio's daughter was sober

11:08

And we became friends we dated and then but I like to say I had my job before we dated

11:14

And then we didn't date for long

11:16

and then his second daughter the middle daughter who was like one of the

11:20

Two older sisters that ran the place she was sober and her husband was sober

11:24

So it was a really fun time in AA and work for me. I mean I got on my first airplane trip

11:30

That year that first year. I worked for them, and it was like hey, it's a four-day weekend

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Let's go to New York. You know we jumped on a red-eye

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We went to New York did the weekend came back

11:41

You know oh wow I mean we still smoked on airplanes

11:45

And you stood in the back and you talked to the crew and you smoked cigarettes, and it was it was awesome, and I

11:51

I

11:54

Met a woman in my home group. She's still sober

11:57

We married we had a daughter

12:00

I ruined the marriage we divorced I used to say when I got sober

12:04

I'm too young to be an alcoholic. I never had a career. I never had a wife

12:09

I know you know I've never been divorced and ever and they used to say yet

12:13

That's what they used to say and the yet happened

12:16

Married had the career had the divorce

12:20

And

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After we divorced I kind of floundered around I was in between studio jobs because of the seasonal hiatus and

12:31

I don't know which war it was in the desert broke off, and I had since got my high school GED

12:39

You know young alcoholic making his own decisions needless to say I didn't graduate high school

12:44

I

12:46

Did the continuation school? It's my choice. I I found out you could work and go to school at the same time my choice

12:53

And then I just said why was anybody want to go to school when they could work right?

12:57

And I just never went back to school

13:00

So um in a a we had a friend my wife

13:04

And I who had never got her high school diploma, and she was gonna go take the GED

13:09

But she was scared and she says hey Stu. I heard you don't have a diploma. Would you take the GED with me?

13:15

I'm like sure let's go and this is what I mean by things coming late right so

13:19

You know I don't know how old I was 22 23 I go with her to Fairfax

13:24

High we take a little test we come back the next week

13:26

We take another test and they look at both of us, and they say hey you guys can just go down and take the GED

13:31

You don't need to do any schooling, and so I'm like cool now

13:34

She's chomping at the bit to get me to go and I'm like yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

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Yeah, and so we do the testing and now that we know now that I know that we can go down and just take the time

13:44

Come on. Let's go take the test come on

13:45

Let's go take the test and her work won't let it let her skip her schedule won't allow it so I

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Can't handle anymore, so I go down and I take the test and I pass so hey

13:54

I got a GED right then that war breaks out and everybody's all you know yeah

13:58

so I go into the marine recruiter because I'm in between marriages and

14:02

In between jobs, and I enlist in the Marine Corps, and I enlist with the intent shit

14:08

I'm 28 already when I enlist that's you know 10 years older than the average recruit

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That's what I mean by doing things later

14:14

so

14:16

My intensely enlist in the reserves and continue to work in the studio go to a meetings

14:21

You know do the whole thing and then I'm like you know what it's only four years of your life

14:26

If you're gonna do it you might as well do the real deal right we had guys like Frank Jones in the Pacific group

14:30

Herb Jones in the Pacific group, they're dead

14:33

Frickin Harvey Ferguson he's still in the Pacific group

14:37

So we had all these Marine Corvettes, and I used to hear all these stories, and I said yeah

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Yeah, and so it ain't like that

14:45

but but you know before

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Before I shoved off to boot camp Clancy's looked at me, and he said hey kid see if you can keep your mouth shut

14:54

Do your tongue?

14:56

Yeah, right whatever and and at ten years sobriety. I shipped off to Marine Corps recruit Depot, San Diego

15:01

And you know it's a lot of it is what you see in the movies, right?

15:07

You know like freaking full metal jacket the drill instructor in your face, right?

