Updating Phone List Criteria and Traditions in Our Recovery Meeting
S25:E40

Updating Phone List Criteria and Traditions in Our Recovery Meeting

Episode description

The group reviews and revises the phone list eligibility rules, aligning them with membership definitions and quality‑of‑life meeting commitments. A motion passes unanimously to formalize the changes, followed by brief planning for a community birthday celebration.

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0:00

That's what we got here, and we'll open up with, I'll help you through this one and the next time you'll have anything for us.

0:10

So meeting is called order. We didn't have any minutes sent from the last meeting.

0:15

Okay, so Nate, did you mention that you were going to...

0:19

Yeah, I'm going to work on it.

0:20

So we're in Leon.

0:21

I'm going to have minutes to you.

0:24

I'm not learning it.

0:25

Five days before is normal.

0:27

Okay, so we don't have any minutes.

0:28

So we have to do a roll call, a secretary roll call.

0:31

Starting with Tuesday with Joe-Joe.

0:34

Joe-Joe? We did?

0:35

We generally do, yes.

0:36

Yeah, okay.

0:37

Brad?

0:38

Brad?

0:39

Yes sir.

0:40

Next up.

0:41

Next up.

0:42

All right, we have a fresh news report.

0:46

I'm sorry, Brad.

0:47

Can we finish the roll call?

0:48

Can we do a roll call?

0:49

You're covering for Joe?

0:50

Where is Joe-Joe?

0:51

Okay, no Joe-Joe.

0:52

Wednesday.

0:53

Second by Abe.

0:54

You would ask for discussion.

0:56

Any discussion?

0:58

You could ask.

1:00

That's the basic business.

1:02

Do you want to report anything, Billy, on the last meeting?

1:05

Anything from the last meeting?

1:07

Any of the old business?

1:09

Were we going to talk about the traditions for the phone list?

1:16

Qualifications?

1:17

Yeah, I think it's a great idea.

1:20

You mentioned us reviewing our traditions.

1:23

I think we can do that if everyone's willing to stay for, I don't know, 30 minutes at a

1:29

time so we can actually go through them after we've conducted the normal business.

1:34

If not, we can kind of take the phone list as an item and we can probably nail it.

1:39

I think all of us pretty much agree, and then I'm happy to make a motion to speed things

1:44

up, that if you are attending a quality of life meeting on a regular basis, a meeting,

1:49

whatever that a meeting is, and you want to be in a phone list, you should be entitled

1:53

to be in that phone list.

1:55

That doesn't mean that we throw you a picnic and have a watch for you, but that you're

1:59

on the phone list.

2:00

You get to declare whether your kids would be on it or not.

2:03

I think we were pretty much in consensus that for a regular tender, one that got sober here

2:10

generally, follow instructions when 90 and 90 goes to two meetings of quality of life

2:15

at least a week with commitments at those meetings.

2:19

And with the support of your sponsor at that point, you can bring forth a request for a

2:25

picnic or a watch, right?

2:28

And I think that I didn't see anyone objecting to that.

2:31

That's probably about as lenient as we can possibly get.

2:34

That's good.

2:35

But I still think it upholds our traditions.

2:37

I think it allows people to get on a list, okay?

2:40

I think it allows some of our other people that weren't able to before to be a part of

2:45

the family, which we need.

2:46

We need to grow the family.

2:48

And yet it does still put a requirement on newer people that want to have events, right?

2:54

So I'd like to make a motion that we change the criteria and I think we should have to

2:59

update our traditions, right?

3:01

Make a note of that.

3:03

And, Abe, you just said, so that's a great thing to do, Abe, and we're all grateful for

3:11

that.

3:12

So I guess what I'm hearing is that we're not going to really have a traditions workshop

3:18

or meetings that if you review them and you have comments or suggestions for change, you

3:25

would get those and you would bring those to this meeting, right?

3:28

Yeah.

3:29

We who have access.

3:30

So they'll come to us.

3:31

All right.

3:33

Let me get to finish this part of the business and then let's continue that.

3:36

I'm going to make the motion, and we'll update it in the traditions permanently, that anyone

3:42

that comes to a quality of life meeting who wishes to go on the phone list can go on the

3:48

phone list.