15:10

But a lot of it isn't like

15:16

The dirty dozen yeah, that's what I was looking for the dirty dozen, right

15:20

I'm looking at Avery because he's a jarhead too, so anyway

15:24

You know that marine course all full of frickin morals honor courage commitment

15:30

DY's aren't frowned upon fighting is frowned upon. I'm like this isn't the Marine Corps

15:36

I signed up for but needless to say is the Marine Corps

15:39

And I did it and I did the first four years and my uncle said I was gonna be a lifer

15:44

and I said nope and I got out and I came back to the motion picture industry did that for a couple more years and

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Couldn't stand it. I couldn't stand what had happened

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my perception of what had happened and

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You know by this time. We're editing digitally on computers, and you know it's like whatever

16:01

So I reenlisted back in the Marine Corps. I didn't reenlist

16:05

I was still on orders, but I took active orders, and I became a Marine Corps recruiter, and you know I

16:12

98 I started going to the Monday night in Sino Hills meeting

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I don't know if anybody here has been there, but you know Vince Yeo started that meeting 25 years ago now and

16:20

You know when I started going to 98 it was only up

16:24

Maybe not not more than five years in existence, and I did that meeting for many years

16:31

As I was working in the industry again, and then when I took those orders for active duty

16:37

I made me a Marine Corps recruiter, which is why I took the orders, and they made me a Marine Corps recruiter right here in Glendale

16:43

California and I did another four and a half years in the Marines and I remember going through that

16:48

transition back from the two years that I was in the motion picture industry and and trying to find something else before I made the

16:55

Commitment to go back in the Marines, and I remember Chuck Bernard one Tuesday night

16:59

He finally just he said hey are you telling everybody about what you're trying to do just get a job

17:04

I mean, and that's nice. I mean he just any job just get a job already

17:08

and so so I was able to come back and say well back in the Marines and uh so I did that for another four and

17:14

a half years and

17:15

It was kind of weird. I had just made the commitment

17:19

I said you know I got nine and a half years active duty in the Marine Corps

17:21

I might as well go for 20 right I mean hey don't raise no quitters

17:25

So I said I'm gonna go for 20 and but you have to put paperwork in to do that

17:30

All right, you've got to put paperwork to go because I went from the active to the reserve component and now I'm gonna go back

17:35

To the active component for good and retire at 20 right that was my new goal

17:40

And as soon as I made that decision the Marine Corps forced me back to the reserves

17:44

Yeah, 90 days of pay and then you go back to the drilling reserves, right?

17:49

So I didn't get the paperwork in in time that happened life, so whatever

17:53

I needed a job. You know I needed a job

17:57

AA is rock-solid my life right um I am recruiting in Glendale

18:02

I had the opportunity to buy a condo in Glendale. I bought a condo in Glendale. I met a woman

18:07

That two years that I was trying to make it work again in the studios

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I met a woman at a star well at the

18:14

Store next to the Starbucks is where she worked and me and a business partner would meet at the Starbucks and have coffee every day

18:20

Pretty much, and we would see this gal doing her thing at this little boutique, and you know I would say to her

18:27

Hey, do you want to get together a Tuesday night?

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And she'd say I can't I have a commitment she wouldn't say what it was and she wouldn't say I had a commitment

18:34

But she had plans and then she go how about Wednesday and oh I can't do Wednesday right because I had the Wednesday night meeting

18:40

Right so we're playing this on and off for about six months

18:42

and then finally we hook up and we're able to go out and so now we're out on this date and

18:47

She says something to me, and I just went how long you been sober. She's like

18:51

14 months right so

18:54

We're she's a six-month newcomer working on her program

18:58

And I'm a 14 year sober person in the middle of my program right we're doing this

19:03

And we're trying to make it work, and we neither one of us knows that we're alcoholic right our pickers work

19:08

Even we're out there, so

19:10

So she and I started dating I go back in the Marines. I'm the Marine recruiter. We buy the condo together

19:17

She's we're getting serious. She's like you know

19:21

When are we getting married right? I don't know how it comes up, but something like that right the subject of marriage comes up

19:27

And I go I go not until I get staff sergeant cuz I'm a sergeant in the Marines right

19:30

And I'm like not until I get staff sergeant

19:32

And we play this game for about three years

19:34

And she just looks at me and she goes the Marine Corps is never gonna make you staff sergeant when we're gonna get married

19:38

Or in I go I go how about this date?

19:39

I got this weekend off right so we go to Vegas our moms come to Vegas

19:43

She has a friend on the program come I have a friend of the Marines come and my daughter from my previous marriage is there so

19:51

We have a little thing up in Vegas on the weekend, and now we're married

19:54

it's Marion Stewart show right and we buy a house and

19:57

04 and then she gets pregnant or maybe she's pregnant already

20:02

But we buy the house, and then we move into the house, and then we have our first daughter

20:07

Which is my second daughter, and then you know we're done. We're cool life is good. We're you know doing a I'm working

20:15

also the Marine Corps forcing you back to the reserves in oh six a couple years after we bought the house and

20:21

I need a job, and you know tinker in with going back to the film industry

20:26

But I really don't want to go back to the film industry so I put an application with the sheriff's department now

20:30

I don't really want to be a deputy sheriff

20:32

but I had a sergeant on the sheriff's department the whole time I was a marine recruiter trying to get me into the

20:37

Sheriff's department and so after four and a half years of telling kids you got to keep your options open

20:43

I go you know what better not gamble 100% on the sheriff's department. You should put an application in with LAPD

20:50

Which I do and so you know I'm still active duty Marine Corps

20:54

So I get to wear the alphas with you know not the blue one, but the green one

20:57

You know the cops like that stuff. You know and you're sitting there and and next thing you know boom

21:02

I'm in LAPD's Academy, and I'm in LAPD's Academy

21:06

And then I get a phone call from the sheriff's department offered me an opportunity in their Academy

21:10

And I'm telling them um I kind of made a six-month commitment if it doesn't work out. Can I call you you know and so?

21:16

that's how I became a cop and

21:20

Yeah, that's how I became a cop and and really standing here 35 years sober everything in my life

21:27

It's God's will right because every time I try to inject my will nothing ever happens

21:32

Nothing good like Tinkerbell said nothing good could come of this, but um so

21:37

you know it was hard waiting for LAPD to offer me the job and

21:42

Living off my savings after that last paycheck from the Marine Corps came

21:48

It was so hard that I went to the social services office on

21:52

San Fernando and Glendale San Fernando Pacific

21:56

Me my wife and our one-year-old child and we went in and we tried to sign up for you know benefits, right?

22:03

I mean, it's a variety right. I mean and

22:05

We got told we had too much man. I mean

22:08

We had 14 grand in our savings account. We had on two cars

22:12

We owned a house, and they said come back when you're broke, and I'm like

22:18

Because I'm doing the math man and that 14 grand with unemployment ain't gonna last much longer

22:22

You know what I'm saying, but you know again God's will right God's

22:27

We just took the steps

22:30

we just went through the motions the next indicated thing and then I got the job offer you know and and the

22:36

the Marine Corps medical benefits we're gonna

22:39

We're gonna expire

22:42

Health you know health insurance, and I found something that said when a marine is involuntarily

22:49

Terminated his orders are involuntarily terminated, and he's sent back to his reserves

22:53

He's entitled to another six months of benefits, and you know I mean I called that major back

22:57

And I say hey mage I was involuntarily separated right yes, you were staff sergeant or no. I was sergeant at time. Yes, sir

23:03

Yes, yes sergeant

23:04

I said cool because I found this thing and he amended the paperwork and I got six more months of benefits and those six

23:10

months of benefits

23:12

Overlapped with the first month of the LAPD benefits. You know what I mean, so you know my mind says

23:18

Oh, we're in a drastic situation and nothing good is gonna come of this and my higher power has never let me down so

23:24

You know I go into LAPD's Academy. They give you this little piece of paper. They say hey starting late

23:31

I was 40 when I went to LAPD's Academy

23:34

And we had an academy class of 70 something people and out of the top 10 runners in that class

23:40

It was myself another guy who was 40 another guy was all prior service military

23:44

It was cool, but um we we get we're in the Academy

23:48

And they tell you you know write out your goals

23:49

And it was graduate the Academy make probation and become a motor officer and maybe a sergeant