3:49

And that picnics, parties, all of that will be subject to two quality of life meetings

3:55

with commitments at those meetings in support of their sponsor.

3:58

That's my motion.

3:59

Second that motion.

4:01

Any discussion on that?

4:03

Well, it's an interesting question because when we had meetings, say, we have business

4:09

meetings at all, but only quality of life members can participate in discussion and

4:15

vote.

4:16

So we're really saying two things.

4:18

The criteria for the phone list may be different than being a member of our group, okay?

4:24

Unless we want to basically say that you're a member of this group, if you're going to

4:28

have one meeting with a commitment, you can call yourself a member, we'll consider you

4:31

a member.

4:32

So I would change that to a definition of membership and phone list criteria.

4:36

Will you accept that as a friendly amendment?

4:39

Yes.

4:40

Okay.

4:41

So that would define membership, define member, and vote list.

4:44

I think that's fine, guys.

4:46

Let's get over ourselves.

4:48

Not really.

4:49

The chairs, they rule 62 me.

4:52

All right.

4:53

Any other discussion?

4:54

You should be doing this, Billy, but I'm going to do it for you so we can get over this.

4:58

All in favor.

4:59

Aye.

5:00

Aye.

5:01

Aye.

5:02

Aye.

5:03

Aye.

5:04

Aye.

5:05

Aye.

5:06

Aye.

5:07

Aye.

5:08

Aye.

5:09

Aye.

5:10

Aye.

5:11

Aye.

5:12

Aye.

5:13

Aye.

5:14

Any abstentions or objections?

5:15

Passes unanimously.

5:16

Okay.

5:17

Couple things.

5:18

I'm making an announcement that I'm going to be organizing a 30-year birthday party

5:19

for Susan.

5:20

Hello, Susan.

5:21

Hi, Susan.

5:22

Hi, Susan.

5:23

My birthday is coming up from San Diego.

5:24

Oh, my.

5:25

Oh, I don't like it.

5:26

Hey, do you kind of suck?

5:27

I had a wish.

5:28

Now I've done the list.

5:29

With me number 26, I think it was.

5:30

Oh, is that right?

5:31

Let's see what it is.

5:32

Yeah, your birthday's the 22nd, so it's the 26th.

5:33

Oh, no.

5:34

1026 is Sue M's party.

5:35

Thank you.

5:36

I'm throwing it.

5:37

I'm coming to you for conventions.

5:38

Where is it?

5:39

Same shtick.

5:40

It'll be over at--

5:41

Dearborn.

5:42

Dearborn.

5:43

Now let me ask you a question.

5:44

When we're at Dearborn, we can't have people from all over the world.

5:45

The chapters in other states join us.

5:56

Do we want to start thinking about doing those picnics here?

6:00

Of course, we'll have to talk to Victor.

6:02

This way, you can attend virtually, too, if you want to participate or--

6:06

No, that's not great.

6:07

No, not yet.

6:08

No, it's just a thought, you know.

6:10

Yeah.

6:11

Yeah.

6:12

You don't have to worry about saving the park.

6:14

That, too.

6:15

Oh.

6:16

That's--

6:17

Right.

6:18

Oh, that's a big one.

6:19

Yeah.

6:20

It's a little bit easier.

6:21

Oh, she's going to beat her things.

6:22

Yeah, that's true.

6:23

Yeah.

6:24

Okay, so why don't we just leave it at Dearborn Park.

6:27

That sounds good.

6:28

I think if there was anything-- Oh, there's one other thing.

6:31

You know, our Tuesday night meeting has really launched well, okay?

6:34

There was a couple of things for the notes that I took.

6:37

Our meeting format is great.

6:39

We don't have a name, and the three names that we've arrived at, we should really decide,

6:43

so we can stick it in the format and get off the list.

6:47

"Living Sober."

6:48

This was through Shenzhen BT.

6:49

There were 30 of them.

6:50

We had them turned down for two weeks, and we came up with three.

6:54

"Living Sober," "Principles in Practice," or "Recovery Remix," unless you can think

7:00

of another one.