23:56

I can tell you I don't want to be a sergeant in LAPD

23:58

so

24:01

My first 10 years of LAPD was pretty much a collision investigator

24:04

You know I did a year in patrol, and then I went over to

24:08

Traffic and I was a collision investigator here for five years in the San Fernando Valley

24:12

I was on probation handling a collision right in front of this building on Sherman Way

24:17

And I stayed in the reserves. I stayed in the Marine Corps reserves. I

24:23

Earned a rank of staff sergeant. I was promoted to the rank of staff sergeant, and you know I thought well

24:28

I'm I'll retire as a gunnery sergeant. That was my goal stay in the Marines till they promote me to gunny

24:33

I'll become gunny highway

24:35

right gunny highway with darker complexion and uh and

24:39

and when I get 20 satisfactory years you know I'll retire and

24:45

I was in the Marine Corps reserve. I just done a

24:49

Exercise in Okinawa Japan, and I came back to Conus

24:53

And I was in Texas waiting to fly back to LA and they called me into the admin office

24:58

And they told me we're forcing you out to the individual ready reserves

25:01

That's the reserve component where you don't do nothing you just you're on paper in the reserves and that made it harder for me to

25:07

Get gunnery sergeant, and I was doing the paperwork and gonna

25:10

Stick it out till I made a gunny and retire after I got 20 sat years out so in math time

25:16

It would have been five to seven more years

25:18

And I had the paperwork in and they had me at this thing they were doing all these PowerPoint things

25:23

And I just said nope does that doesn't spell mother as my wife's uncle likes to say and I?

25:32

Pulled the pen in December of 2016. I'm completely out of the Marines and

25:36

the end of that period

25:39

end of

25:41

2016 no yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

25:43

October of 2016 I get a training order to motor school

25:48

LAPD and

25:51

I'm happy as a pig and you know what and

25:53

I've been

25:56

I've been waiting for 10 years for this right

25:58

I'm blowing the motor school motor school and the Friday before the Monday. I was supposed to start they

26:03

They canceled the class, and I'm like wow man

26:06

I'm gonna have to wait another two years

26:08

And you know whatever and then we had this upstart that was supposed to be in the class

26:11

And you know he's like I'm gonna contest this I'm gonna grieve this we're gonna do this

26:15

We're gonna dish and I said look

26:16

That's not me you know you want to go and do the thing and we're a group and we want to know what happened

26:21

And we want to know what we can do to make this happen

26:23

I'm for it. I go, but I'm not a big can you know not a big raise a stink kind of guy in those?

26:28

those

26:30

situations and

26:31

So he did he went in representing us as a group and he brought our case up and then somehow some way the powers that

26:37

Be January 28th of 17

26:39

The month after I terminated my relationship with the Marine Corps

26:43

I got to go to motor school, and I aced it. You know I aced it

26:50

Not because anything I did it's really everything in my life is the foundation that the Pacific group gave me

26:56

you know get there early stay late and

26:59

Just do what we do you know not not this is not rocket scientist

27:06

I mean this I'm not trying to reinvent the wheel. I'm just trying to fit in not stand out

27:11

That's pretty much what I've been doing for the last three years riding a motorcycle meeting people

27:18

I like to say meeting eight to twelve new friends a day

27:22

well

27:25

And I will tell you I have stopped plenty of people in a program

27:28

and it's either identified by the keychain on the on the ignition key or the

27:33

number on the necklace or

27:36

The sticker on the car, and I would go up and I'd identify myself and say this is why I stopped you

27:43

then I go back to the bike and well I was in a car most of the time in that day and when those incidents and

27:48

I'd make them stir and then I go back and I'd say okay

27:51

I'm gonna exercise my discretion

27:52

And I'm gonna give you a warning and you're gonna call your sponsor and take a tenth on this and then walk away real quick

27:57

right and

27:59

And I get in the car, and I leave right and and and pretty much the same

28:04

You know prior service marine prior service army

28:08

You know go back to the car make them stir, but I must tell you I gave one marina ticket boy

28:13

He sure didn't act right and so

28:17

But you know my life is good today my wife, and I have two daughters like I said earlier

28:22

we were done after she and I had our first and

28:24

She was stepping stepmom to my 25 year old for 10 years. No 15 years of her life

28:31

So we were done, but um shortly after I finished the Academy she came out and said I'm late and

28:39

I'm like okay, and I really did I was like okay cool, and she was like no not cool

28:45

And I go well hey next step is go to the doctor. You don't even know if you're pregnant, right?