7:01

But this is another name already.

7:02

So if we talk from Tuesday, we'll just get one.

7:05

John K. came up with "Recovery Remix," being the-- not the millennial-- the Gen Z.

7:11

The Gen Z.

7:12

The millennial.

7:13

Yeah, I'm a millennial.

7:14

I was born in India.

7:15

Hey, Bennett.

7:16

Bennett liked "Principles in Practice," right?

7:19

We've already had two meetings on Tuesday.

7:21

Let's figure it out tonight already.

7:23

Let's get it done.

7:24

I want to get the formats done and off my list.

7:28

If you are going to one meeting of Quality of Life with a commitment, and you call yourself

7:34

a member, you're a member.

7:36

I mean, I understand what you're saying, Bennett.

7:38

I think we need to hang loose, and let's just change this for now.

7:42

Yeah, and then we'll have a fun time for someone to have a milestone picnic.

7:45

I think we'll all be able to get on the same page.

7:47

Right?

7:48

Getting back to the story of the Tuesday Night Meeting, there is one additional name that

7:51

came up tonight from Scott, and that was the Quality of Life Tuesday Night Taco.

7:57

Okay, so let's do a poll.

8:01

All in favor of the Quality of Life Taco Tuesday meeting of Alcoholics Night.

8:09

Okay, two, three, four, five.

8:12

Any others?

8:13

I can't see anyone else on Zoom.

8:15

Taco Tuesday?

8:16

Listen, if we're going to have fun, let's hustle.

8:19

Hi, you've got a great big taco.

8:22

It's going to be great.

8:24

Put a little taco next to it.

8:26

That's good.

8:27

I wonder if people are going to think that this is a bad time to share.

8:29

We can do some taco.

8:30

Yeah, I like it.

8:32

Anyone for recovery remix?

8:33

One for principles in practice?

8:36

I'll work for that one.

8:37

One, two, three, four, five.

8:39

Yeah.

8:40

Is that five?

8:41

Five.

8:42

Was that five?

8:43

Wait, did you count two?

8:44

Count back.

8:45

Wait, back.

8:46

That was five.

8:47

One, two, three, four, five.

8:49

That's a tie.

8:50

No one for summer?

8:51

Okay, so let's...

8:52

I'm going to report.

8:54

Okay, round two.

8:55

Round two.

8:56

Principles of...

8:57

I mean, I don't know what I'm going to do.

8:59

Oh, Nancy's defected.

9:00

Nancy's defected.

9:01

Come on.

9:02

Come on.

9:03

We're going to go with principles in practice.

9:08

Hey.

9:09

I'm going to go to the H&I meeting with Billy.

9:11

I'll meet you there, Billy.

9:12

You mean the other group?

9:13

Huh?

9:14

The other group.

9:15

What did I say?

9:16

The other group.

9:17

You said H&I.

9:18

Oh, we probably need to find people interested to go in H&I.

9:20

We want to get out and bring people here.

9:22

It's like panels.

9:23

The next thing, and maybe we could talk about this at the next meeting, is Alex is working

9:27

on the flyers.

9:29

I've put up a few different drafts.

9:30

Ben suggested Alex take a stab at it.

9:32

Maybe we'll see that in this decade.

9:36

And what we need to do is we'll get engaged.

9:38

We need to...

9:39

Oh, there is one other thing.

9:40

David Figueroa.

9:41

No, I went to Central Office.

9:43

I had lunch with David.

9:44

We talked about all this.

9:45

So everything we're trying to do, he's 100% on board.

9:48

Okay?

9:49

And we know that Lucky and everyone working in recovery centers has been in great direction

9:53

in terms of how do we gain exposure.

9:55

Well, it means that we have to take some action.

9:58

Okay?

9:59

And not just one person.

10:00

A bunch of us need to do it.

10:02

So what does that mean?

10:04

Going to Tarzana to pick up people.

10:07

Okay?

10:08

If you can do it, we need to get it done.

10:10

Going to H&I, that's how we get active on panels and people get to see us going to other

10:17

meetings.

10:18

One of those issues was the...