28:49

Yeah, she goes to the doctor. That's me so a couple days later. Yeah, exactly oops 30 seconds 30 seconds too long

28:55

So so so anyway she couple days later. She comes out, and I'm doing something in the driveway, and she's like standing on the boot

29:03

Yeah, no like yeah, and so you know we have our second my third daughter and

29:10

and

29:12

You know life is good. I have an ex-wife a wife a daughter a daughter a daughter a mother a sister

29:20

And if I'm lucky an uncle or a nephew that comes over you know

29:23

But um no alcoholics anonymous has given me a life that would have never imagined if you're new

29:31

I saw some hands go up, and if you're new

29:34

Art Cole did say this

29:37

Go to 90 meetings in 90 days don't drink or use in between meetings out of respect for the alcoholic who sober and at the end

29:45

Of 90 days if your life hasn't gotten better will gladly refund your misery um and that's what he told my uncle in

29:51

1973 and that's what I got to hear my uncle say every time I would go with him to hear him talk

29:57

I tell one quick story, so I'm like

29:59

17 I'm live. I'm no longer living in something to hunger because I'm a

30:04

self-imposed homeless person slash runaway and

30:07

I'm working at this boiler room right those are phone centers, and I used to be Jerry Mitchell at solar max power

30:16

I'm calling you because our inspectors are gonna be in your neighborhood and when they get by

30:21

They're gonna explain to you how much you could save with solar power sounds fair right be your own judge when they get there

30:28

They'll explain it to you and be your own judge

30:30

so

30:32

basically, we're just

30:34

So we're so we're doing this thing and uh and the guy they sent out here from Missouri

30:38

There's a big guy here from Missouri

30:39

He was talking about the guy they sent out here from Missouri to set up this thing in

30:43

California big pothead right and so I know guys who got pot

30:47

so I'm up into hunger at the pot connection to score for the guy in Woodland Hills and

30:52

The pot connections taking forever forever forever forever and my uncle calls me a pager you remember those beep beep

31:00

Hey, what's up, dude? Hey? I'm speaking down and wherever and you want to go to a meeting that oh, I can't do it

31:06

I'm working. Oh you're working. Yeah, I'm working

31:08

Some other time maybe right cuz you know I'm the self-imposed homeless person and so he says well if you go

31:15

I'll buy you dinner, and I go I can't not tonight

31:17

But thanks for the offer right cuz that usually would work right cuz at 135 pounds at 5 foot 8

31:23

You know it's like I could use a meal so the guy shows up. I give him the other guy's money

31:28

He gives me the thing I put it in the jacket this time

31:31

I'm wearing three jackets

31:32

You know that's why we roll right when we got the the flannel the Pendleton the down vest

31:37

Then the other jacket over the down vest and then the other jacket over that jacket

31:41

and then you know you got the pocket with your toothbrush and toothpaste and the pocket with the papers and then the

31:46

Dental floss right and then all the stuff right so I'm coming down from Tohunga

31:50

I get on the Sherman way because there's only certain routes you can do on a moped right so

31:55

You come down Sunland Boulevard, and it turns into Vineland

31:59

I think and then violent connects with Sherman way, and now you're westbound and Sherman way

32:03

And you're right around this area when a group of

32:05

Guys drinking beer in the back of the pickups decide to use you for target practice and start throwing their empties at you

32:12

Right and so you know they're yelling and oh I gotta tell you my head shaved

32:15

I got the freaking the punk rock look going right, and I'm it was a sight to see I got some pictures

32:22

but only a few but

32:25

Anyway, they're throwing empties at me, and we're on Sherman way, and I'm not doing everything

32:30

It's just to dodge these cans right and we could have been at White Oak. I don't know what Street

32:34

It was I just know I'm going west to north when I go and I take off right take off

32:39

You can only go 35 miles an hour in a moped right, but to my I don't know why I should have been surprised

32:44

They yeah the center median makes them have to go to the next corner right after you get them at the intersection

32:49

But sure enough they come back, and they're following me

32:53

Southbound and we get to victory where I start to go west again, right?

32:59

and

33:01

Between Lindley and Reseda. There's those communities where you can only get on there through the the sidewalk right you know the

33:09

Cinderblock walls so up on the sidewalk

33:12

the cinderblock wall and now I've lost them right so I get to like

33:17

one south of

33:22

Victory I don't know what Street is I think it starts with the e Irwin Irwin and Reseda. There's a red light

33:27

Because you know I know they're gonna catch me right and the light turns green so I know it doesn't turn green

33:33

I just let go I can't wait boom and I bone through the red right and now a car starts to come south on Reseda

33:38

Just as I bone through the red, and I think it's them right so going through the neighborhood right and also in the car turns

33:44

I oh and so I died just car for about two more blocks before they decide to turn a red light on yeah

33:48

so

33:51

so um

33:53

You know it's like you know

33:55

They're patting me down or going there to put my keys on them see they're putting my my knife on the seat

34:01

They're putting everything on a seat right, and I'm completely engaged with them now

34:05

I everything else before and what's gonna come later. It's just totally slipped my mind and

34:10

After everything said and done they write out a ticket for running the red light and you know

34:15

Oh, I say I cried like a right. You know. I mean I cry and then you know you got uh-huh

34:21

And so the senior copper gives me this ticket, and he goes everything you said might be true young man

34:27

But it doesn't allow you to go through this neighborhood at these speeds running red lights and risking other people's property and lies

34:35

Yeah, yeah, whatever right yeah, that's what you're thinking. Yeah, yeah, whatever pig and so uh so uh he takes everything off the hood of

34:42

The car sets it on the seat of the the bike gives me my copy of the ticket gets in the car and leaves

34:47

And so you now because you're that frickin?

34:50

Compulsive person that you are that I am the keys got to go in this pocket the toothbrush and toothpaste got to go back in

34:57

This pocket the hair combs got to go in this pocket

34:59

Everything's got to go back in its right place, and then because when you go to point a to point B

35:04

You always go keys wallet hair comb, but you know you do the little Mary a little dance right yeah

35:10

Oh, I got everything. I'm leaving now, and so uh I went hey. Where's my knife pig he kept my knife, right?

35:15

He did he kept my knife, but then I next thought I went what the hell am I going?

35:18

What the hell am I doing realize?

35:20

I was working right and I took my hand and I put it inside that outside jacket

35:24

And there it was and I was like and I'm telling you that it clicked because I'm 18 now

35:28

I'm not a juvenile you know I mean and there were so many more stories like that as a juvenile that ended up in the West

35:35

Valley Police Station right

35:36

But I got on that little thing and I mean and I started heading to Woodland Hills

35:42

And I got there and the dude said oh, it's about time right. You know what's up. No. Thanks. What a beard

35:48

No, thanks, what a crash

35:49

No, thanks, and I got back, and I just rode around the valley that night

35:53

And I said you know what you're an 18 year old loser. You couldn't complete high school

35:56

You can't even keep a job at Burger King. That's a whole nother story

35:59

What are you gonna do with your life, and I swear to you I heard boy

36:03

This is your last chance and the next day

36:06

I called that uncle and said hey, are you by chance going to a meeting tonight, and he said yeah?

36:11

I'm going with Cecil we're going down to Oceanside or San Diego or something

36:15

And I said cool and on the way back

36:17

It was a meeting like tonight two 10-minute speakers in the main speaker and then on the way back I cried

36:21

And my uncle said

36:26

And times up I'm done

36:28

he said go to 90 meetings in

36:31

90 days and out of respect for the alcoholic who's

36:35

Sober don't drink or use in between meetings and at the end of 90 days will gladly refund your misery and it far

36:42

Exceeds my expectations. Thank you for having me tonight