10:20

The whole of this guy had an Alkathon this last weekend, which David wanted to know.

10:25

If we were interested, I couldn't give him an answer because we need for the group to

10:30

talk about this.

10:31

In the past, we've been invited to Alkathons.

10:34

Sometimes with enough advanced notice, sometimes without.

10:38

Sometimes we were given flyers that said we were going to speak the next day.

10:41

We didn't even know about it.

10:42

Okay?

10:43

But in the case of...

10:44

And despite how we feel and arrived at the conclusion that we were being asked because

10:49

we were a large group, that brought a lot of seventh tradition fundraising to this Alkathon.

10:54

Okay?

10:55

That was a legitimate point.

10:56

Okay?

10:57

But now we're small, trying to grow.

10:59

And the question is this.

11:02

Do we want to make ourselves available to go participate in Alkathons?

11:06

Because there's a lot of them out there.

11:08

Okay?

11:09

That's the only way people are going to get to know us.

11:11

We're going to get to meet other people, get to invite them to our meetings, and get on

11:16

the same roadmap that everyone else is on.

11:19

Okay?

11:20

There's lots of groups out there that are constantly having meetings in Alkathons and

11:25

are actively involved in a community.

11:28

We're not.

11:29

Okay?

11:30

So again, I'm happy to do as much as I can, but not just groups.

11:34

Okay?

11:35

So the message is that you give us some thought.

11:37

I think what I'll do is I'll ask David to let us know about Alkathons as far in advance

11:42

as possible so we can talk about them.

11:44

Okay?

11:45

I don't know who can go pick up.

11:47

That's what Adam was talking about very seriously, and that was we need to go out and bring people

11:53

here.

11:54

Okay?

11:55

In the case of Lucky, he talked about van meetings.

11:58

So there's a way to reach out to these sober living facilities that have vans and the vans

12:04

take them to meetings.

12:05

We need to get on their list.

12:07

Okay?

12:08

So I'm happy to work with Lucky on that to find out who they are.

12:11

And once these flyers are created, I'm happy to go to a hole in the sky and do whatever

12:16

and stick it on their goddamn boards just like we have here.

12:19

Okay?

12:20

But amid central office, David said now that we've changed our format for Wednesday to

12:24

more than a 15 minute, you know, have a half a doughnut in the oven, that he's going to

12:29

send people to our meetings because they're actually a meeting and not just a 15 minute

12:34

social hour.

12:35

Okay?

12:36

If we're going to grow, this is what we have to do.

12:38

They can't be just one person.

12:39

The convention planning committee is another way, right?

12:42

Yeah.

12:43

The convention is great.

12:44

It's all about, yeah.

12:45

And your sisters, Nissi in particular, have done a great job of working at that convention

12:50

for years.

12:51

I mean, we did when we were together, but you continue to do it, including Lacy being

12:56

the convention chair.

12:58

I mean, and organizing the big go and doing all that stuff.

13:03

Yeah.

13:04

That's right.

13:05

We were sleeping on the floor during convention at two o'clock in the morning on security,

13:09

sleeping on couches.

13:11

Anyway, so give it some thought.

13:13

I understand everyone's busy, everyone works, everyone has a career, everyone has a family.

13:17

I sure the fuck did when I was early in sobriety too, and somehow I did it.

13:22

Okay?

13:23

So I will tell you that I'm personally committed to doing this, working with FID and bringing

13:26

back all the opportunities.

13:28

Okay?

13:29

But we should not be accepting what I think is we don't want to accept how good thought

13:36

invitations with three people.

13:38

We either shut up at four so we don't do it.

13:40

Okay?

13:41

Otherwise it's an embarrassment.

13:42

Yeah.

13:43

Okay?

13:44

So unless there's anything else, we can call the meeting and...

13:46

Motion opposed.

13:47

And with that, good evening.

13:49

Good luck.

13:50

Good luck.

13:51

Good luck.

13:52

Good luck.

13:53

Good luck.

13:54

Good luck.

13:55

Good luck.

13:56

Good luck.

13:57

[crosstalk]

13:58

Good luck.

13:59

Good luck.

14:00

[crosstalk]